"Holy shit, did WE ever make the right decision" - The US Women's Hockey Team

Walk aside the true folk, and let the traitors stay.

These dogs are having the time of their lives following this week's historic blizzard in the Northeast. Please enjoy. 14/10 for all

One day, at least some of these hockey players will have to explain to their children why they allowed themselves to be used by a fascist.

Me: Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? The plumber: Knock yourself out. This is still gonna cost you eight hundred and fifty bucks.

Insane that I have the ick for an entire men’s hockey team at once.

They should make overthinking that’s positive

i can’t just follow people back all willy-nilly i have to see our moots, check out your tl, fly a drone over your house to make sure you’re utilizing indigenous plants in your landscaping so as not to waste precious water resources

We all know that folding a fitted sheet is utterly nonsense. It's origami for crazy people.

We deserve the digital hellscape we’ve brought upon ourselves.

When you've been in the pub all day with your mates and come out into the fresh air.

Nap time with Erza 💤

There aren't enough love stories told through coffee commercials anymore.

I knew my girlfriend for 20 years before we went on our first date I like to take things slow

What a remarkable young woman.

FUCK the U.S Men’s Hockey Team. Seriously.

HIPSTER: i was eating pizza before it was cool ME: did u burn ur mouth

"The men implicated in the Epstein files reinforces that I spend half my life explaining to men that their simplified, optimistic view of other men doesn’t line up with the experience of women and girls trying to dodge sexual harassment, assault and abuse attempts." - Leslie Morgan Steiner

He's no fan of music Not even the bluesiest He cares not for museums He thinks they're the snooziest He can't make smalltalk He's just not the shmooziest He’s awful with women Even the flooziest He loves only one thing And of that he's the choosiest He's

should you attempt to sweep me off my feet please put some plastic sheeting or a tarp down in case you drop me and i break open like a piñata my candied organs are extra gooey and no one needs that mess

omg they even ate the bones

I’m not so much chiseled as hammered.

they should invent hairs that do not turn gray

If you open a starburst while you're eating a starburst, you'll never have to not be eating a starburst

For years I worked and managed a local boutique wine shop. We had an older man who came into the store a handful of times each year, and as the years rolled by, we noticed his cognitive decline. It was never too severe, until one day, it was. On an ordinary day he walked in and approached the 🧵

Most doctors don’t realize when they weigh you the scale doesn’t subtract its own weight from the reading. Plus a lot of those things probably weigh like 30 pounds. That’s just bad science.

In my Bothered Era.

sourdough toast + butter = meal of champions

“i’m still punk” i whisper to myself as i turn down the music in my car so i can see better

Look at this face

I have done more research for social media posts than I ever did in my 15 years of college."

never ask your girlfriends dad if you can get married, cause he might say yes and then it takes forever to get divorced from him

"Grok: The Cybertruck of AI"

Yes, he knew he was a good boy. But how good?

You can tickle the penguins And get them to laugh You can just sing a song To amuse the giraffes Just a little soft-shoe Will delight the woodchucks But try as you might You can’t

This is Wiley. He has never seen snow before and wants to make sure he gets a real good look at it. For science. 12/10 (IG: smileywileydog)

Sweetest thing I've seen in a while 😍😘

23 FEBRUARY 1776, BOSTON: The redcoat officers’ amateur theatric company perform the play The Wonder of Wonders at Faneuil Hall. John Rowe describes the performance as “generally approved of.”

Providence just destroyed the record books. 37.9 inches of snow, crushing the Blizzard of 78 by more than 9 inches. The largest storm in Rhode Island history and the highest snowfall ever recorded at an I-95 Northeast climate site. And it is still lightly snowing.

Is it cars? I bet it’s cars.

later, coming back from recesses, he rushed over to hold my hand as we walked to their classroom. It's really sweet when a kiddo wants to hold your hand so they can feel safe, and you gently get them where they need to go I never knew I liked kids, but this is one of my favorite things in life now

pretty soon he felt better. he showed me a trick of pretending to twist his thumb around, so I showed him the disconnecting-thumb-tip trick, and he was shocked, and I showed it was a trick, and he wanted me to repeat it that and just being a strong, safe adult who cared, really helped him feel okay

a sub was mean to the first-grade class I was working with today, when they had the kids on Friday I was supporting their teacher with the kids today, and they were distraught, and one was on the edge of tears later, the latter kiddo saw me, got an idea of who I am, and wanted me to sit with him.

actually had a great day at work, working in classrooms that most american teachers wouldn't dare stay in for an hour but it's a good school: the kids aren't aggro and basically listen & respect authority but it's only relatively easy for me because I've been doing this for years & I am determined

The thought for the day today is a famous quote by baseball legend Ted Williams: "God gets you to the plate, but once you're there you're on your own". It highlights personal responsibility and individual performance in the clutch.

Credit to Celinastuff #Newfoundland #Canada 🤪🤣 ❄️ 🍁💪🏻🇨🇦 Over 100 cm fell, up to 150 cm in other areas

so the president called the men’s hockey team to congratulate them on their gold and joked that he “had to invite the women too” and they all laughed boisterously and I’m just gonna double down on my previous statement of fuck those guys

If I was pope which I am not because I’m merely a nasty woman with an opinion , I’d excommunicate JD Vance

When you actually understand and watch hockey...