For the Daily Beast, I contemplate borrowing England's king until we can figure out what the hell is going on. www.thedailybeast.com/maybe-americ...

Thank you and I love you, @esglaude.bsky.social

Brand new BALLROOM edition of Have I Got News For Your Ears. www.youtube.com/watch?si=Jiy...

Brand new BALLROOM edition of Have I Got News For Your Ears. www.youtube.com/watch?si=Jiy...

I really, really hope people go to jail over this. (They won't)

"why do we operate from the position that political violence is unacceptable, but run-of-the-mill gun violence is just something we have to live with?" More from @michaelianblack.bsky.social open.substack.com/pub/michaeli...

"Why is the conversation about a ballroom instead of the fact that forty thousand plus Americans lose their lives to guns every single year? Why are we, again, focused on the ills of rhetoric rather than the impact of rounds?" michaelianblack.substack.com/p/one-act-of...

The criteria for impeachment is NOT whether the Senate votes to remove him from office. The criteria for impeachment is high crimes and misdemeanors. Has he committed high crimes and misdemeanors? Then the House's job is to impeach. Taking that off the table is dereliction of duty.

He's 80 and the thing on his hand is spreading to whatever's left of his brain. Facts are facts. That boy gonna die.

In case you missed it, I solved our gun violence problem.

"Jeffries says he will not do his job is Dems win House majority."

So maybe the president should have gone through the proper channels, made his case, and asked Congress for funding instead of hiring a crew to tear down the East Wing after promising it would be untouched?

Big SNL Featured Player Who Gets Fired After a Single Season During the Show's Intro energy here

Things are bad when Hootie & the Blowfish are making political statements.

BUILD A BALLROOM AT INDIANA UNIVERSITY STAT!!!

Chief of Protocol for the White House: "God wants Trump dead."

Such an important piece that I wrote.

"The 'More Ballrooms, Fewer Doors' solution is the only practical, realistic plan I’ve heard to deal with the otherwise intractable problem of Americans’ easy access to weapons of mass destruction." michaelianblack.substack.com/p/make-ameri...

I hate to say it, but they're right. The way to solve this nation's epidemic of gun violence is to construct more ballrooms.

Russell Brand on Piers Morgan is the most cringe-inducing thing I've watched since the original "The Office."

Super rare and I certainly never expected to find it at a record store going out of business sale.

Motherfucking "the rule of law is holding" should not be headline-worthy in these United States.

The US has never not violated the Geneva Conventions in wartime since their passage in 1949. So why do we feign outrage at the thought of either Trump violating them, or other nations doing the same? michaelianblack.substack.com/p/war-crimes...

This showed up on my YouTube homepage. I have no idea what this is and no memory of shooting it. But I liked it! www.youtube.com/watch?v=DKeB...

This remains unacceptable.

Yes, I 100% agree. FULLY illiterate. Which is why I didn't pretend to know something I do not.

OPINION | If there’s a Trump administration candidate for “Most Likely to Wind Up Sleeping in Their Car,” it’s Kash Patel, writes @michaelianblack.bsky.social.

For the Daily Beast, I broke down the K$H Patel brouhaha AND predicted his future. www.thedailybeast.com/kash-patel-s...

Wake me up when it affects the world’s average condom maker

Yesterday, I sat down to write something funny and scathing about our FBI Director but could not quite muster the requisite venom. Today, I wrote this. michaelianblack.substack.com/p/my-brother...

Heidecker wrote this, didn't he?

Look, I've been there. I'm not 100% sure he's wrong.

A NEW episode of #HIGNFYE is live! We discuss: The latest news on Kash Patel and what role JD Vance is playing in Iran negotiations and Trump reads the bible? All of this and more! Don’t miss an episode! Follow us on Apple, Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts and vodcasts.

"We were given bootstraps and told to pull. If we failed to rise, it had nothing to do with the impossibility to hoisting one’s self off the ground and everything to do with a failure to defeat that which cannot be overcome alone." michaelianblack.substack.com/p/the-crass-...

Brand new "Mike and Tom Eat Snacks" out today. This one's a real head-scratcher! matescast.com

Probably no security risks there.

Damnit, I just posted this joke. Bradley beat me to it.

Perfect that they scheduled it during Happy Hour.

EXACTLY!

At least one American export remains unaffected by Trump's disastrous policies.

"As the sun fades, we fetch sweatshirts and discuss whether or not we’re going to have dinner. Sometimes si, sometimes no. If we do have a nighttime meal, it’s light. Maybe some salad or a little pasta. Or, as I ate last night, 35 Italian cookies." michaelianblack.substack.com/p/remain-in-...

Sometimes in the middle of the day, I'll just shout out random words and my wife will say, "Spelling Bee?" and I'll say "Spelling Bee" before dashing out of the room to get to the puzzle.

Serious question: have these killings had any effect on illegal drug use/supply/price? Or is this just murder porn?

Netflix's "Untold: Chess Mates" is Marty Supreme for chess. Watching now and loving it.

"In our lightspeed culture, those who place themselves into our collective conscience for whatever reason strike us as worthy of our attention for as long as they manage to keep us titillated." michaelianblack.substack.com/p/corey-feld...

Ok, but did these so-called “experts” have Jared on their team? Didn’t think so. Checkmate, libs.

Want more HIGNFY? Check out even more Best of Season 4 moments and HIGNFY EXTRAS on our YouTube. Link in bio to check it out!

And you idiots thought Hegseth was this administration's biggest drunk.

How did he age 60 years in 20?

"In Italy, whatever must be done today can be just as easily done tomorrow. And if it can be done just as easily tomorrow, why not two weeks hence?" michaelianblack.substack.com/p/these-flor...