You like my socks or no?

I just pulled my forearm muscle shaking a big can of whipped cream. That's an embarrassing injury.

Rude that none of you are over helping fold my laundry.

When I'm in this scorching hot shower and face the water, my boobies say "ouch too hot" but when I turn around my booty says "not hot enough". What does THAT mean??

I am everything 😉

If I don't emerge looking like a cooked lobster, is the shower even hot enough?

I'm so cold I could hang ornaments from my nips

Well, do you????

That first bite of a corn dog is both a treat and dangerous. Never know if it'll burn the living shit out of you or if it will be the perfect temp for your lips.

I have one of those under the skin pimples and it hurts every time I cutely scrunch my nose.

I like to wear socks and scoot around the carpet then touch anything. Nothing like a morning zap

Tell me a secret.

Does running out of patience count as cardio?

Wearing a thong in the dead of winter is how I stay alive!! Nothing like a cold booty to give you that thrill.

Do I stay on the couch and scroll Tiktok or do I go to bed early and scroll Tiktok in bed? Decisions. Decisions.

All I want for Christmas is my baby back... baby back, baby back. Chili's. Baby back ribs. Barbecue sauce.

Getting spicy tonight

Can't a girl just float on a Spaghetti-O down the tomato soup river in peace? It's too cold for anything else.

It's so dry in my place there are literal sparks coming from my staticky blanket. My own personal bedroom firework show!!!

Massager on my neck. The moans I am making!!! Pretty sure it's releasing a demon in me.

Doesn't everyone lip sync and dance to Christmas music in a towel while waiting for their eggs to boil for lunch tomorrow or is that just me?

Heavily over ate. Time to shower and let the water massage my belly like the good boy it is.

On average,what volume level is your tv at? I'm at around 15 at the high end.

Sunday scaries have arrived. Fa la la la la la la la la 😭

🎵🎶🎵

This is actually a giant's hand and I am swimming in that hot coffee. It's wonderful. Can't you see me in there?

Facts

Sorry not sorry I checked out a few of your photos. The results are in, you are a cutie!!

Just got myself a starry galaxy projector for my bedroom so I can chill out and ignore all the haters ✌️

Things I find hot: Beards Light color eyes Tattoos Boobs Hot cocoa Coffee Habaneros The sun Fire Lava ...Oh wait.

Ngl I take two mega stuf, take a cookie off each, and smoosh them together. Humongous stuf

It's a long time because I used to eat literal blocks of cheese for days and I'm still kicking it

Also watching a cheesy Christmas movie. They are so bad yet so good

Jingle jangle dingle dangle. Putting up the ornaments on my tree

What are we doing tonight, people? Tell me now

Is there a harder work out than changing your fitted sheets????

Set a 30 minute alarm for my nap. I snoozed it every 10 mins for 2 hours and am just waking up. Lovely.

The sexiest thing a man or woman can do for me is wash the dishes, clean the house, any of that stuff. You'll be thrown into bed immediately.

I'm just a curious and nosy girly. Tell me something good

Ok ok I'm awake now. What did I miss!?

Is everyone's office holiday party tonight? Everyone seems drunk on here. I'm not complaining😉

All a girl wants is to be smeared in chocolate, put in a mug, heated up, topped with marshmallows, and slurped up. Is that so hard to ask?

I ate them all. No kisses for you

I'm eating a handful of Hershey kisses. Want some?

McDonald's bathroom is blaring Christmas music. So loud I can't hear myself pee. 😂

Friday: eating yogurt for dinner then going to look at Christmas lights. I know I'm a wild woman

Men, you will never understand the pure bliss from removing your bra after a day's work. It's a great feeling.

Oof. My hips hurt.

Oh my gawwwd. Finally made it to Friday!! Happy dance booty shake ensue

Not even 10 and I'm already in bed.