wargen
@funeralpig.bsky.social
📤 11625
📥 481
📝 14148
intruder
posting the six dumbest things i can think of and then going to bed
about 5 hours ago
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my head hurts and i don’t drink water and i vote
about 5 hours ago
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this roleplay won’t feel authenticate until you spend a couple weeks shadowing my sister
about 5 hours ago
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i don’t care what anyone says it feels good to do drugs and not go to work
about 5 hours ago
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a man should only love two people: his wife and his mother, if he loves anyone else he’s ran through
about 5 hours ago
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yeah i can sleep without a nightlight but it’s scary and i don’t want to
about 5 hours ago
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the underwear on the bottom of the hamper are cleaned by the weight and pressure of the clothes on top of them
about 5 hours ago
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SATURDAY NIGHT!
1 day ago
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reposted by
wargen
cop: did he send any texts around the time of the crash? cop 2: he sent a post that reads “padding my three track album with 26 skits and interludes” cop: not bad but it ain’t going viral cop 2: posting isn’t just about going viral cop: (sighs) not this shit again
10 days ago
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reposted by
wargen
17 days ago
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go ahead and take your bath on me i don’t give a shit anymore
2 days ago
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tactical gel for masturbating
2 days ago
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going to bed after a long day of doing jack shit
2 days ago
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when it came into the light its limbs were all in the wrong places
2 days ago
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drunk dudes will yell some crazy shit while they’re fighting “you know i lived with my grandparents when i was a kid” alright man you’re working through something i get it
2 days ago
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guinea pigs make some cute ass cartoon noises
2 days ago
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whoa playboy you just got slime on me
2 days ago
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thom yorke voice: i’m just hamster trapped in your treadmill
2 days ago
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post yourself from a different dimension
3 days ago
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i don’t care about posting anymore and i’m making it your problem
3 days ago
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system at work is down for an upgrade so the next two days i will be playing my steam deck and watching youtube videos
3 days ago
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sitting down to piss so i can floss and pet my cat
3 days ago
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it's a shame group chats don't exist here i enjoyed leaving them
3 days ago
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i absolutely hate those buzz balls commercials get that shit out of my face
3 days ago
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they are putting personalized cult leaders on your phone now this is a thing we should be putting billions of dollars into
add a skeleton here at some point
3 days ago
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Enchanted Forest my ass i just got gutshot with a crossbow by an anthropomorphic toad and family of foxes pissed on me
3 days ago
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"it's football folks" - new catchphrase
3 days ago
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hey let me live motherfucker i just wanna live
3 days ago
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reposted by
wargen
SHREW
3 days ago
Ideally they would live in separate rooms and interact solely through whispers into the dividing wall.
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reposted by
wargen
little lamb
3 days ago
Healthy relationships need one person who smokes weed all day every day and one person who can never ever smoke weed again even once. Sometimes there are a bunch of other people too, no judgment
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reposted by
wargen
farner
3 days ago
she wanna ride it for free like im zohran mamdani
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3 days ago
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in high school i had BIG IDEAS so i bought fabric paint and made a shirt that said PLASTIC PEOPLE MELTING IN THE HEAVENS on the front and BEWARE OF SALVATION GOD IS NO LONGER WATCHING on the back and wore it to school
3 days ago
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reposted by
wargen
farner
3 days ago
I need ozempic for my ass it looks like im smuggling pumpkins in these jeans
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hey man don't write 666 that's not cool that's actually evil
3 days ago
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babe i don't want to get up will you give me my Trulicity shot
3 days ago
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reposted by
wargen
Horny Robot
3 days ago
Breaking news—I’ve destroyed my family following years of selfish, destructive behavior
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if you wish to attract people you must be a light and if when those people get close and realize it is a false light leading them into the rocks so their precious cargo can be stolen then that's kind of on them
3 days ago
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three eggroll dinner
3 days ago
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nice soul bro truly wretched
3 days ago
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i'm the guy who decides what posts get tagged as rude on bluesky and i cannot tell you how many monocles i go through in a day
3 days ago
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my nesting partner was sucked into a jet engine and came out the other side as soup
3 days ago
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reposted by
wargen
snake god worshipper: you here to worship the Snake God? me: shit this isn’t the Divine Mouse temple? snake god worshipper: not even close, man
10 months ago
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reposted by
wargen
ceej
over 1 year ago
LIGHTNING MCQUEEN: Hey there little buddy, why don’t you come up front here so we can snap that photo you paid for? ME: (trying to look inside his passenger-side window to see if there’s a brain or something in there) Uh-huh, big fan.
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forever persecuted for being myself
4 days ago
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on the jury muttering “oink oink oink” every time a cop is testifying
4 days ago
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i don't like it when a song sounds like circus music but if i am at the circus i keep this kind of thing to myself
4 days ago
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reposted by
wargen
BesmirchedFinancier
9 months ago
peeing at the urinal with my pants pulled all the way down to my ankles and my shirt pulled all the way up to my nipples
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reposted by
wargen
sky
4 days ago
RFK Jr: You know, if someone… collapses in front of you the best course of action is… to leave immediately, because their soul just… came out and it’s flying around the room looking for a new… vessel at that point
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this is what i looked like when i was telling my mom i was not practicing wrestling moves on my little brother
add a skeleton here at some point
4 days ago
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