(Gaga) 🎶 Can’t read my, no he can’t read my, Gravy face (She’s got me like nobody) G-g-g-gravy face

Gravy a song: 🎶 Ain't no gravy when she's gone It's not warm when she's away Ain't no gravy when she's gone And she's always gone too long Anytime she goes, gravy 🎶

Gravy a song: 🎵🎶 I’d Do Anything for Gravy (But I Won’t Do That) 🎵🎶

I lost my book about vegetables. I'm sure it will turnip...

So, anyone else ever wake up in the middle of a cacti farm wearing a wedding dress, and holding a 55 gallon barrel of mayo while a polka band plays Rancid?

How I arrived on Bluesky:

Today's random thought: Boneless chicken wings = chicken nuggets for grownups.

Live up to my potential? Sounds tiring.

bottling my farts so i can deliver them directly to your doorstep

I spewed Diet Coke through my nose whilst reading your skeet. Please respond.

Whilst Bluesky was down, I played World of Warcraft like a responsible adult.

Marc Anthony has had more wives than I have RL friends

I’m not proud of it but if Forrest Gump started talking to me on a bench I’d have left

We could look at the moon together at the same time to feel connected or! We could all poop at the same time and be connected via our buttholes

If Bluesky goes down for good I'll just go back to posting on the men's room stall. Way less ads and porn there really

for some reason, it feels like they ought to sell wheat by the ream

It's Fabulous Friday, where everything is possible. Replace the word fabulous with fucked as that's how the world is when it comes to quality assurance. Sales: "I assure you, our products meet the highest standards" Production: "The fuck is does." youtu.be/utLwdxt1UPA?...

The ending that Spielberg never really wanted to show us. He didn't complete that call as dialed.

If it looks like a butthole, moves like a butthole, smells like a butthole, welcome to Bluesky

“my butthole” -a bsky anthem

Reasons to keep bsky: a thread 🧵

Bsky app team went swimming and this is what we got for a pool.

This should be trending, but no.

Why can't I be on a moderation list called "Hates AI, But Loves Cheese".

You mean I dusted off an old VHS of The Day After for nothing?

What movie defines the 80s for you? 🎥🖤 The Goonies

Share a preacher, nun, or priest (Clancy Brown as Brother Justin Crowe)

I just want everyone to know I created a skeet that's too dangerous to be released to the public.

Still punk. consequence.net/2026/04/iggy...

I've decided to dither more.

No no no no no no no no. Come up with something original and stop fucking with stuff! comicbook.com/movies/news/...

Thursday is Aristotle's birthday. Please drink philosophically.

Be nice to people on the way up because half of them are probably carrying concealed weapons.

The first guy to start fires was a pyroneer.

How I arrived on Bluesky:

Best Star Trek captain. Wrong answers only.

How I arrived on Bluesky:

In-n-Out-Hole

the boys ran the blockade and are back in town

Post a character that starts with the letter B (First or last)

🎶taking' care of buttholes🎶

i'll be the judge of that, your honor

Best Star Trek captain. Wrong answers only.

bluesky and i have something in common. we're both broken and unfixable

Which essential oil is best for repelling human interaction?

I think I'm getting kind of not terrible at this.

(REO Speedwagon) 🎶 And I’m gonna keep on reskeeting you… ‘Cause it’s the only thing I wanna do…

Is this about me? This feels like it's about me.

Guys! Guys! The boys are back in town, and they’re putting cilantro in the gravy!