Mormon child rapist with "pobody's nerfect" printed on his magic underwear

dude died in the shitter 50 years ago you don't have to do this

can any doctors confirm that horse lungs and baby lungs are identical

'the meat had been identified as lung tissue from either a horse or a human infant, "the structure of the organ in these two cases being almost identical."' en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kentuck...

boss just sent out an AI-written email about the future of the industry and I've never been more concerned about the security of my job

i bet those 1723 dudes went fuckin nuts when the beat dropped in Vivaldi's Winter

society full of guys whose heads make a whistling sound when the wind blows over them

will stancil going on another rant about how there's no empirical evidence that americans care about consumer prices at the exact moment when 42 million americans lose SNAP benefits is a textbook case of what we call "special smart boy disease"

eventually they're going to make it illegal to not use chatgpt

always funny when christian nationalists are like "this great nation, where greed is our sole virtue, is in danger of becoming ungodly"

the only thing pedophiles love as much as raping children is saying stuff like "technically it's gaboogaphilia" or "technically he's just a babingophile"

i should be allowed to tell people that i think they need to be kicked in the teeth. i'm not threatening to do it to them, i'm just letting them know that i think it would help them to grow as a person if someone else did that.

building a robot whose only function is to twist off the heads of silicon valley c-suite guys

American brains so cooked they think shoveling public funds to Sam Altman for play money is public assistance.

hey let's get a quick review of those "conservative values"

when Lovecraft describes something as "non-euclidian" he means it has dutch angles

lynyrd skynyrd are idiots man all birds are changing all the time, nothing is truly permanent

75% of Americans think the movie Sinister is a true story

all the leaves are brown (all the leaves are brown) and the sky is gay (and the sky is gay)

you guys wanna see a psychopath

pretty sure a huge limb off my neighbor's tree just fell and hit my house.

some may...

i'm hearing that zohran mamdani's first act as mayor will be to make it illegal to be walkin' here

POV you stopped her from playing with medication

why does it look like a bad photoshop i got tired of trying to make look right

"hey i was wrong about conservatives, please forgive me. by the way did you know that the muselmann is an inherently dishonest creature?"

matt yglesias thinks that haitian immigrants are going to eat your cat.

just become a fucking republican already fuck's sake.

i'm hearing that andrew cuomo is going to have to rest in the cursed soil wherein he was buried in order to recover from this defeat

I dont know with what weapons woke 3 will be fought, but woke 4 will be fought with sticks and stones

what if a dracula lost the election for mayor of nyc

Women hold up 78% of the sky

congrats to Zohran Mamdani's aloof wife

Say: ManyGA

my long term ape

i love how much of our economy is a bunch of dudes nodding at each other and saying "we're rich!" in increasingly panicked tones

"he may have been responsible for the deaths of a million people but at least he raised a daughter who did something symbolic and ineffective" fuck you, fuck off

me when i think commodities appear magically from nowhere

people will be like, "American Psycho is so stupid and unrealistic no one would act like this" and then go on the news and say, "he was such a nice boy i didn't see any signs that he would shoot up a school"

i'm hearing reports that the demons in hell are calling him "dick chainy" because of all the shit they're doing to his dick with chains

*guy beckoning you toward a creepy van* hey kid, you want using scissors to be all fucked up and annoying? the first taste is free...

A monk asked Master Zhao Zhou, "Does a minecraft creeper have Buddha Nature?"

she's so aloof we could only find one picture where she wasn't smiling affectionately at her husband!

me: "okay this week's movie might be pretty weird" my friends, absolutely sick of my shit: "what the fuck am I seeing rn" me: "i said it might be weird you can't get mad"

one day, one of these psychopaths who we've allowed to amass more wealth than many nations is going make the unilateral decision to do something like this and throw the world into chaos and misery that we cannot possibly imagine.

if i ever find out one of my friends has done this to me we aren't friends anymore. outrageously disrespectful.

cum a cum a cum a cum a cum a chameleon you cum a whole lizard out of your dick