Lizzlepants π
@lizzlepants.bsky.social
π€ 4915
π₯ 1315
π 4258
resident pantologist
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:3dg5zlv5v6tbzizwatnunvwu/feed/aaabx33niyxtm
pinned post!
revenge is a dish best served after Iβve licked everything on the plate
about 2 months ago
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Ink Radio
1 day ago
Ainβt it weird how you canβt touch music. But music touches you.
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Jo
4 months ago
I don't think we were meant to be hyper aware of our nervous systems at all times.
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Surprised Face Guy
5 days ago
I made you a mixtape, your honor.
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π²πππ£πππ£
about 11 hours ago
yeah sex is cool but have you ever been excused from jury duty during voir dire for a multi-day criminal trial
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Cashlin
about 10 hours ago
Smoking that old school 2006 runescape monster energy marijuana strain
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ππ¦π©ππ π¦
about 11 hours ago
Let's show everyone our unrelenting love on the oily lanes at our local bowling alley
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Daisy
8 days ago
I just wanna sit on your faβ¦..ncy furniture
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Blair Loudly
1 day ago
i wish i was rich enough to be publicly unhinged
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Frostbitten Flamingo
about 21 hours ago
He's a 10 but he processes emotions like a Victorian gentleman.
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ΠΌΙΠ³ΞΊ
about 10 hours ago
We are, apparently, in the seventh year of 2020.
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Emmaβ’
about 10 hours ago
people are only mad at me because i say it like it is... and also because i am a cunt who actively antagonized them
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Greg the Miller
about 11 hours ago
no iβm not βdetail orientedβ thatβs where the devil is
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The Most Manliest Man
about 10 hours ago
i really gotta learn how to cook restaurant food sucks now
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korpisworld
about 10 hours ago
Itβs Wednesday night, which means tomorrow is Thursday, which is basically Fridayβs intern.
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sweetie Ο
about 1 year ago
*eating buttered toast* my day wonβt get any better than this
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dave the regretfully yours crab
about 11 hours ago
my peopling capacity is dwindling
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Reverie
about 11 hours ago
Iβve been hallucinating spiders on me again, but I only do the drugs that Iβm supposed to
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Grimking
about 10 hours ago
Please cancel my free 7-day trial of 2026.
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about 10 hours ago
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π¨ Myandra is pissed off. π¨ All fascists-fuck off. 86/47
about 12 hours ago
Be the reason the lights flicker and chamber music starts playing whenever you enter the room.
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Xavier Horatio Xinicit π
about 13 hours ago
I wish I had the confidence of a person who has only read one book
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grilled cheese π§
1 day ago
humpty dumped me
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Kellalena
about 15 hours ago
I do a stand-up job at finding places to sit down
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Valerie
about 16 hours ago
Being a teenager with teen angst during the peek teen angst music period was a transcendent experience.
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Little Miss Whiny
about 15 hours ago
Running out of patience counts as cardio, right?
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crumbum
1 day ago
The path of exasperation.
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wild animal
about 15 hours ago
Okay well I'm gonna tweet dumb unrelated stuff I'm not being insensitive I'm distracting myself for health
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Kellalena
4 days ago
If you canβt handle me at my expecting the worst, you donβt deserve me at my it wasnβt as bad as I thought.
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BEAVE
about 16 hours ago
The fat loss industry hates this one simple trick: stop eating like a raccoon in a dumpster with free will.
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chris.
about 17 hours ago
People all up in my grill, expecting me to do my job at my job.
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raindro
3 months ago
dishes are the laundry of the kitchen
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Canadian Bacon
about 17 hours ago
My cat is snoring and I canβt help but be jealous.
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π±πΏπΌπ·πΌπ§©
1 day ago
just finished serving time for pulling the tag off a mattress
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Frances Meh
1 day ago
i've been to the gym 6 times is that enough
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Jason, ex Inferis
1 day ago
Every part of the vagina also sounds like something you would see on a medieval map
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Ashley
about 17 hours ago
You ever think they created ai to turn us against each other and against the ai so we donβt turn against them? Arbyβs employee: you want your usual order?
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Random Muser
5 days ago
just found out Spanish moss is not native to Spain nor is it moss and nothing makes sense any more
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ceej
2 days ago
(first guy to go bald) haha what if we all wore hats, which I just invented for no reason
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Hristos se rodi to everyone in Serbia! π·πΈπ looking forward to my son-n-law being our polaΕΎajnik this evening π½οΈπ»
about 17 hours ago
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The Hubris Guy
about 19 hours ago
I called my rep and let out a huge diatribe and they owned me by saying βsir this is a Wendyβs drive thruβ and hanging up
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James Damron
1 day ago
So far, 2026 keeps reminding me why everyone over 40 has a bucket of Tylenol and a heating pad.
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los π¦¦
about 19 hours ago
come for for the jokes, stay for the hot take on someoneβs hot take about someone elseβs hot take on someonβ¦
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spleenly
about 20 hours ago
Inventoried my bullshit and may be time for a clearance sale.
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DaddyJew
about 20 hours ago
living life one shitstorm at a time
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Greeneville Zoo
about 19 hours ago
Please stop painting realistic pictures of tunnels. The coyotes are getting hurt.
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Read description!
about 19 hours ago
Wendy's just called me a dumbass for not getting a combo meal
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Fantastic M. Fox
about 19 hours ago
It would probably be a net positive for everyone here if the site crashed for 24-48 hours
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Julie Lavender Menace
about 19 hours ago
I've been binge watching this show called Fireplace for weeks now.
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I feel like I need a boyfriend to skeet about so Iβm finna make one up his name is Walter and he brings me coffee every morning and always buys the right tampons
about 19 hours ago
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Frances Meh
about 19 hours ago
you don't hear a lot of songs about peter brady going through puberty these days
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