X: link to a racist substack about whether Finns have the correct haplogroups to be white Bsky: argument on if it’s racist to change emojis from the Simpsons color FB: guy who called you slurs in school posting a courthouse selfie with the caption “sometimes blood and family are different things”

should have taken some pictures. but i made a pretty bangin salmon shrimp chowder tonight.

Post a banger not in English youtu.be/BQV0TrlB0gA

post a banger not in English youtu.be/82Yf6ZN_LjQ?...

is it too late for turnings points usa to enter a racist dog into the puppy bowl

If you know me and you’ve got two minutes and 12 seconds.. well, then you get to watch a baby emu be physically hatched

People who think like this should only have the same rights as dogs. Like it shouldn’t be legal to harm them but they shouldn’t be able to do very many things

I hope I never humiliate my business / reputation and make a good man feel uncomfortable by getting carried away and licking his ear at the Houston Boat Show, but sadly there is no way to 100% prevent this from happening.

Taking some schadenfreude in the fact that JD Vance was a millennial “the Garden State soundtrack and Death Cab changed my life” guy and now he has to pretend to be excited about Kid Rock

thank you for the intrusive thought i needed to crappily photoshop

it’s lowkey pretty funny how republicans show no ability to distinguish between anyone else’s ideology. their idea of left-wing extremists are like pelosi & hillary. it leads to them saying amazing stuff like “we owned your hero, bill maher”

a genuine AI Herman Cain - right on your phone or tablet! fully authorized by his estate! dress him in one of hundreds of costumes! don't forget to feed him!

"When one fed attempted to blow off the crowd by visibly watching basketball highlights on his phone, a protester shouted “You’re watching ads, you broke bitch! Kill yourself!” The federal agent returned to his room shortly thereafter." crimethinc.com/2026/01/27/t...

this is not a ginuwine argument

You can tell from her face that he smells horrible but she’s trying to keep her composure

RIP Ea-Nasir you would’ve loved the 2026 economy

listen here you stupid leftoid, if you just voted blue in 2024, ICE would be ruining the lives of immigrant families quietly and efficiently in a way where we wouldn't have to hear about it on the news

they said “you must be this tall to terrorize your country”

Greg Bovino sadly filling one steamer trunk after another with elaborate fashy overcoats, the teargas canisters he always has bouncing around on him like labubus, and dozens of "chest-belts." They will be shipped ahead of him as he prepares to return to his home, which is a men's size 10 boot.

on his way to make love to your wife

it is DANGEROUS to doxx an ICE agent. it is IRRESPONSIBLE to protest outside the mouse hole where Greg Bovino is staying. it is INEXCUSABLE to reveal that he bathes in the hollow cap of an acorn with morning dew. I don’t CARE if you think it’s adorable he drives an apple to work

so ALL of these children just magically *have* orange slices after EVERY soccer game??? ok George Soros

more like you're getting your shit rocked by people who'd rather be coaching youth basketball, and you should be relieved that they just want to protect their neighbors. If this was actually an insurgency there would be about a thousand new ICE Erika Kirks every week

This is the single funniest excuse he could have come up with for not wanting to be booed in public

We are going to win

remember when a group of armed right wing militia members had a month-long standoff with federal agents in 2016 and then they were all acquitted? haha that was so crazy. anyway what were you saying about being armed and "obstructing federal agents"?

Huge scandal that Minneapolis has been crawling with terrorists this whole time. They've been living among us undercover as poets and nurses. And would've continued to, had it not been for the work of our bravest child kidnappers

This world could be so cool. There so much amazing technological advancements and there’s so many incredibly talented and unique people. But first we gotta kill dudes like Nick Fuentes

People can say they didn’t vote for this but people are liars

If dem leaders actually opposed ICE they would already be doing so. They oppose its aesthetics, not its principles.

“The captured toads will be stored in fridges and freezers to humanely kill them, before being sent to a local taxidermist.” The taxidermy toad market is in for a shock

taking trump seriously rn would be too damaging to a US in decline so the whole system is squirming to not look at him directly. press translating what he says to sound more sane, democrats just talking about eggs. he's too big to fail

My neck, my back,

"Famous Ultra-Wealthy Internet Sadist Makes Deal with Weirdo Cult for Weirdoes to Lower Marriage Ages" is a great headline to read if you're in the mood to stare forlornly out the window like Carole King for a few hours

Well now

the Mighty Saluda

Holy Jesus I didn't look close enough, saw the green logo quickly and thought this was The Onion and started chuckling man what have we done lol

baby beluga swam so wild and swam so free that now he’s leading a liberation army. he grew up and he has a rocket launcher now.

if i was amy klobuchar i would not be in politics i would be a car designer stunning the automotive world with my klobucar

Fox News Sends Trump Quarterly Tithe Of 3 Blond Anchors https://theonion.com/fox-news-sends-trump-quarterly-tithe-of-3-blond-anchors/

American conservatives will look you right in the eye with a straight face and tell you that complete and utter subservience to masked federal police is patriotism, anything else deserves being executed in the street, and tax dollars for healthcare is tyranny.

this is your mission. roll up to this daycare in full tactical gear to harass some kids and teachers. when you get spooked by your own shadow like a panicked horse and start shooting your gun, our pedophile president will call the person you shot a terrorist. good luck soldier