The feminine urge to move to a mysterious town with a lot of suspected animal attacks

Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves. One for practice and the other one is the "main" grave.

we're not going to have a good, sustainable social media site as long as it is made or run by tech people. that is why I am building my own out of water, small rocks, moss, snails, brightly colored shrimp, one of those sucking fish, a mermaid statue. I'll be honest, this may actually be an aquarium.

to prove i am immune to harassment, i have made a tactical decision to flash red and become stunlocked

What a website

my follower: did you see this news me: no. it's too many follower: wait, what *placing a blanket gently over your head* no

oh to be perfect and normal in an unexplained black void

bro you look like you drop common items

remember to replace your prosthetic when it gets wilty

This only happens to you once

flags at half mast for teh massive fuckeign shit i;m gonna take later

Closely-related to the Great Blue and Grey Heron, the Cocoi Heron is found in South America. I photographed this lovely specimen at Laguna de Sonso #Colombia #birds #herons #nature

#3082 Cow?

What could you possibly want with my amulet bro you wouldn’t even know how to wield it’s power

Grace just sent this me this tok of a woman accidentally recording her cat in slow motions, and I am SOBBING from laughing so hard

(eating medicinal tater tot casserole after a four hour nap)

The implication of General Mills is that your cereal was milled in the same facility as lumber and textiles

it's a banger but it's inaccessible

"Bluesky is dying" Oh yeah? Then explain why this GIF always does numbers.

Drawing for a thing

those damned outdoor pigs can't keep getting away with this

[RETRACTED DUE TO FATAL TYPO]

Do you ever just... look down because something touched your ankle And there's a guy down there

despite everything, i still believe in the potential of humankind to create utopia. but it will require hard work, courage, and above all else extremely deep v-necks that go almost down to the dick

every now and then i catch myself diligently reading someone’s long-ass thread on here before im like…hang on. i don’t care about any of this

babe i am a whooping gibbon and you are a tall strong tree check out this backflip

Someone invited me to a party tomorrow night so now I have to fake my own death

Sorry but personally if a miniature horse woke me up from anesthesia by banging out nonsense on a miniature keyboard it would send me into a liminal space between life and death from which I would never return

My phone just autocorrected "duck" to "fuck" when I actually really did mean to say "duck," and I feel like I have finally broken its spirit

nobody in this entire urgent care waiting room likes crowd work??

A molting Zammara smaragdina cicada tonight in my garden at @casabentbill.bsky.social #insects #invertebrates #nature #costarica

Skylight test 🐕♥️

My body is crying out for dense high calorie foods to build up enough fat to sustain me before I enter my death like slumber

i am just performing a drunkards walk that happens to be going in your direction at the moment

one time a murderer stabbed me to death but then they took me to the hospital and a doctor stabbed me right back to life

With some of you I know you're only liking a skeet for proper use of grammar and punctuation.

Might as well 𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝚒𝚝𝚎𝚖

Interviewer: and how do you explain this gap in your resume? Me: (trying to explain my time trapped in the faerie realms but a geas prevents me from speaking of it, so I'm forced to just spout gibberish instead) I was growth-hacking my personal brand to leverage my core competencies

Going deep into the earth, too greedily and too deep, if anyone wants anything