Subtly downgrade a band Depeche Mid

Subtly downgrade a band: Barenaked Laddies

Funniest thing I did today was cancelling my Hulu bundle after they announced bringing Kimmel back cuz fuck those assholes.

if no one falls in love with me before the rapture do i spend eternity alone?

Just found the leftover pizza

despite all my sage I am still just a witch not a mage

Ill vaccuum after the rapture

Anyone having a rapture watch party?

<insert jovial morning greeting>

Going to make a sacrifice to an old one, anyone need anything while I'm out?

Subtly downgrade a band East Berlin

> subtly downgrade a band Princess

Counting Pigeons

Subtly downgrade a band Audioslave

subtly downgrade a band astray zeppelin

Subtly downgrade a band Dirt, Breeze and Embers

subtly downgrade a band South Boston

subtly downgrade a band u1

*mutes the word rapture because I’m not getting my hopes up again*

I was on Twitter for the Mayan rapture of 2012 and lemme tell you: I’ve spent every single day wishing it was true ever since

Elevated butthole skeet for you. www.sciencealert.com/fish-butthol...

*enters an MMA tournament listing my primary discipline as feng shui*

first date idea: going for a long ocean swim in the dark after huffing gasoline fumes

So @wilboo72.bsky.social posted about me last night as he has for four months and I let it go and today had enough and called him out below and he deleted his post as he does every time he drunk posts about me and deletes later. You can all make your own opinion but I’m sick of his shit.

Me: hey cake! why you so perfect. Cake: because am, bae.

the last person to log off tonight is “it” I don’t make the rules

ME: sorry, I’m ticklish NAIL TECH WITH A BLOODY RAG TO HER NOSE:

In the BlueSky olden days we’d pack a picnic lunch on Sunday afternoons and saunter down to the mill stream to fire off bangers in our bare feet

taping the small dorito pieces at the bottom of the bag together to make a normal size dorito makes them taste like tape

Host: Let's play Wheel Of Ornithology! Me: Are there any jays? Host: No sorry Me: I'd like to buy an owl

Classic Mets. Blowin' it in September.

China cannot be allowed to rot our brains! America called dibs a long time ago.

sliding into 80s music DMs…

Dating is a great way to realize that dying alone isn't the worst that could happen.

Prince was/will always be, Fucking Fabulous. 🔥🔥

Frank Black performing “Calistan” live in Boston in January 2025. Song from the Pixies’ frontman’s second solo album, 1994’s Teenager of the Year. m.youtube.com/watch?v=e-pj...

"We don't care how evil he is as long as he forces people to be 'good'"

Alwrong alwrong alwrong.

one pumpkin spiced new world order, coming right up

Nobody burns the house down anymore and that's sad.

Nobody takes me down to Paradise City anymore and that’s sad

pumpkin spice mustache rides

The Sixth Sense (1999)

Name a Film where the protagonist dies made before 2000.

Oh, did Bruce Springsteen’s “Atlantic City” come on? Better put it on repeat and do some pensive staring.

A wedge of cheese looking for the wheel it belongs to, a truly trying and lonely life

Hey! you. Pay attention to me.

Gotta be real careful when making cannibalism jokes lest the audience accuse you of bad taste

Before you block me, know that I was "a pleasure to have in class" on multiple occasions