Phone bill is due TODAY. I cannot lose access to phone service as I rely on it to keep in contact&do face time with some of my sons therapists (he’s asd nonverbal) as well as my internet that’s due in 2 days which gives me access to help so my kids and I can survive while I’m waiting on disability

YOU FUCKING KNOW IT FUCK YEAH

Christian persecution in America is best defined by this image: No actual struggle, wearing clothes that cost more than my entire wardrobe, polished cross instead of rugged, and surrounded by crowds of fellow hypocrites cheering on bigotry who believe they're the victims.

My problem with everything is that I know For A Fact that the purpose of life is frivolity. It is to fool around & pursue joy.

Modern-day Romeo and Juliet where he deletes his social media because he thought she deleted hers but really she just got temporarily suspended for pissing off the mods so when she gets back online she sees that he deleted his account so she gets super sad and deletes hers

Did you know that scientists conducted a study and all the sex diseases can be traced back to one thing? It’s your mom

I'm not sure about this branding but I'm not the billionaire business genius

Things are so messed up we have Reverse Santa now

It's honestly wild how quickly scientists went from detecting gravitational waves for the first time to routinely using them for astronomy. 10 years sounds like a while, but that's just about as long as it takes to train one student from bachelor's degree to PhD. Hats off to the LIGO folks. ⚛️🧪🔭

The thing to emphasize here is that this treatment is *utterly normal.* It's part of the system of detention which has existed for decades. Folkston has been like this for many, many years,

Keep picturing Patel dropping the casings in terror after reading “if you read this youre gay”

I cited actual Kirk quotes where he calls Black women less intelligent, demonizes me for being Muslim, & dehumanizes LGBTQ people—& his supporters are upset at me for “speaking evil of the dead.” If quoting him is “speaking evil” maybe ask yourself why you followed someone who believed evil things.

PRIEST: do you have the ring ME: *still staring into my fiancé’s eyes* yes on dvd

A lot of lone nuts with no coherent political philosophy seem to be very closely related to one specific political philosophy

Three teens were critically wounded Wednesday in a shooting at a high school in the foothills of suburban Denver, including the suspected shooter, authorities said.

Information environment has reached its grotesque conclusion in that there is a very real killer out there who has not been identified, apprehended, or investigated, a detail practically inconsequential to nearly every commentator’s purposes.

Me living by the sword: Swords rule Me dying by the sword: Ugheueghhh

Since Trump changed the name of the DOD to the Department of War, Russia sent drones through Poland's airspace, and Israel sent missiles into Qatar, escalating the conflict in the Middle East. He should have named it the Department of Pussy Ass Bitches.

New Mexico is such a fascinating success story because it's the only solid blue state that's also poor by US standards and despite theoretically having the least tax base to work with they quietly roll out some new social democratic policy every year

it’s pretty insane how all these guys around epstein loved writing letters about how much they love doing crime and pedophilia

Hey dude can you pass me that video of the tall birds simultaneously getting knocked over by a wave thanks

SCOTUS: considering race as one factor in a college applicant's file is blatantly unconstitutional ALSO SCOTUS: considering race as one factor in targeting whom to detain and deport is cool cool cool

what a humiliating way for don jr. to find out his dad sends birthday cards.

not anymore

It seems very telling that the Trump couples are divided into men who want Children above everything, and women who seek financial independence above everything lol. HMMMMMM wonder why they might want financial independence when their partner's top desires are having children and being married lol

Had to nope out of a porn comic I would otherwise like because the male human in it looked like anime Matt Walsh and I couldn’t unsee it.

Cyclist Friend Explains Necessity Of $35 Socks

“Okay, Arlene, take the pic-“ “HEY-OOOO!” “Godammit, Harvey.”

Just a reminder to check for your name in this list of books that OpenAI trained from. If your name is there, they probably owe you several thousand dollars. OpenAI cried that if everyone eligible author files, the company will go bankrupt, so I'm alerting every author I have ever spoken to.

Hahaha Yes

🗽😂

Hilarious that they offered Adams a position at the US Department of the only thing they hire black people for

Fixed it.

RFK Jr Says Lifetime Of Trauma And Heroin Addiction Not To Blame For Insane Opinions

Hey Firefox users.

so there i was, slamming in the back of my dragula when all of a sudden i saw a woman fleeing domestic violence

I'm on the scene in NH where crews continue to clean the shit Rudy Giuliani sprayed all over the road. Estimates for removal are two to three days. "We've never seen anything like it," a worker tells me. "It's like a septic tanker exploded." It remains unclear if Mr. Giuliani has stopped defecating.

these dating apps are getting niche

We built a calculator that doesn't work, but don't worry, it's also a plagiarism machine that will tell you to kill yourself. It runs on the world's oceans and costs 10 trillion dollars.

"I'm losing the will to post" is funny AF though

Among all the other things, "The President has screwed things up so badly that the world's other rich countries won't deliver mail to us anymore" really should end it immediately.

those teardrop tattoos next to my eye but it's little baby footprints for all my abortions

I shitpost with military precision, North Korean military to be precise.

Dave Matthews Band Apologizes After Tour Bus Dumps Another 800 Pounds Of Human Shit Onto Same Boat Full Of People theonion.com/dave-ma...

When you accidentally make a rhyme and only realize at a later time