A good strategy is to paralyze your opponent, cast some kind of touch spell that does damage for awhile, like poison, then retreat to a farther range to cast your targeted, long range spells. Recast paralyze if the creature isn't dead by the time they reach you again.

feeling absolutely fucked by how many different birds exist.

“Here we go” said Frog.

well aren't you judgy

Sometimes I learn about some beef on here where accounts are accusing each other of being fucked up or cringe or whatever and if I can't figure out the truth of the matter within about 3 minutes I give up.

the ford motor company has fired me as a brand representative because of my revisionist take on mao

I get the grindset and all but personally I would wait a bit longer instead of immediately trying to fill the void Kirk left behind

when the sequel antagonist is contrasting 😤

I need to go gather a consortium of like-minded individuals about this

Allegorical barkeepet mixing metaphors

This account, username: “admin,” password: “admin,” was found in a data breach. Consider changing your password

StoneTossComicEditedToBeMoreRacist and 5 others liked your post

Draw a card for each minion type among your friendly minions

Wikipedia: Jack falls down the hill and injures his head. Jill stumbles as well shortly after. TVTropes: The hill scene. Dear God, the hill scene. Not only did Jack fall down and get a head injury, his sister did as well. Water fans will think twice about fetching a pail after seeing this!

God gives his barkiest dogs to His strongest my neighbors

New Chewable Diet Coke

Cataclysm #GoogleTranslatesMTG

this is how a true poster lives

Finally cured my Balatro addiction by getting back into my Slay the Spire addiction

I'm a lot like Erika Kirk in that I've also forgiven Charlie Kirk's killer

-FAIL! Your REST stat is not high enough to use EXPERT BED. -FAIL! -FAIL! -SUCCESS! You rested 8 Hours on WET LOG. -LEVEL UP!

Implications are one of my favorite things to consider

Be sure to empty your dustbins of history out to the trash cans of history before the garbage man of history makes his weekly garbage disposal visit of history

unbelievable, this book is a giant scam

They may only be doing so for cynical reasons, but Burger Kint isn't lying when they tell me that I rule.

People have a lot of questions about my children's book, The Tree That Could Not Be Described, that are pretty clearly answered by the title.

I've just been vaccinated against Tylenol

In programming, you can't nest sets of quotation marks without escaping the inner ones. But in real life, you can. In real life, nobody can stop you.

going to chatgpt, typing in "whomst" and then closing the page before it can respond

I think "reverse harem" should be called "harem" still. I'm a feminist that way.

Every Sunday we're forced to sit through a song about how Peter Griffin is a "Family Guy", then 20 minutes of evidence to the contrary when his show plays. Are we supposed to believe he is the hero of the show? That man is horrific

*parries your strongest attack effortlessly*

just got 6,000 XP

Hard to blame Pope Pius IX for abandoning Rome when he did. If a bunch of people stabbed my best friend in the carotid artery and then demanded I go to war with Austria I'd probably flee too

Going to be honest for a solid few days after Jimmy Kimmel got canceled I thought he was the other one

The worst part about having a stroke is that you have no way of knowing if your toast is burning

CHOTINER: This game you like to play, what's it called? ME: Slay the Spire. CHOTINER: And you play it on the computer? ME: Yeah. Well, I also have it on my phone. I played another 300 hours. CHOTINER: And these other games in your Steam library. Have you finished them? ME: Now hold on a second,

guy learning about important figures in Italian independence: "what, so they're all named Giuseppe then?"

please do not put in the newspaper about how Kissinger liked my star wars book

cackling

I'd probably be a good political writer. I bet I could inflame passions.

I get that it's like, symbolic for people to fire four bullets at a time in jojo part 6 but like, you can't fire 4 bullets from a gun and have those bullets travel in a uniform group that's not how bullets work

> "this character needs no introduction" > they introduce him anyways

If you mash the audio example buttons on the wikipedia page for the IPA vowel sounds you can create a choir of mildly disgusted men

Every single account on this website is muting me

writing is just making up a guy for the other guys you made up to get mad at

Too late, Batman. Once this Tylenol floods the city's water supply, my wiki won't run out of editors ever again