This has always sounded like Sunday morning to me open.spotify.com/track/5oeNNi...

On Fridays we wear punk open.spotify.com/track/5y7Mok...

threw my back out pumping up the jam

i enjoy playing hard to get with reality

dance like everyone is watching and this is their punishment

When I go, don't get a priest - get a bartender. burn me up and sprinkle my shit in the garden so the vegetables are extra tasty

only the good die young so im pretty sure that means I’ll live to be a thousand

you don't have to explain yourself to the ones who genuinely see you

Terrified Adolis García Wondering If Anyone Else Can See Phillie Phanatic https://theonion.com/terrified-adolis-garcia-wondering-if-anyone-else-can-see-phillie-phanatic/

"If we give rich people even more money, maybe it'll overflow and some will fall into the hands of everyone else" is actually a pretty dumb argument when you say it directly.

Some of you are absolutely no fun.

The prospect of a humiliated narcissist with his finger on the nuclear trigger is chilling to say the least.

gm haters

Gas you up? In this economy??

EAT THE FUCK UP BUD!!! FLYERS FOREVER 🔥🔥🔥🔥

Still can. Go for it buddy

Jim Comey didn't kill himself.

Let’s all post it and see if they indict all of us.

There is so much hockey left man calm down

i do not fuck w meanies

Somebody needs a hug

can’t block the straight of Hormuz cant block a hotel lobby but can block Epstein files

I thought Axolotl was the name of that billionaire’s child.

Let’s make them cry

Go Flyers

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

respect to turtles for not being noisy

Heavily addicted to going on a little walk.

Just be happy. They hate that.

Every day is Earth Day, dumbass

Pittsburgh.

Just go watch the Flyers

FLYERS PLAYOFF HOCKEY IS ~12 HOURS AWAY THIS IS NOT A DRILL

I either too high for this bullshit or not high enough for this bullshit.

Go offff!!!! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

Damn girl are you a price tag on the bottom of a coffee mug? Cause I can't seem to get you off

My favorite kind of shit is funny shit.

Not all cries for help are loud. There’s a silent signal everyone should know. Thumb tucked. Fingers folded. It means “I need help” Share this please! You could be the one who sees her when she can’t say a word! #SheShed

feels like anytime someone says hey you could be president it’s an insult now

goofing around is really good for u. maybe even the best for u.

"If the only thing keeping a person decent is the expectation of divine reward, then brother, that person is a piece of shit."

I'll take the happy medium. Please.

FLYERS IN SIX FUCK YOU SID THESE BOYS GOT THE JUICE

BRICK. BY. BRICK.

I think we need to bring back public booing.

Blessed are the fucked up.

Round here we like our shenanigans the good ol’ fashioned way. Nonsensical, inclusive and with a dash of sexual innuendos.