I weigh myself fully naked. If you don't like it, you can go to a different Publix.

BREAKING: Millions of files related to Jeffrey Epstein suggest the existence of a 'global criminal enterprise' that carried out acts meeting the legal threshold of crimes against humanity, a panel of independent experts appointed by the UN Human Rights Council says

I've already memorized your license plate (flirting)

ʜᴇᴀʟɪɴɢ 🕊️💙 📸 mine

I wonder what JD Vance looks like under his human suit.

[my hair holding a tiny suitcase]: hey man i'm moving to your back

Break my heart not my mind, bro

losing followers, gaining worshippers

She was rare, like a billionaire that isn't a pedophile.

Not to be too extra, but YouTube just force logged out the entire world tonight

Six backcountry skiers were found alive and 10 others were still missing Tuesday after an avalanche in Northern California during a powerful winter storm moving through the state.

My favorite bird, the white-breasted nuthatch, stopped long enough for me to get a picture. ❤️

We can’t sustain a society where wealthy people can get away with what the rest of us would be put to death for.

I put mine on Craigslist fuck it

Counterpoint: Don’t upload your medical records to any LLM. That’s fucking insane.

Insanity. They are laughing at us.

Tunies (circa 1957-circa 1967): A line of skinless, tuna fish-franks, meant to be eaten like hot dogs. They were the brainchild of William Lane, who developed them as a meatless option for Catholics, along with tuna cocktail weenies (Mar-Tunies) and tuna salami (Sea-Lomi)

hope y’all don’t mind if i post a little ass

Chums! Baby Dog here. Look what I found on my walk today! Some lovely Spring Flowers! Spring must be coming. Hurrah! What flowers are these? Who can tell me? 🌺

A complete list of my favorite gras: 1. Mardi 2. Foie

Alexa, skip this presidency

Bet you wanted to but ya' didn't.

I think I know what happens in my own heart. thanks tho.

Jean Harlow, Dorothy Burgess and Clark Gable in Hold Your Man (1933)

For anyone keeping track of the Iran buildup, we’ve now sent more AWACS into theater. Curious to see how tomorrow’s talks go, but it’s pretty clear the administration isn’t planning for them to be good.

Staying informed these days is a form of self harm.

shoot me from a cannon like one of your circus girls

I probably wouldn’t be alive if it weren’t for music. As a teenager it told me I wasn’t alone. This song, no reason…😒 youtu.be/lhLd18Xg6x0?...

why does no one ever send me a bouquet of puppies

Cocaine and Heroin were both originally brand names.

'and penalise those who dont'. What's that now

Sourdough is happening! No idea what to do with the basket thingy but we will figure it out. #Lola2.0

Epstein victim Virginia Giuffre: “I was trafficked to a lot of types of different men — billionaires, royalty… he used me as a form of blackmail so these people would owe him favors.”

wishful shrinking

It shouldn’t be harder for a woman to register to vote than a man…

😳 Domestic violence Revealed: The true toll of female suicides in UK with domestic abuse at their core😳 www.theguardian.com/society/2026... #UK #DomesticAbuse

For anyone who needs a picture of a portly dog in a robe

Kept romance alive by squirting a syrup heart on my wife's waffles yesterday.

I realize this blanket won't last forever. I treasure what time we have together NOW.

Leon Botstein, president of @bardcollege.bsky.social, has repeatedly made public statements about his relationship with the pedophile sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein that have turned out to be misleading, incomplete, or untrue. I'm going to make a thread to compile them all here.

Someone has sure already made this observation but the fact they can convert all those empty warehouses into prison camps means they could have converted them into housing, community centers, job training centers or, hell, libraries or schools all along. It’s always a matter of will not resources.

Police Ask For Public’s Help In Falsifying Report

my kindness hasn’t killed anyone so i’d like my money back pls.

My sanity belongs to a world I am no longer acquainted with.

I was born too late in the last century.

wishful shrinking

Dropped a little harmless knowledge on a post. The reception I got took me back to Twitter. Awesome. Bluesky has finally made it. I'll just fuck off now.