We can anthropomorphize any fucking thing. This crawfish actually looks distressed.

Christ, this is awful.

What a swell li'l guy.

40 years ago we’d have congressional hearings falsely accusing metal bands of putting backwards messages in their songs that told kids to kill themselves & now we have a planet-killing chatbot that’s all like “bet you won’t commit suicide chickenshit bitch” & the government is like here’s $5 billion

Sometimes I wonder how many billions of years it's been since there's been a sunny day on Venus.

Holy shit, he's actually telling the truth for once.

It's not the biggest thing, of course, but there's something fundamentally wrong with someone who only ever talks about dogs in a negative way.

Truth.

Apple TV promoting its latest show

Ok here's the thing about the carrier debate. Both sides are right and both sides are wrong (thread).

One of those days where the back pain is so bad that I look like a nine-and-a-half month pregnant woman when I sit down.

These dickholes are gonna drive me back into going to Mass, aren't they?

This is true, and it works for combination, timed, and magnetic locks as well as ones with keys.

Christ above. 1. No, no one is "worth" a trillion dollars. 2. THERE IS NO WAY IN HELL HE GETS THAT MONEY BECAUSE HE CANNOT MEET THE CRITERIA NECESSARY TO GET IT. It is as impossible as turning back time.

Always hated it when I was upset and my mum would say 'I'll give you something to cry about...' and then she'd make me watch The Green Mile.

It’s not a “class” war if it’s targeting Black and brown folks.

God I love a book that has four dozen endnotes by page 30.

Miso soup is also perfect for the healthy on crisp fall days.

This is the single most adorable thing you will see all month.

🚨 CHONKY SQUIRREL ALERT 🚨

On. Motherfucking. Wisconsin.

I don't know how to put this any differently, but if you want children to go hungry for any reason, you are a sick, twisted, EVIL sonofabitch and I hope you find no peace in this life or the next.

Look, this simply isn't true. Rhode Island and Hawaii both also had all counties go blue in 2024. Oklahoma, however, was the only state where all counties went red.

Did Uday Hussein come back from the dead to be this asshole's decorator?

Christ above.

GOOD. This is nonsense garbage that people have placed too much importance on for far too long.

BBC really burying the lede there

FIFA creating a "Peace Prize" to give Trump is so amazingly on brand for both FIFA and Trump that I can't even be mad.

This is an issue that Mississippi is actually good about, though not because of any progressive ideals. They just don't let men be guards at women's prisons. That and not letting vaccine exemptions exist for public schoolchildren (although I'm sure those dipshits are working to eliminate that).

I can't believe I'm saying this, but good on Mehmet Oz for responding the way he should have. THAT is how fucked-up this entire administration is. Even the barest sign of professional competence or empathy is praiseworthy.

That is to say: we, the people.

I see we have arrived at the "digital phrenology" part of the program.

This fucking ghoul celebrating the weight loss that will happen because 42 million people can't get SNAP. No peace in this life or the next.

This is a god-damned shame. If you know anyone who is feeling suicidal, talk to them and encourage them to get help. There are brighter days ahead.

We are in a golden age of bribery.

Oh you WANT to read this thread.

YES. THIS.

I tell people about white people in cities filling in their public swimming pools with cement rather than share them with their Black neighbors. If you were white and had money, you could get into private swim clubs. Those of us without money (yes, us honkies too) never learned to swim.

Put this motherfucker UNDER the jail.

So I just got to talk to Grandmaster Caz and Sha-Rock. That was cool.

The Warriors disappointed us so badly on Tuesday.

Sure it destroyed democracy, enriched the worst shitbirds in the world, erodes trust in each other, and is probably gonna make the economy that Jay Gould could only DREAM of, but at least we didn't have to remember our friends' birthdays for a few years there.

I don't know how to put this any differently, but if you want children to go hungry for any reason, you are a sick, twisted, EVIL sonofabitch and I hope you find no peace in this life or the next.

OK, as promised, here's my thread about the links between tear gas/pepper spray and the arms trade and gun industry.

Me only son.

My mother was the breadwinner in the family, first to get a college degree in the family, and when she was pregnant with me her boss came into her office, told her that she'd never be the same accountant again, and fired her on the spot. That was in nineteen eighty two

Look at this sorry motherfucker right here.

I could never be NYC's mayor because if I were, every night before bed I would walk around the mansion saying "good night, Gracie" until my staff had me sent to Guantanamo.

Holy shit, I think I was right! bsky.app/profile/paul...