“He’s the ranter whose rants never actually say anything, the life of the party at the party no one enjoys attending, the “big personality” who’s always misjudging the size of the room.” this sums up a lot about everything, honestly

Curaçao’s blue man is crying!

Seeing Marshawn Lynch on TV right at 4:20 feels like it should be a daily thing

That's right.

Update for summer. Is Stephanie Beatriz spanish Walton Goggins or is Walton Goggins english Stephanie Beatriz?

I can do that I just don’t want to

suddenly remembered this amazing screencap by @pftompkins.bsky.social

I hope Spencer Pratt ends up in 5th place as a salute to Riley Gaines and whatnot.

This might be the best video ever

Are you fucking kidding me right now

They could’ve just used the original picture but instead used AI, a process which somehow took more human effort, cost more money, and looked worse

San Antonio and New York City are finally gonna put it all on the line and determine which city makes the best salsa

🚨We have a full Canseco alert🚨

saw a truck for a company called Absolute Chimneys and I can’t stop saying that to myself as if I’m an English soccer announcer calling a free kick that sailed over the crossbar

fullcast had it weeks ago please credit them

Jesus Christ

Getting a quarterback wristband and putting this in it for when I go to the grocery store

Max contract for Red Panda is my only hope

BONUS TWEET: WEMBY! 😱🎃 x.com/NBA/status/1...

BROTHER I USED TO GET PINK EYE FROM WASHING MY PILLOW IN THE TOILET BOWL NOW I’M USING AI AT THE SUPER BOWL

man it's gonna be a long summer

things you need to know about the sheep movie: -- Cousin Greg from Succession plays a bumbling British cop who solves a murder with the help of some sheep -- it's very good -- you will probably cry a little wrote about it type-click-type.ghost.io/reasons-to-w...

*sigh* I really, REALLY don’t want to do this. But my car is officially broken, Bru needs a biopsy on the lump in his side, and my unemployment runs out soon. I’m already freaking out about paying rent next month. Several folks have said to just make one so here I am. gofund.me/929ac5d7c

Hey man, you need to stop taking my fucking videos, cropping off my handle, splicing it with other clips (which you presumably also stole), and then slapping your name on it. It’s one thing to download my TikTok and post it instead of just sharing here, but we’re hitting lawyer territory here.

this graduation speech moment is notable, and her amazed shock at having failed to read the room feels instructive. when you're inside the bubble, you think everybody else is. but everybody isn't.

I have a structured settlement but I need cash now

Celebrating the WNBA season opener by once again sharing my favorite sports graphic of all time.

i found the offender and: • blocked the account • used my considerable computer skills to track them down, flew to their home, and left a burning bag of dog poop on their porch • unblocked them and then blocked them again

This is something I’ve tried to explain to some Bluesky-skeptic writer friends. I still post my links everywhere, but I think the era of the omniplatform is over, so what matters is finding places where actual readers congregate and where you can actually reach them because links don’t get buried

Do you think Splinter passed Hantavirus to the Turtles or even worse, April?

me sleeping seven hours vs. me sleeping six hours and 42 minutes

Fuck it, Zordon Mamdani

On the weather app, days where there is a small chance of overnight rain but it will otherwise be sunny during waking hours should not be represented by the little rainy cloud thumbnail. Bad for morale.

This story was broken by The Cornell Sun, which @nytimes.com nowhere cites. As a former editor-in-chief of The Sun — and in the name of brave, amazing college newspapers everywhere — do not treat student journalists as truffle pigs, taking what they've sniffed out without credit or compensation.

Every 18 seconds someone tests positive for COVID-19. This is that man.

ChatGPT: you’re right you’re so much smarter than him. He’s so schlubby and you’re so suave. Columbo will never catch you.

NASA just dropped more than 12,000 photos from the Artemis II mission. It'll take me a few days to go through them all, but so far it's one stunner after another. Link: eol.jsc.nasa.gov/SearchPhotos... Credit: NASA/Artemis II Crew (h/t @jonostrower.com)

Hello Mother, Hello Father

HAPPENING NOW: Tim Heidecker delivers an update on the future of InfoWars and takes calls from viewers including President Donald J. Trump.

I’m not very good at receiving compliments, so let’s just say, thank you for all the kind words. It has been kind of a surreal evening. And to any new followers, don’t say the governor didn’t warn you, I post a lot about sports (Go M’s, sorry about tonight Twins fans).

I can't believe this. @normcharlatan.bsky.social you're a Minnesota Legend, my man.

Theo Von needs his AJ Hawk.

klay thompson jfk in 1963 🤝 coming to dallas & losing your mind

At Dark Home Depot buying Bar Keepers Enemy

every Pete Thamel haircut is “what if a 1950s Treasury Secretary was getting his First Communion”