Blessed are those who know sweet potato pie is better than pumpkin pie.

I've actually put a roof on in 95° Georgia heat... Cause my grandaddy had lenient child labor laws

Establish dominance in a meeting by bringing donuts and saying no one can have any because they are for a later, more important meeting.

I get quite a few ladies mansplaining shit to me on here so we all need to watch that shit. Tone it down, folks.

Everything is always about me

Hit me up if you like boredom and disappointment.

the shitposter in me is still alive and i love it

Might fuck around and explode into 1000 bats later idk

Ooh yeah pour that hope all over me, baby

Apathy or anxiety

Questioning a number is never good.

Here's How Much More Expensive Groceries Have Gotten After Nine Months Of Trump 2.0 - BuzzFeed

i have v little regard for my own life and sometimes i just need to see what i will happen

almost got hit in the crosswalk fucking asshole

ppl always suggest that incels just hire sex workers ummm no thank you we don't want them either just fucking k*ll them

its me btw im the big ol slut

i think another shroom gummy

i eat . drink and do drugs like im still 18 and then wonder why my tummy hurts

oh the moon is back

feel balls Friday

I’m sick, so I’ll probably do a sexy video of me rubbing Vicks Vaporub on my chest later

we got accustomed to just doing whatever whenever reservation in spending is so important we can’t do it all at once

so has anyone been told by a stranger that they wanted to dic you up and you’re like no man I’m good then finished chewing that sweet Crêpes Suzette you’ve been craving for all afternoon?

Anytime someone has said “she ate” the she was me and the ate was a chicken leg

Why name the channel Bravo when Absolute Garbage was right there?

Hear me out, a ball pit, but filled with neon-colored breakfast cereal instead

a piece of advice someone close to me gave to someone close to them regarding a concert ticket or something, that made so much sense, given our status here in the states at the moment was “you can’t afford that right now”

A weighted blanket, but it’s just someone dropping a grand piano on me.

Killdozer:

reincarnation is when you come back as an instant breakfast

full contact origami

i do pomppet shows for fancy events

I always leave costco with at least one regret… Tonight’s regret I’m especially mad about:

i just spent $9 on eggs and live on 2 lightbulbs and a laptop and my electric $200. gtfoh

Explain a film plot badly: Dog arrives at remote Antarctic research base. He was not a Good Boy.

Follow me for more food ideas 🥳

#Brazil today, in the heart of the #Amazon, President Lula took a hugely important step, with the "Tropical Forest Forever " facility - a new push to make standing forests more valuable than cleared land. #ClimateChangeIsReal #ClimateChangeConference source: UNFCCC

I don't want to "drill down," or "circle back" I want to go to sleep on the floor

I didn’t reply you. Please respond.

Yes, I reposted you. But I am not in repost with you.

ok wow they sure give you lots of extra skin as you age

She told me her name was LANA Turns out she was dyslexic

Got my turkey in the microwave. Get on my level

this is a moon account well that and a soup account

normalize throwing progressively harder meals

whistlin dicks, see

I went to New England, and all I got was crabs.

Snuggle up