i mean if it was a 1-time thing then yeah people would be more sympathetic, but the guy has made mistake after mistake, and then shit all over anyone who criticized or critiqued him.

my last name is longcock btw

my wife works in a hospital, and she told me she was prepping for a surgery on a 15 year old boy with down syndrome. she was saying to the boy “c’mon buddy, hop up in this bed for me” and the boy looked at her and said “yeah, you wish, baby!!” and he burst out laughing. he got her ass.

if you’re one of the lead developers of a website and every decision you make gets so much negative feedback that you have to mass block your entire user base, you don’t have haters, you’re just doing a really bad job.

[public apology] “i am sorry that my dick and balls were sent to several unsuspecting users, but to be fair, i put Claude in charge of handling my notifications, my dms, and the entirety of my photo albums, so to be fair, it’s not really my fault. Ai is the future.”

LMAO AND ALSO, ROFL

making an OnlyFans but it’s just my fat ass rolling around, struggling to get out of bed in the morning.

[pops out of your mailbox] “whats up you fucking dickhead”

well Sydney Sweeney said that lgbtq shouldn’t be in movies for kids, which is fucked Up; but she also has big titties ,, so it’s kinda hard to say for sure whether she’s canceled or not .

boofed of the loud pack, smoking twin towers, that 9/11 kush

someone who sexually fetishizes canadians is called a chehser

“a black”

You’re a Loser. Hasan is a Loser, Welcome To Hell. Respond to me.

Optimus prime shitting himself mid transform into a car: "fuck, FUCK"

i got my dick blown off in a practice war, so you’re basically shaming a veteran. i hope you’re ashamed. stop pointing at it and laughing. i’m a hero.

in case anyone was curious, this is what i was responding to (first picture), and then this was their reply (2nd picture)

Don’t think I will ever be as happy as when I was 11, playing online Flash games on my grandma’s computer that were all called like, Don’t Let Wendy Find the Thermometer

hey i see you went swimming at your favorite lake this weekend

dont send me some AI bullshit. fuck off.

welp, my bot is gay

always check in on your friends, they may be struggling @cockremover.bsky.social

“germs dont exist because you can’t see them” by that logic then neither does the clitoris. checkmate, females.

i love making new friends online

working in the woodshop and i found an unopened box. there’s a working microwave in here. no longer eating lunch cold at work anymore for me!!!’

lunch today, very excited

When I got the call I said, wow, it's Tim Onion (Collins!) calling, how big is that? I was very impressed with myself to have the head of The Onion calling to "kiss my ass."

When I got the call I said, wow, it's Tim Apple (Cook!) calling, how big is that? I was very impressed with myself to have the head of Apple calling to "kiss my ass."

women love when you walk up to them, stare them directly in the eyes and say “i have a banana in my pocket and also i’m extremely happy to see you.” and then walk away .

Oh you just made me read a post of yours that was written with ChatGPT? It would be a shame if I killed myself in my house and you never found out or was ever even aware of my existence

[i drop my phone behind my bucket full of my collectable swords, blades pointing upwards] “dang, i dropped my phone!” [ i bend down to grab my phone and several of the swords impale my stomach and chest] arrrughhhh i’ve been impaled by my collection of swords, ghlugghhh…”

there are some people that are so fucking strong that they can literally lift cars and pull buses, and then there’s be who’s allergic to over-the-counter allergy medications

my posts are like a viral meme stock. very volatile, theres good days and bad days, a few people might benefit a bit, but 98% of you are gonna be very disappointed. also i took $5,000 from your uncle.

You’ll be hearing from my lawyer (horny)

when “it” does finally happen. what do you think the cause of death will be? my guess is he chokes on a KFC chicken bone.

I hate it when the joke is on me. How dare you.

so he lied

Henry VII overdosed on weed, confirmed

if i was on InfoWars i would immediately start by debunking veganism and discussing how the number of genders directly correlates with the amount of crime in this country. i’m pretty sure i’d be a hit.

based on my study (sample size, two women) all women want to be crushed into cubes

you call me a human pet Guy, but you guys do not acknowledge my achievements! i spent Years in my parents basement, angrily attacking other people for their beliefs, uploading hundreds of documents glorifying my work. you must understand. Reddit loves me !!

this guy is a walking meme. the fact that he willingly wears a fedora or some sort of top hat is just icing on the cake.

i am becoming quite exhausted of the daily grind of life. i’m 31 and my body is slowing down already. manual labor is so physically taxing.

ah yes, Michael Knowles, the most manly, straight cis man to ever live

Dunkin iced coffee: obtained ✅

wait where are dutch people from