Good night, Bluesky! Sunset at the Space Needle, Seattle, Washington 📸Sigma Sreedharan

In celebration of International Women’s Day, I'm going to just shut the fuck up.

More daylight, darker sunglasses.

Oven clock, we meet again.

I love seeing other posts that I think I’ve inspired.

Yeah, I’d say penile fracture is serious side effect

well look at what the discovery feed dragged in

Testicular sounds like an app to help you get better at taking tests

Not now, I'm looking at puppies and kittens that I don't have time to adopt

I have free door dash so hmu

If my sky pic doesn’t get any more likes I’m gonna post hog

WOW, NEAT! -me when i see something neat

Today feels like a good day for nachos

can i just reincarnate as a dog already please

The Moon is up there all the time you know.

not to get all sappy but I’d stare at the clouds with you

If I had nudes, I’d only show you.

If I had a alt, I'd only tell you.

not to get all sappy but I’d stare at the clouds with you

I got a paper cut on my tongue from my cough drop

a gofundme but for reposts

The bottom of my drafts folder says, "so many thoughts, you should post one" but instead I'll just post that

really just want to be adored

maybe my lifes hard because im so sexy?

I wonder how many alts i haven’t followed back

Henceforth, anyone skeeting from the shitter has to put this emoji at the end of their skeet. 🚽

Letting an account I just followed smell my hand before I riff in their replies

I wouldn’t say I’m horny, but I can’t stop thinking about eating Reese’s pieces off your naked body

i'm just really bad at explaining is all

birds would murder their first born for that frenchy fry you be holding

More of you. Less of everything.

wearing my friday fat jeans. please respond.

*raises the bar* Bar: “put me down”

It’s Friday. I don’t trust it.

Ever seen one of those banana cleaners…those look useful

I’m eating Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups for breakfast, medicinally

It’s Friday. Show somebody your butthole.

My drafts are just a bunch of horny posts

Ew, no. *motions to everything*

There are days I wonder about me. Doesn’t last long, short attention span and all.

Remembering when "March Madness" was about basketball and not the entire fucking planet. Good times.

Wake up babe, it’s time to anger people on the internet

Wake up and say something funny

Did you just sniff my tits??? - me, to someone within tit-sniffing distance.

psssst, if a woman doesn’t want to talk to you in DMs that doesn’t mean she has a shitty personality or is a bitch so give your balls a tug and move on bro