Can anybody tell me the best way to jump off a building? Like, does a sick ass gainer reduce the regret before I hit the pavement?

remember those fucking commercials from like the 80’s or 90’s, don’t remember what the product was exactly, but it showed someone hacking open a sugarcane in a sugarcane field and then just pouring straight sugar crystals out of it like sand? what the fuck was that

Change a movie by adding a word Spanking Bad Girls

I don't understand the appeal of chicken wings. Like, here's some spicy bones, you'll need a shower afterwards.

Oof! Different greatness. I've shared Monk quite a lot. Whereas 'tis easy to pass over AT's divinity as "that old stuff". In fact it's dextrous, ingenious mastery. The miracle of Monk is star fruit, raspberry & pineapple, Tatum is dragon fruit, tangerine & pomegranate. Both incomparable, peerless.

I put the "fun" in "funeral"

3 (C) Tatum - cf. 3 A & B! @walks30.bsky.social @te-kanawa.bsky.social @steveprime.bsky.social @simonperkins.bsky.social @sandrojanssen.com @rogerday.bsky.social @rickmclaughlin.com @richardbellavance.bsky.social @pnwdreadpirate.bsky.social @pascalr57.bsky.social @oldnavyguy.bsky.social

I put the “deli” in “psychedelic”

I put the "wee" in "sweet"

the US almost pulled off an amazing comeback don't you dare blame Henley hats off to Europe well played

if medbed is real you have to tell me first and i get first dibs

I put the "aw" in "awkward"

i put the "he" in "pathetic"

A thread re: my green thumb. (1/4) I don’t know if you guys remember my big plant that Pom Pom liked to lie in so I found pictures-

My wife when I clean the house, make dinner and tell her she's pretty.

Change a movie by adding a word: Fight Club Sandwich

who up wishing they had a wishing well to kiss and tell

TMZ are reporting that 60% of sandwiches are just bread with lies inside.

Change a movie by adding a word: Evil Dead Clams

Change a movie by adding a word: Throw Mama From The Soul Train

Time to catch up on the News of the Day 🛌

I don't need a screen time report, I need a cat time report so I can improve

did you guys know that just 2 marijuana joints can contain more concentrated THC than one

i love yawl hope you know that

20 🎉 #art #birthday

Hey guys! Give this wonderful human a follow for their birthday 🥳❤️🥳

just throwing some skeets out there like a lost soul who needs new coordinates sh!t is fvcked

ducks win? oh snap

And although I have MANY issues with the late Mr Jackson.. ‘Billie Jean’ is still the best song about false paternity law suits ever written.

one of the shoes

chase car tires bite the mail person take a dump in the weirdest spot be a dog

Just found out my friend gets $700 for casual sex. Meanwhile, my pussy’s been running at a loss since 2003.

mac tonite lookin moon oh the shark babe

Change a movie by adding a word: Debbie Does Dallas Renos

Reminder to NFL fans: early morning game tomorrow from Dublin.

Instead of doing laundry, I am saving time by sewing my own clothes from discarded draperies I found in the dumpster behind HomeGoods

my daughter got some shoes from my sister for the upcoming Paris trip she asked what i thought of them Billie Jean Doc Martins hee hee

Change a movie by adding a word: Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Ass Bomb

Change a movie by adding a word: Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close Farts

Change a movie by adding a word: Glory Holes

props to Oregon for not wetting the bed in happy valley 2nd half soon come

The proper way to wrap your Weiner.

please try and include actual text and helpful information in your alt text. just writing your personal thoughts on what the photo is or isn’t helpful to anyone. Don’t just say “this is shitty” say *what* it is, what the text is if there is any, what people in the photo are doing, etc.. come on.

Change a movie by adding a word: Gleaming The Rubik's Cube

Change a movie by adding a word: Mission Impossible Whopper

@pcsoblahdeehell.bsky.social remember the photo you posted asking if i knew the drummers? this has to be where that was taken what a lovely tribute to a giant of a player 🙂

At 70K followers I will fist fight Paul

Don’t let them fool you, Cracker Barrel still woke.

"suspect is wearing an REI shirt and is riding a bike" good luck narrowing that down in Portland