sexy hot boby

I was once watching a one laptop act who like put it on play and started dancing in front of it and accidentally unplugged his whole shit and we had to wait for him to boot his macbook back up to finish his set

the new Star wars opening crawl sucks

if there are ennumerated replies you cant see to one of your posts you have been visited by digital ghosts

ive decided to stop coughing. if i need anything cleared out i will simply sneeze

Buffalo treehopper nymph

this ad makes me want to order and eat a bag of dirt

found two bucks on the floor of the forest today. the earth provides

RIP Mike F.

insane core strength chickadee #birds

have to return a watering can because i already had one i didnt see. going to simply explain i am this stupid to the people at the store

When it comes to cats and their food: if it don’t stink they don’t know what to think

i am out standing in a field

due to their intense inflicting of pain, whenever i visit the pump that is, i call them gasp prices.

Q: What kind of cookies do birds like? A: Chocolate chirp

ran out of my stamina meter so im taking health damage doing regular stuff around the house

oh man. didn't you hear? they posterized him.

what kind of coffee do you want? (a little too urgently and nervously) Regular! Regular coffee. Regular style. Thanks.

UHOH spegettiooo

cheryl tunt made me chuckle today

1. eat(?) pollen 2. (???) 3. get the honey out of (???)

the hunt. the kill. #🪶

i hate the bald green bug baby. they are supposed to stay on that remote swamp planet so i don't have to see that

honey is so crazy. thank goodness bees know how to make it because i've got no damn idea.

sowing actually sucks. the memes were wrong

logging on

mr. met is like doctor doctor when i make love to mrs. met, it is so short-lived. i don’t give my wife the pleasure she deserves and the doctor is like, the solution is-a very simple. just-a think about baseball. and mr. met is like, but doctor, I am baseball

she only has one coin

if you live anywhere bluish on this map & like birds or butterflies, learn to pull garlic mustard (see eg extension.psu.edu/garlic-mustard)

@jlp.systems i found your wordstyle of threatened native plant

neighbor put his long sleeve overshirt on a post on a windy day. i keep thinking he's waving for my attention but its just a fuckin shirt!

listen up, lefties: if you get out of the pool, you’re admitting defeat to the big diarrhea dog turd floating in the pool

i really like how food invented a long time ago didn't have to have good names

control frequency is the new guys chat

blocking all accounts of newspaper with video of the american crying about hamburgers in another country or whatever. i need real news

told a coworker i used to work at the dump and they asked me if that’s where i got my haircut

from @cakemittens.bsky.social whose riffs always eclipse the original joke

People are just insane now of days

there are only a few tasks and jobs left where you spend time buying blades. so when the opportunity strikes, savor it.

im leaving nonessential spelling errors in everything that doesnt vet me paid. im not doing free labor. #business #money #professionalism

found the first tick climbing me. summer is here. and it's out for blood. but this time, uh.... something bites back. well, i squished it

crazy how ppl online can reify any criticism no matter how mild or indirect into some kind of morality war. not lookin good for criticism 📉😔

need sprawling vines on all my items. lock it all down in case thieves come. then theyll struggle loudly with the vines and i can get them

its OVER for invasive shrubberies

going to rake some dirt like it's the damn Great Depression

NEW: ChatGPT advised the FSU shooter that a mass shooting would get more attention from media if it involved several children, according to a new lawsuit against OpenAI www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news...

the ice cream man goes around blaring that music not even fearing an ambush or anything. it's so arrogant and reckless.

I’ve been home sick for a week which is long enough to really get into The Detective Game, wherein I carefully examine my own apartment from the POV of a hardboiled noir protagonist who’s searching for clues to my murder and falling in love with me in the process