It’s only Panic™ if it’s at the disco. Otherwise it’s just sparkling terror.

every room can be a panic room if you only believe

Panic! at your current location.

I can’t afford a fancy panic room, I have to panic where ever I am, like some kind of peasant

Title of my autobiography

Still lovin you, Scorpions. Please advise.

Tell me every terrible thing you ever did, and let me love you anyway” - Edgar Allan Poe Me:

emotional support taquitos

a word cloud that’s just says fuck in varying sizes

See a Fox? Post a Fox!

Cause of death: misquoted misquotes

I still want to ride my bicycle, Queen. Please advise

Disappointed I didn’t get a MyChart Wrapped this year

Damn, boy, are you a WebMD search? Because this started off innocent and now I think I'm dying.

Feels like an add more people to my notifs day. Hehe (rubs hands together)

Pedicures for the missus and me. But not for thee. 😂

They say money can’t buy happiness but poverty can’t buy anything

A "just for fun" Sunday post... art and life inspire each other

2026 feels like that time we all agreed to meet at the 24-hour diner after the bar closed, only to find out the diner was also closed.

It’s a Clicktatorship.

Whoever said “Out of sight, out of mind” never lost track of a spider in their bedroom.

There is something very attractive and sexy about a woman who appreciates donuts.

my how the alcohol bottles at Costco have grown 😯 and Hennessy “Very Special”?! are we even trying anymore.

Cause of death: forgot to add alt text

ME: what’s the worst that could happen? UNIVERSE: *cracks knuckles*

Today’s band name: The Cautious Knees

what do you say we turn this house of Guinness into a home of Guinness

if at first you don’t succeed, settle down and take a nap. you gave it your best shot champ

… me, leaving 2025 behind 😨…..

me: *suffering* the universe: im not touching you im not touching you im not touching you im not touch

Today’s band name: The Tiger Jaws

in recognition of your honorable deeds and service to the realm have a cookie 🍪

If I want to see “Stranger Things” I’ll just go to the Discover tab

“Strangers Things” season 5’s “Shock Jock” clearly shows Erica Sinclair drinking an Ecto Cooler.. but they weren’t released until 1989 as a tie in to “Ghostbusters II” and yet chapter 5 is set in the fall of 1987. ITS COMPLETE HORSESHIT PEOPLE

2026 early review: Not bad so far

I wish burritos were in the fruit/vegetable categories

Today’s band name: Veil of Illusion or TV Keeps Us Going

New Year’s resolutions: 1) Eat healthier 2) Spend more time outdoors 3) Escape from the research facility

new year, new me. im Batman now

Happy Upside Down Day to those who celebrate

This is the longest last day of any secular year that ever was.

My 2025 New Year’s resolution was to lose 25 pounds. Only 30 pounds to go.

We need new shows like Breaking Bad

Going to pronounce macabre like macrame for 2026.

A group of men waiting in line for a haircut is called a Barbercue.