it is, tuesday

ment oint ment oint ment oint

I haven't had the capacity to keep up with moderation lists for a bit, but this one is really obvious, so I'm stealing some energy from Future Me: a list for the extremely obvious wave of inauthentic accounts following today's newly-created US gov accounts bsky.app/profile/did:...

Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish and he can go fish for himself. Now while he's away fishing you and his wife can start doing all the mouth stuff you've been texting each other for months about. But oh no! He's home early with many fish! You taught him too well!!!

You know the season is changing when you linger a while by the warmth of the rotisserie chicken display

that autumnal feeling www.gallerygerard.com/the-art-of-a...

can't drink coffee anymore so i take caffeine pills call them my, diuresis pieces

Given that this government has imprisoned a Luigi and a Mario, it's only appropriate that it creates a Department of Wario

the easiest way to change the world is to destroy it. thats why we here at fuck all of you industries have made the torment nexus

today is international raccoon appreciation day and please feel free to begin

thinking about how the currency of love is time & time is limited

just opened a fortune cookie and it screamed in agony

It’s a shame world class fencers don’t get to kill a guy even one time

I’d love to join your resistance but until we have earthquake proof bridges I can’t even cross the river. How soon do you think your resistance is going to have those

[at my second rodeo] listen up you ignorant sack of shit

These beans giving me a congenital fart defect smh

Ultimately, we're all looking for the same thing: a horse who solves crimes

Not everyone you meet is going to like you. You need to accept that those people are hideously ugly

Atlas Hugged by Kind Rand haha we're just having fun here

Just wondering if anyone would have sagely scolded my ancestors in the camps if they said "Fuck Germany." Would you have called them bigots or said "Yeah the camps are bad but Germany has a right to exist?"

normalize saying "this guy knows what I'm talking about" and pointing at strangers on the bus

The Spanish kinda nailed it with their version of lefty loosy righty tighty: la derecha oprime y la izquierda libere the right opresses, and the left liberates

“angry concubine incites hatred against kingdom’s minorities” is a tale as old as time, huh

Too late, Batman. Once this Tylenol floods the city's water supply, my wiki won't run out of editors ever again

theseus gradually replacing the pieces of that dam boat as a fun thought experiment

One reason I do not think Trump is going to create a 1,000 year reich is because he failed to cancel a middling funnyman and immediately pivoted to trying to outlaw not having a headache.

It's so funny to watch guys like Miller and Vance smugly pretend to be badass tough guy intellectuals while their sole job is being this demented old moron's capering house kittens.

No! YOU are the worst at witty retorts

sometimes all we can do is keep putting one hand in front of the other. do not despair. rather, hope all things. kierkegaard

it's called bitcoin because it's joke money

they're feeding him his favourite canned spaghetti

If I ever die I demand to be sent to the infinite bhuna realm

those beautiful naked women have made a compelling argument i am going to steer this ship into the rocks

batshit crazy. you should have to provide explicit consent to the use of ai on you in any capacity let alone medical

cryptowaffles for breakfast again :((

marco rubio trying to impose sanctions on brazil but he can't because his propeller beanie keeps falling off and getting caught in his tricycle

and does the thing with apostrophe's

rule by the person who can do the best skateboard tricks, call that an olliegarchy

[ancient egyptian standup comic] see guys from the upper kingdom, they observe funerary rites like THIS. but us guys from the lower kingdom, we observe funerary rites like THIS. See this guy knows what I’m talking about [pointing at man with the head of a bird]

Babylon 5 spinoff series called Ur 1750, it's all about a stranded alien in ancient Sumeria attempting to disguise himself as a humble and honest human copper merchant

"we have asked them to stop being floppy" may well be the best thing you read all weekend

love dropping shit on the floor when i’m drunk welcome to gravity idiot

in contrast to hegel's conception of the weltgeist, the collective consciousness of humanity that drives history, i believe history is driven by the collective displeased remnants of the angry dead, a polterweltgeist, if you will

The Department of Lethal Warfighters who Fight Kickass Wars and Have Big Dicks

alone! in the discord

thinking is like posting in your mind

Me: bud can you stop eating grass please My dog, who has no concept of “eating,” only the constant exchange of sustenance and energy among all living things, not least of which, the unassuming blade of grass, which in its humility, communes directly with the sun: 🙂 ?