Love is love. Pass it on.

May was ok Hoping for more from June

Good news: John Wick 5 Bad News: 2027 or…2028

*inventing italics* What if the letters looked like they were a little drunk

Make a movie into a porn title Good Will Humping

Make a movie into a porn title Pump Fiction

We should have named diaphragms cumbrellas

Pride month starts Monday, so I'll be spending the weekend plastering pride flags on everything, or as I call it, gaycoupage

My brain when a recipe calls for a small shallot, one garlic clove, and a pinch of salt:

How many little treats can you have before you can’t call it a little treat anymore

And now, a quick break for station identification: WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST USE THE DAMN ALT TEXT! We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming.

Cowgirl, so you can still yell at me.

🎶 Hold me closer, Tony Danza (Or however that Elton John song goes)

the more I listen the more I like the vibe of this band. tidal.com/track/423835...

inside me are two elixirs otherwise known as coffee and cheese

me: well, you're here now so let's just try to respect each other's space and keep the destructive behaviour to a minimum winter:

Would you mute me? I'd mute me. I'd mute me so hard.

And we let them. futurism.com/future-socie...

Hey, I can't come to work today because the Wordle was too hard.

If I find out that I'm really an extraterrestrial on some kind of Total Recall vacation I'm going to be pissed.

*plays drum fills during your meltdown

They'd have to put me to the sword before I'd join the military. But, I'd go defend the frontier from Xur and the Kodan Armada in a heartbeat.

Because this song makes me think Phil Collins is my spirit animal. www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLpf...

Love is love. Pass it on

It's a shame we'll never see each other again with the blocking and all

[first date] her: I want a man who’s not afraid to show his feelings me: well I cried when I watched Bambi her: every kid cried at Bambi me: this was last week

I just logged onto the Oreo website and it asked me to accept their cookies.

Within a fortnight of tossing the prior one, the universe provided me a new one.

i'm the guy that still burns himself using a towel taking things out of the oven while there are two pairs of oven mitts hanging on the side of the oven

i was licking the cheetos dust off my fingers thinking, it would be great to be able to dunk my fingers in a jar of this and i look on amazon and found something life changing

i water my garden with the hose i drink from don’t make it weird

socks are just feet underwear

INTERVIEWER: Under weaknesses it says ‘denial’. Can you elaborate? ME: I didn’t write that.

Fuck rings. Wear my blood in a vial around your neck so I know it’s real.

This country hasn't been the same since "Twilight" came out.

If there is love, smallpox scars are as pretty as dimples. -Japanese proverb

I think I'd be a cute werewolf, all fluffy, warm, and lounging in the full moon, not eating villagers or anything. Just me and werewolfery.

David Bowie said “Let’s Dance” … so, bitch.. you better dance…

Love will win. Happy Pride Month 🏳️‍🌈

If you don't like super hero movies then don't watch them.

I want a nap, but frankly, it's too late. So I've got that going for me

Love is love. Pass it on.

Love is love. Pass it on.

Love is love. Pass it on.

Love is love. Pass it on.

can’t rn, rationalizing irrational thoughts

choking on my own spit mid sentence is how i flirt

Love is love. Pass it on.