fuck

i should get another piercing

i saw one notification of someone mentioning a burger offhand in a gc convo i was not a part of and i immediately got up and got drove to get a burger ate the burger and a side and came back all in about 20 minutes. i physically returned five minutes ago. my consciousness is returning in waves now

why was i like this where is this contempt coming from

i need to apologize for my disgusting lack of faith i was wrong

the yogurt situation is getting out of control

hi. i think you’re really beautiful. can you kick me in the stomach

RT

🚨 Your blokes are doing fuck all! 🚨 Activate your blokes to keep them hearty. 🚨 To activate a bloke, right-click and assign them to a pint.

prenatals fixed this btw

TETO WORD OF THE DAY: strip

this is still ongoing but im now plugged into two different spaces for this exact thing so i'll be putting requests here less often

i placed a pickup order for all of the face and hair and makeup products i let run out, a gallon of pee cleaner, a mattress protector, and an unthinkable quantity of yogurt and sardines. theyre thinking god this is probably the baddest bitch alive

i started eviscerating people with my grievous talon at work and my boss was so impressed that i got to go home early

this keeps happening and its not my fault either

ah.. the classic Queen's Armpit opener..

call me fl studio the way i give her computer ne no no not her *computer* im not giving her c god okay shes no okay shes on the computer and im and you know what just forget it just fucking forget it nevermind

i'm back in ways that you can scarcely fathom. nothing in particular happened to cause this it's just something i woke up and decided today

sharp hamburger

oh and this from a few days ago i like whatever is going on here

okay fine i was wrong

when I’m naked and in the fetal position and covered in a mysterious slime that’s the real me

my fursona this is me

he said i should post my plates in the food channel

plesiosaur at sunrise

we have, roughly speaking, thirty seconds of "weather designed specifically for mara maybe🌦️" left in the rest of the year

a lot of strong competitors for a debut season, we're seeing some high level play only a short while in. this early on, it's hard to say whether the first elimination will galvanize the players into more careful play or start a death spiral, but one thing is for certain: it will be gruesome

i have somehow signaled to my coworker that know what discord is and that i understand how community drama operates bc he started venting to me about a ban in his server when i clocked in today

in one week i have 5 days where im not scheduled and im going to catch up on every piece of media i started and did not finish

Imagining there's a loose bird in bluesky like you see in walmarts or hardware stores

i have a new book which is not invisible cities by italo calvino that i used real money to purchase five days ago. which means that tonight i will be reading thats right, you guessed it: invisible cities by italo calvino

who saved this

my coworker walked in on my fridge time so this is a very short clip but look how pretty this is

anyway watch this drive

im finally getting a leg up on the fog and general regression that has been with me since last October, roughly. its a strange feeling but a welcome change to something that i had accepted as permanent

85 degrees tortential downpour and thunder who wants me

i have no idea what i posted i have no recollection of my posts during the outage

while the site is down did we ever find that country snakeroot was talking about where they let you tie people up and feed them slop and jerk them off into a bucket

since nobody can see these ill just say i really need to nevermind

everyone post more we can push the clog out and then the site will work again

guys i'm scared what's happening

did group chats break the site

If I were on Iron Chef or Chopped or similar as soon as the round started I would full speed sprint toward the prep station and jump pole vault style into one of the blenders feet first perfect form nothing but net instant death round ends in 1.5 seconds flat. The secret ingredient is me chef

Season one of onomatopoeia battle royale has begun.

haha what the fuck i look so good

flirting by saying "can i do this to you" and showing you diagrams of naval warfare

Transmitter

instead of group chats they should have invented a way for us to fight physically

"apps" or "Applecations" are a types of iphone website