Excel is our database.

Which is why the world's greatest real analyst, Luigi Houdini, was also the world's most prolific bank robber.

This heartfelt and meaningful statement by Portland resident and author Cristina Breshears on another social media platform bears reposting here. I don't think the intent is to idealize Portland but to remind all of us what is important and why. (Posted here with permission.)

2 hamburger 2 helper

Have you read the good news?

And he's just applying a Christ/Anti-Christ theorem on everything he watches or reads because he's a wacko. It's "Getting a lot of Boss Baby vibes from this" but Jesus/Anti-Christ.

This is reminding me all over again how mad I am that I could not convince other Dem staffers to watch Fox News.

Bari Weiss's full name is Baritone Edelweiss.

Seattle-Tacoma International Airport won’t broadcast a video of Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem saying Democrats caused the federal government shutdown.

Bad journalists support other bad journalists because it makes them think they’re actually good at their job. Neither of these people are a good standard for journalism. They’re bad and should not have the positions they have.

It turns out that protecting hate speech did not create the conditions to protect other kinds of speech; instead, it protected hate and allowed hate movements to take over all the institutions of that might have defended the rest of us.

British what now 🤨☘️

dying at rightwingers falling for what looks like an ai generated turning points USA half time show with special guest “measles”

idea unlocked: furry army.

the actual story here, which the media never talks about, is that police in this country have become a discrete right-wing political operation. the story isn't about cops leaving (they're lying about that), it's about the police trying to exert influence over elections.

I should call her...

Voucher Schools are *not* about educating children. They are about funneling secular tax dollars to Christian businesses. It's a scam.

(🚨) BREAKING NEWS: Donald Trump No Longer Remembers That He Was President and Controlled the FBI on January 6, 2021, Confirming Americans' Worst Fears About His Advanced Dementia

It's hard to help Americans left behind because so much of US identity is rooted in individualism. The average American conservative holds all three positions at once: — Virtue signals about supporting US manufacturing — Against raising the minimum wage — Buys foreign imports because they're cheap

Ultimately, the death of US manufacturing is about this attitude. It's easy to say "buy american or stfu" because virtue signaling is free. But it's hard to actually sustain a business because many Americans simply don't want to pay what it costs to produce things ethically in this country

This two-parter below is exactly why it's hard to make clothes in the United States. Let's look at how much it costs to produce a button-up shirt in the US. 🧵

she also does not seem to know how to use "beef"

I've noticed the opposing team's fans only cheer when the opponents score on us. To win those fans over, I recommend we score on ourselves repeatedly; that will surely make them so happy they'll start supporting us. And I'm sure all our fans will keep cheering for us—who else is there to cheer for?

I was at this concert and lemme tell you, I've never seen a bigger audience pop than this. If only there was some kind of message Democrats could read from this. Oh well! www.thedailybeast.com/pop-star-cha...

good afternoon

Portland, OR, 2025

Jungian @cowtoolsdaily.bsky.social meme

Best analysis of Tron: Ares I've seen, and its from my comment section.

yeah i'm tron tron to enjoy any movie that doesn't contain jared leto

Portland 🔥

This Halloween I’m going as the scariest thing of all, emotional intimacy!!! ha ha just kidding I’m prion disease

i know we (rightly) look down upon the people who purposefully don’t keep up with the news so they can remain blissfully ignorant, but fuck, man, every other item on my timeline is the worst fucking thing i’ve ever seen until i scroll down and read the next even more awful thing

not looking for Elvira precisely but I do need some boobs and banter

Portland right now.

> It is 2025 BC. I am a soldier from one of the outlying provinces called to defend the pyramid in Memphis > It is 2025 AD. I am a soldier from one of the outlying provinces called to defend the pyramid in Memphis

(forgetting the word for antibiotics) do i need cancel culture

President Trump sure likes to fuck kids.

AI has lost the dunce vote. It’s over

Seeing a lot of celebration of this as a win. But at NIH we have seen this exact play before. It looks like it is the Vought strategy -and to stop the lawless firings we have to see the bigger picture. A 🧵:

Jfc.

Designed with activists in mind vs. Designed with gamers in mind

The real horseshoe theory is a bunch of people in our politics have been hit in the head by a fucking horseshoe.

I don't argue with anyone who won't watch a Woody Allen movie; it's a personal choice, different for everyone. But Diane Keaton is a big reason I almost never say "[Movie X] is dead to me." My argument isn't "Separate the artist from the art"; it's that movies are never just one person's legacy.

liberals love to be like "how come you aren't going after republicans?" but the truth is that its just hard to come up with funnier jokes than stuff like this

Border Patrol Chief Greg Bovino said today that Brockman has “charges pending.” He also posted a photo of her in the ICE minivan after she was detained. I asked how she wasn’t charged right away if she assaulted officers and what the charges will be but he hasn’t replied.

“People with morals are faking them for clout” -the most clout poisoned little shit alive