wargen
@funeralpig.bsky.social
📤 12788
📥 436
📝 745
intruder
i’m on the altar guiding your knife hand saying “it’s okay i want this too”
about 1 hour ago
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everybody is meeting up under the bridge do you still have those fireworks
about 1 hour ago
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i must not allow fear to make itself a guest in my home
about 1 hour ago
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reposted by
wargen
Math Liker
about 13 hours ago
I had the Grinch over to my house to watch the Super Bowl last night. He actually has insane ball knowledge, he played in high school I think. Really interesting guy. Unfortunately he stole like 6 pounds of deli meat out of my fridge so I don't think I'm going to invite him back.
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i’ve been making bargains with sinister forest creatures
2 days ago
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baby i got you this
3 days ago
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detective: so you’re just out walking in the woods alone and you stumble on this body? me: yes sir worst thing i ever saw in my life detective: do you mind me asking what you were doing in the woods? me: (inaudible) detective: can you speak up son? we're recording. me: chasing a leprechaun
3 days ago
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4 days ago
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i am bart
5 days ago
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5 days ago
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you can just give yourself a pass for all the embarrassing things you did in the past, no one else is going to give it to you because they don't remember you doing them
6 days ago
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no baby i think it's great that you love all this stupid shit
6 days ago
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pov you’re the new person getting walked past my cubicle at work
7 days ago
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electronic music should make you feel like you're being hunted by a supernatural beast in the jungle
7 days ago
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alien trying to fit in by starting a manosphere podcast: these hoes only want one thing... mineral-rich soil to take back to their dying planet
7 days ago
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texting my mom: thank you for the article about cats i love you and appreciate you texting my dad: new evidence of aliens, check youtube texting Dr. Pepper: i'm pregnany
7 days ago
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what does it mean when the groundhog won’t come out of the hole and you hear a single gunshot from inside
8 days ago
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the moon is telling me to do credit card fraud
9 days ago
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your honor… (gestures at prosecutor and makes jerk off motion)
10 days ago
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every single moment must be lived
10 days ago
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11 days ago
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12 days ago
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the purpose of all creatures is to scuttle about to and fro
13 days ago
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yeah man
13 days ago
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hey guys listen i thought about it and i’m going to go out into the unnatural fog, i have shit to do
13 days ago
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when i run out of things to talk to my therapist about we do donuts in the parking lot
13 days ago
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sitting on the curb by the gas station eating an 8 pack of edible panties
13 days ago
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going down to the crypt to kiss each one of the bats goodnight
14 days ago
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i don’t feel like going down into the crypt tonight i don’t care what lurks there
15 days ago
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i love everything except all the bad stuff and i hate everything except all the good stuff
17 days ago
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love a wild woman who lives deep in the woods and is rumored to eat children
17 days ago
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what it feels like to do mushrooms with the homies
17 days ago
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(making small talk with Sisyphus) that thing heavy? looks heavy
17 days ago
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18 days ago
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running around a dead mall at 2am with a sword
19 days ago
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reading a book in the dark by firing a gun over it
19 days ago
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british guy: i hope americans are ready to be hated lib american reply: i'm so ashamed of my countrymen, i hope that the british don't hate me specifically Hamburglar: i haven't stolen anything since i got sober
19 days ago
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small lion sleeps in man’s lap
20 days ago
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me and my therapist just kind of shrugging at each other
20 days ago
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i'm a normal person, i call myself a shitposter in my 40's, i have a script that tells me when someone blocks me, i only post during peak engagement hours, these are normal healthy behaviors
20 days ago
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doctor spent the entire appointment just shaking his head at my circumstances
20 days ago
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inflexible trees break in the storm playboy you must bend like a reed in the wind
21 days ago
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