Hey man. I noticed you haven’t followed me back yet. You’re probably busy coming up with crazy tweet ideas lol. Anyway I did a quick spell check on the full corpus of your posts so you can see the errors you made 𝔸𝕥𝕥𝕒𝕔𝕙𝕞𝕖𝕟𝕥𝕤: 📄 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬.𝐜𝐬𝐯

I’m Bill Symptom, come on down to Bill Symptom Ford and check out these deals

"Anti-ice" was also on the snowplow that got Jeremy Renner

(star wars Jawa voice)

I once found a dead bedbug in my home with no further issue, i imagine that's pretty rare. maybe the only time that's ever happened?

"Anti-ice" was also on the snowplow that got Jeremy Renner

I don't think Michael Myers should be creeping around strangers' houses at night

It is so funny to me that Freddy Krueger wrote his name inside his hat. The banality of evil. In Freddy Krueger's nightmare, he loses his hat

So Donald Trump is President. Again. And we're all ok with this?

Halloween is coming? This is truly the darkest possible timeline

And then they probably did them the next weekend as well

breaking news, they just killed the last mythical being. unknown at this time if it was a unicorn, a lindwurm, a will-o-the-whisp, or even the humble bigfoot. whatever it was, it is now dead, as are all the others. with it, the last remnants of magic have left the world. we say goodbye and thanks

Finally watched Psycho and i still don't understand why it's called that?

I hate how bouncy some castles are now. What ever happened to nice, firm castles that don't send unsuspecting castlegoers violently flailing into each other in a desperate bid for equilibrium..

Can think of two things wrong with this so-called grasshopper

Can think of two things wrong with this so-called grasshopper

The past is not a foreign country, because you cannot travel there..

*playing a California Raisins record for a friend* Pretty good right? These are raisins playing all the instruments

Witchcraft in the computer age

This guy always pissed me of...

Go ahead. Leave me a voicemail with swears in it. My wife will just record it to the computer and bleep them out before i listen to it anyway, so you're wasting your time.

Watched Face/Off for the first time last night lol

Need Terrence Malick to make a movie about my life so that I can appreciate my life

They found guitar tabs on Pete townshend's computer. he's not supposed to need those..

Witchcraft in the computer age

Dr Samuel Johnson invented the English dictionary so that he could put pictures of his enemies beside unflattering words

Same

97% of satire skewers our follies. And in my opinion that's illegal

The beatles purposefully wrote catchy songs to generate interest in their band

97% of satire skewers our follies. And in my opinion that's illegal

Eyes Wide Shut was a cautionary tale about renting a costume

Their goal is to make you feel shitty. Fight back by feeling slightly less shitty than they want you to

Damn, check your egg nog everyone. I just looked at the date on mine and it's expired

My wife and i are thinking of having an adult

The guy who discovered the first giant dinosaur bone probably thought it was just a one-off

Wow.. jerks really are mean

Turner classic movies? i hardly know her classic movies

I'm gonna need you guys' debit cards

"Be careful what you wish for" is no joke.. i got sepsis after accidentally wishing for it

Writing an elevated horror movie where the monster is a metaphor for fear

My wife and i are thinking of having an adult

Homer's imp son

It's a new world now and the old rules no longer apply

Nice to see the fiery furnaces regaining some measure of activity

What do ya mean "voice actor"

If you believe in "magic beans", I've got a bridge to sell you. And actually, some magic beans as well..

"Be careful what you wish for" is no joke.. i got sepsis after accidentally wishing for it

There should be a "Money Museum" where you can go to look at a billion dollars

dude Freddy Krueger is real. i seen him in my dream