"I really resent that people have been telling me that my comedy lays the groundwork for real hate and violence and now I have to admit they were right all along"

I know people bristle at the idea of leftists who police language but a big reason it happens is because, especially as it relates to politicians, the language we choose serves as an entirely accurate predictor of the types of policy decisions we would make & who we would & wouldn’t place value on

I refuse to believe someone who worked for years as a professional comedian and writer who made one of the most culturally relevant sketch shows of all time is this naive about the power of the things you say onstage

A fun game to play is seeing how drunk I can get and still successfully self-administer my Ozempic. Turns out pretty drunk!

Take a brief walk with me: remember how Congressman Leo Ryan and 4 of his travel companions were murdered in Jonestown? What’s to stop these fuckers from firing on any and all Democrat legislators who pop up on them?

Japanese sci-fi: two robots in space, yearning American sci-fi: man gets the author's beliefs on polygamy confirmed by the aliens of ramalama IV french sci-fi: two horny bounty hunters visit the Galaxy of Breasts British sci-fi: nuclear war. Everyone dead. America's fault

The next president's Attorney General needs to act with urgency to investigate and prosecute the crimes being committed to effectuate the mass deportation agenda.

Give me a YouTube channel where I have to explain current updates on streamers like Sneako, Clavicular, and Johnny Somali to Sir Patrick Stewart

All the worst people in the country are enduring unprecedented levels of open hostility and violence as the country untethers and I think thats neat

The economy is fake. Everything about it. Smoke and mirrors all the way down.

Here's the conclusion of my free newsletter going out tomorrow, on the dangerous rhetoric spread by Sam Altman, Dario Amodei and Demis Hassabis. wheresyoured.at

My favorite Seinfeld episode was the one where they all just screamed. They went through motions and blocking like there was a plot, but all the dialogue was either just wordless screaming or stuff like "Oh dear God" and "God help us." I think it was in one of the later seasons.

there's no ableism to this. we've seen the damage a president proven to have dementia in office (Reagan). no one should be shamed for having dementia, but instead just receive help and support and understanding; but no one with dementia should be in charge of driving a bus, or running the country.

Side note this guy fuckin hates doctors, thinks they're all parasitic scum. Did a whole chapter in art of the deal about it. If he thought it was him as a doctor he would've slapped the intern who made it. There's lots of other, bigger reasons this is a lie, but this is also one.

This entire clip down to the "Trump Orders McDonalds" crawl at the bottom feels like a fever dream, you couldn't recreate the cultural and societal trajectory that created this moment if you tried for a thousand years

my gf just caught me googling "orgasm ending explained" after we had sex

A fact that sounds made-up is: There was a Dark Crystal prequel series on Netflix featuring the voices of Andy Samberg and Awkwafina which canonically revealed that the Skekses have three-headed penises. And it was REALLY FUCKING GOOD.

Lord, I see what you’ve done for others

"Why did you frighten my servant so?" asked the merchant. "I did not mean to frighten him, I was simply surprised to see him here in Baghdad, for I have an appointment with him this evening in Samarra," replied JD Vance.

BlueSky mods are awfully lax about these 60,000+ shitlib bot accounts that all follow each other, gas each other up, reskeet each other, and post the same goddamn shit right down to the exact wording, but the ol' banhammer sure has a hairpin trigger for leftists and Palestinians 🤔

JD Vance has done more to destroy fascism than any Democrat

so is it too early to talk about the fact that Iran’s military action in the straight has had a stronger impact on countries abandoning fossil fuels than any liberal think tank?

Here's the thing: Democrats already know who can win. They know which policies are popular with voters and which candidates are vocally in support of those policies. They're going to throw a billion dollars into trying to prevent those candidates from becoming the nominee.

The "Why didn't they come forward sooner?" question has been answered, time and time again, by victims and psychologists alike. There are myriad answers to this question, easily attainable for those with the genuine curiosity to learn. The people still asking this question are doing so in bad faith.

This is so fucking stupid we look like assholes

Houston used to have an awesome music festival called Free Press Summerfest, and another one in the fall called Day For Night. What happened was, the guy who ran it turned out to be a sex pest and huge fucking creep, and now we don't get to have those things anymore. Creeps ruin everything.

It’s particularly stunning when someone replies to you that they don’t believe x y and z women who have come forward about sexual violence and then you click their account and their bio says “women’s rights”

yea i feel like this is being glossed over?? like he’s admitted to at the very minimum being a creep, so why would you want him to be governor?

#Resist libs are doing the "we can expunge the rapists from the Democratic Party once we get dang Cheeto Drumpf out of the White House" talking point, just like we all knew they would

you consider the few things that have pushed these guys into action, and the many things that haven't, and increasingly coming to the conclusion that no matter what the issue you care about is, you need to jam up airports

Artemis crew looks great! Welcome home!

If you're not explicitly running on making examples out of Trump and his miserable crew, you don't have my vote, full fucking stop

People say we can't compare this to the Third Reich because of the atrocities but we only found out about the atrocities after the fact when it was all said and done and we're not done with this yet so I am sure the worst stomach churning shit has yet to be revealed.

new gender neutral bathroom just dropped

BlueSky moderation is just Calvinball

I swear, every single time I hear news about the Democratic candidates running for governor in California it's just like

"We all knew (Swalwell's dirty secret)" is a wild flex. Then why weren't you saying something? Helping the women come forward? Making it known in any way to anyone?

The exact same people who defended Franken and Cuomo (and Biden's genocide) are now defending Swalwell, because resist libs are incapable of having actual moral positions.

they are freaking out about losing the kids. this is why lately on every major news platform you cannot escape hearing about how a fucking twitch streamer is the devil. carpet bombing the airwaves

ME: Is beauty subjective or objective? Does it all come down to personal taste or are we forever beholden to society's beauty standards? TACO BELL CASHIER: Look, buddy, it's transient, shifting like water. ZENDAYA (in line behind me): He's right, it's a fluid reflection of generational zeitgeist.

israel is run by expansionist fascists who (correctly) see a lasting peace as the death of their cause, & they'll do anything to avoid it. it is so invested in domestic US politics because it can't afford a president who is willing to cut off aid or weapons. israel needs a forever war

Only 1/4 of the Democrats are calling for Trump to be 25'ed. I guess some of y'all are impressed by this? Maybe your expectations were low. Can't really blame you for that. But I'm not satisfied with 1/4 of an opposition party and I don't think you should be, either.

genuinely think people outside of America don't realize how big this place is, how militarized and murderous our police are, how little our politicians care, how disconnected and impoverished we have been intentionally made to be, how we still have slavery just with extra steps. we really suck gang

I think it's wrong to launch women into space because we need more women here on earth

Call Congress and tell them to do their job: 202-224-3121

Daredevil being The Devil of Hell's Kitchen is hilarious when you know how tiny Hell's Kitchen is. Spider-Man has to swing all the way across all five boroughs of New York City every day, and then here's Matt Murdock micromanaging the shit out of 8 square blocks of lower Manhattan

Yeah so he is just going to keep doing the thing where we are in a constant state of uncertainty, confusion, stress, and tension because that is what abusive people do and the people who are in a position to address this are asleep at the switch.

in persian culture, telling someone "we're going to kill you all" is considered deeply offensive