two, also known as "the baker's one"

woke up as a skeleton and so obviously first thing i do is try playing my ribcage xylophonewise right? bad idea, i hit one rib and instantly pass out from the pain. don't even know what sound it made. life as a skeleton sucks. i gotta pee and i don't understand what to do about it

sixty five million years ago, dinosaurs perused the earth

my captors are going to lose it when they see the mess i made of my feeding area 🤪

watching the first movie you think Air Bud is like kind of a genius dog, but then later on they got little puppies flying around in a space shuttle and you go oh wait is he their Radio

this little paradigm / i'm gonna biggify

ok i'm not saying i think they're reptilians but if we're being honest here this eye situation is crazy

wow not only did he miraculously stop the bullet with his neck, he also produced a large amount of a divine viscous liquid in order to soak the bullet, rendering it totally inert, a heroic final act which ballistics experts say most likely saved several, if not even more lives

substances walked so items could run

thinking about a dog who recycles... what does this guy know about fuckin pollution or whatever. nothin. pick me behavior. it's a nice looking dog, but you gotta be Authentic bro

paradigm of smallness i know i know it's serious

"JIMMY TEN DICKS" https://bonequest.com/9684

i fucking hate today's paradigm of smallness

i don't know why this is happening to me

oh come on, no way slick willy goes to the gallows, the ol' smooth talker

occasionally get startled by the memory of how she says One Of Our Attorneys Is a Jyew

(guy with a website everyone used 10 years ago but now you mostly hear about how it was like, molesting children for a few years till someone made a stink so they just turned that off? it had a button?) in ten years we'll all be wearing shoes with cameras in the toe (tech reporters) WHATTA SCOOP!!

CONSERVATIVE GUY: we all remember what they did to us in summer of 2021... NORMAL GUY: was that beans CONSERVATIVE GUY: thrown into gulags!! NORMAL GUY: sure yeah, you can kinda throw whatever into a goulash

trump's toast!! buh bye orange man!!! you big dumb wrong country sayin' piece of shit, you're fired!! enjoy life on skid row. or, i guess he's still rich... cambodia. FUCK you, sir

ok i'm not saying i think they're reptilians but if we're being honest here this eye situation is crazy

watching the first movie you think Air Bud is like kind of a genius dog, but then later on they got little puppies flying around in a space shuttle and you go oh wait is he their Radio

they were originally going to put me on the doomed Challenger flight but my costume was too big

i bet other farmers must resent old mcdonald... i got all that same crap, they're sayin, where's my song? well fellas, why would they ever make another song about a very similar guy who has all the exact same crap?? they don't get it

woke up as a skeleton and so obviously first thing i do is try playing my ribcage xylophonewise right? bad idea, i hit one rib and instantly pass out from the pain. don't even know what sound it made. life as a skeleton sucks. i gotta pee and i don't understand what to do about it

they're happy to stay a step left of republicans because they think that means the whole left side of the spectrum owes their votes to the Lesser Evil so they can focus efforts on telling Greater Evil voters that they aren't even really that much less evil. they consider the left conquered territory

the only way for dems to win is with a proven loser strategy that in the long run would be an even bigger loser if it won

scoffing at people on the bus

trying to delete

ah good, they've made it spooky for me

look it's not like she was jacking off on a zoom call or something. these were serious allegations

paradigm of smallness i know i know it's serious

Rise of the Planet of the Apes Dawn of the Planet of the Apes War for the Planet of the Apes Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes 2: Monkey Madness

i would never live on a planet infested with disgusting apes

hoppin around in one huge boot like mario just fuckin trashing this circle k

i don't know why this is happening to me

(tommy lee jones holding a magnifying glass) the paradigms you see now.. it's hard to even take its measure

Obama (triumphant): Ladies and gentlemen, we tortured some folks

getting blasted by a bazooka squad sounds like it's gonna have an air of whimsy about it but it does not at all, it sucks ass

charlie brown very carefully avoiding that one hair in front with the bic

Faith in humanity restored!These captors allowed two terrified parents to hear their son's voice for the first time in weeks, and the video is EVERYTHING! [WATCH HERE×] [CLICK TO WATCH×] [FREE LINK×] [Video removed by uploader.] velocicaptor84 shows u captors aren't all bad freeMeSoon69 fuck u

i think this tree is in terrible pain

charlie brown very carefully avoiding that one hair in front with the bic

me: it hurts when i do this doctor (hitting me with my own hand): lol why do you keep doing it then

sixty five million years ago, dinosaurs perused the earth

(getting viciously attacked by my robot) i order you to stop aaagh OW ow OK buster you're in big trouble now, that's two laws of robotics yoAAAGGHHH OK OK FINE we can watch Forbidden fucking Planet again jesus christ MY ROBOT: You Must Now Turn Off Your Cell Phone (flurry of processor noises) Ho Mo

(guy with a website everyone used 10 years ago but now you mostly hear about how it was like, molesting children for a few years till someone made a stink so they just turned that off? it had a button?) in ten years we'll all be wearing shoes with cameras in the toe (tech reporters) WHATTA SCOOP!!

Here at the Trailblazer Innovation Institute we believe a path for America starts at knowing how new perspectives can revitalize old paths of the future with a hip spin that appeals to all voters. Think FDR. Too divisive right? Wrong. The R stands for Reaganomics. Now that's what I call a New Deal!