Chicago Cubs get your act together.

Everyone is thinking of someone different and everyone is right

I imagine during rain delays that they have to physically hold Marsh back from running out like a Labrador and rolling around in the wet grass

He’s right, it IS a national security concern: I personally have a sort of H*rry P*tter magical cabinets situation in which I am revealing state secrets to China without leaving my house

The only thing that can stop a shooter is a good A.I. with a gun

What I look like watching MLB Big Inning

EDMUNDINGER NUMBER THREE

Did everyone there know they were buying tickets to the home run derby tonight or ….?

Delaware Valley dads: save some runs for the playoffs haha 😉

@John-Middleton I am in your walls

KYLE YOU ARE NOT OF THIS EARTH, YOU ARE A GOD

The crack off the bat from Kyle on the bomb must’ve been heard from space 🚀

Made a Korean beef bowl with gochujang-pickled cucumbers

Am I… *deep drawn out and labored rattling sigh* back in?

I imagine during rain delays that they have to physically hold Marsh back from running out like a Labrador and rolling around in the wet grass

I like to see all the white people in the crowd dancing off beat to Duran’s entrance That’ll be me in just a few weeks in Red October

These messy sloppy bitches

Yous didn’t get raptured? Couldn’t be me

Autism isn’t a problem to be solved, you ghouls

I’m really liking this stage of capitalism/American era where I’m too exhausted all of the time so I’m eating children’s fruit and veggie squeeze packs just to keep up my nutrition while maintaining the barest of minimum workouts 👍

JT “Just Transforming” Realmuto

Heartbreaking: the worst person you know does something funny

Let me write Jimmy Kimmel’s return monologue

@target you up?

What else WOULD i be listening to at 3 on a Monday while sending emails? Britney was the one who said you better work bitch youtube.com/watch?v=lJjz...

A package my mom sent me via UPS came way early and was delivered to my stoop yesterday after we had already left for Baltimore Some nice neighbor put it in my mailbox, and it was still here today Philly stays winning today (ignore the Phillies, it is ok, the Eagles dramatic win cancels this out)

Big day for haters (me)

Declaring it Big Boi Week in Philadelphia, open container laws DO NOT APPLY

Brb scaling Liberty Place

HOLY SHIT THAT’S SUCH AN EMBARRASSING WAY TO LOSE GOOOOOOO BIRDS

Standing on an el platform edge just in case

AJ heard our desperate calls

They call that taunting in the NFL because of woke

Tush push discourse

I’m getting too old for the second half Eagles — the ol’ ticker doesn’t like it

The Amtrussy must be ran through because it’s so loose that my charger keeps falling out How am I supposed to post through this game

Amtrak employing walking by me with a garbage bag on the train: Trash! Trash! Me: Yes yes, I know, but they might come back?

You can’t let fascism AND the Rams win today

Quick thought and free idea: AJ Brown

Hello my friends with perfect taste in NFL teams, wishing you a very go birds this morning

A whole new world A new fantastic point of view

Some observations from Camden Yards: 1) It’s like 2 parts Yankees fans, 1 part orioles fans, 1 part Phillies fans lol 2) The way this crowd cheered for a Judge single in the 1st is giving Nats fans 3) Unbiased review is that Yankees fans are worse than Phillies fans, but we knew that

CRAB AND CRUSH UPDATE

Is this anything

B A D E R D I N G E R

Are we not making jokes about the Blue Sky Pest Control ad behind home plate on here yet?

The Monkey Club is now serving an $8 pork roll, egg, and cheese, and I don’t even recognize Philadelphia anymore