Pasta Fazool
@christopherdowning.bsky.social
📤 922
📥 463
📝 461
My Nonsense:
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:c43wr2lokhmmk53ipxhhunsm/feed/aaahcn2qzzoka
pinned post!
Chairs are pretty great. You can fight a lion, or sit if you want.
about 1 year ago
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I let AI go ahead of me in traffic, and it didn’t give me a thank you wave.
about 23 hours ago
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TwoSense
1 day ago
I’m on this really nice diet called eat spaghetti before bed
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Mary
2 days ago
I left my college kids a note taped to the back door about the yard before I left for work saying “I watered everything.” Both found the note hilariously aggressive due to the use of a period. They later took turns reading it to me in the various tones in which they received it.
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Sir, a second plane has pulled out of the America 250 celebration.
1 day ago
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presentdad🙋🏻♂️
1 day ago
origami artists make terrible poker players because they always fold
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FᎪᎢ ᏩᎪNᎠᎪᏞF
2 days ago
I told my kid that in Sweden a karate instructor is callled a svensei and then my wife called the cops.
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🍕 L.T. Vargus, disgraced author🍕
1 day ago
a short skirt and a loooooooooong party sub
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2 days ago
Blue Origin: our glenn rocket has experienced an anomaly guy named Glenn Rocket: what
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Before Thomas Edison, refrigerators had a candle in them.
1 day ago
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Charlie Alzamora
1 day ago
Your starvation diet seems to be working. You already look ten years hunger.
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At Wrestlemania 12, Goldust hit Rowdy Roddy Piper with a fucking car, and you’re over there pretending you have problems.
3 days ago
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3 days ago
me: also, what’s up with cherry tomatoes ? are they cherries or tomatoes ? my gynecologist: what
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los 🦦
3 days ago
A royal rumble but it’s Home Depot parking lot drivers vs Trader Joe’s parking lot drivers
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James Damron
3 days ago
I tried to write jokes about hydrogen and oxygen, but they kept getting watered down...
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Inflation is fun when it’s a balloon.
3 days ago
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Amy
4 days ago
hydrogenate me like one of your vegetable oils 🫦
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FRONT TOWARD ENEMY
3 days ago
what happened to the days when young men threw hot dogs at their one true love
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Mr. Bea Arthur, Batshit Crazy™️
4 days ago
Honestly, I have no fuckin idea why anybody is following me at this point.
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trickykat
3 days ago
following my bluesky account will always remain ad free because fuck capitalism *takes a swig of Coke Zero and smiles at the camera*
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I have an Egyptian friend who owns a parking enforcement company called Camel Tow.
5 days ago
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Charlie Alzamora
5 days ago
Stevie Nicks turns 78 Tuesday. That's an awful lot of candles on the cake so Stand Back, Stand Back!
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Lizzlepants 🐒
5 days ago
I never travel into the woods alone there might be a man out there
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Another time traveler showed up to the White House yesterday.
7 days ago
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I had one of those vibrating pens from KB Toys in the 90s, so I’m pretty sure I could do tattoos.
8 days ago
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lalalyds
8 days ago
I dunno but I think a bologna and cheese sandwich with crushed doritos on it might fix a few of us
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Forrest Plump
8 days ago
One day you’re young and carefree, and the next you’re watching a storm from your porch while saying “we needed this rain.”
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MrsFitz
8 days ago
The day turned out too warm for my frock coat and bipperty-bopperty hat.
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Travis comma bitch
8 days ago
I know more about English literature than you can shake a speare at
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los 🦦
8 days ago
life360 but for ice cream trucks
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Mary
11 days ago
It’s time for our annual tradition of standing in the backyard looking up at sky mistaking the cast from mercury vapor fixture on the garage for the Northern Lights.
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weeder
9 days ago
My milkshake brings all the ants to my car
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Jane
9 days ago
You could prob do anything in Alabama
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Deeks 🫶
8 days ago
*takes my ball gag and goes home
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Your jacket doesn’t squirt, it’s just a peacoat.
9 days ago
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The only people who want mice in their house, are people who have rats in their house.
9 days ago
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Graduates look like they’re cosplaying as a judge. And send.
13 days ago
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My boss said it's inappropriate to bring my CPAP machine to work.
13 days ago
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Matty
13 days ago
Please wait Do not remove your card Do not remove your card Do not remove your card HOLY FUCKING SHIT REMOVE YOUR CARD
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Stevie Wonder recently attended his 76th birthday party in Detroit, he was told.
13 days ago
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They made Twinkies smaller, so now I just eat two. I win.
13 days ago
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weeder
14 days ago
It's so heartwarming when you see a whole family of dorks
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B 🐝
14 days ago
always the bridesmaid, never the sea hag luring sailors to a watery grave
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Chat
14 days ago
"birth rates are declining" don't care I already got born
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Amy
14 days ago
“dunno if i’ll do any flipping but i’m all about flopping,” i say, sliding my feet into these noisy open-toed shoes
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I call John Travolta’s Beret as a band name.
14 days ago
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chris.
15 days ago
If it is good enough to line my uterus, it is good enough to line your shelves, Kevin.
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Dan Cerinthedark
15 days ago
dressing up like a sexy raccoon might solve at least a few of your problems
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TwoSense
15 days ago
I said I was gonna wait until 2pm to have a beer but I waited until 2:15 and that’s how you exceed your goals, kids.
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Roses are red, get your ears pierced at Claire’s…
15 days ago
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Pasta Fazool
15 days ago
i deleted that post . you happy now, you idiots ? hi ! 😘
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