Death seems the only desirable sequel for a career like this

10K toenail clippings needed for Canadian study on potential lung cancer risk https://globalnews.ca/news/11469664/lung-cancer-study-radon-gas-toenails-calgary/ 𝗠𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗻𝗲𝘄𝘀 ⇢ CanadaHealthwatch.ca 🍁

Been running around outside at night lately like the Weapons kids. Feels good. Refreshing.

I wrote a 15 page report on heraldic symbolism in medieval armor and weapon design for my art history class the night before it was due (8am class). Made up 90% of it (only found one book for reference) and got an A. GenAI could fucking never.

This is my post-baby body (I used to be a baby)

I like it when there are a bunch of people on here talking about a sporting event that I'm not watching. It's like seeing a flock of pigeons eating a smashed sidewalk donut together. I'm not partaking, but you guys dig in.

Never forget that Australia went to war with emus in 1932 and the emus won

The janitor squints at the unfinished equation, picks up the chalk and scrawls methodically. Soon all the eights have top-hats like snowmen.

The best part: They get mad when I've acquired direct line emails to individuals in the ministry and have attempted to contact them that way. What conclusion is one supposed to draw from this other than that they regard their transparency obligations and journalists with utter contempt?

Today I received an Access to Information request package from Global Affairs Canada. I filed the request 2 years and 10 months ago. The package consisted of four pages, two of which were redacted 👍

This is why it’s a problem to have right-wing governments at the local government level. If passed, this budget would not only devastate services, it would pass debt to future councils. Interest and inflation don’t magically disappear. It’s “electoral math,” not fiscal prudence or good governance.

This is maybe the most insulting thing you could say about a human being lol

Elections Alberta has approved a citizen-initiated petition application to gather signatures in support of the proposal to end public funding to independent/private schools. Calgary teacher Alicia Taylor says she brought it forward because it could help improve funding for public schools. #AbEd

“A second inflatable frog has now been spotted wiggling through Portland.”

Here's a little cartoon for #WorldOctopusDay 🐙

Dolly Parton called a press conference to clarify formally that no weapon formed against her will prosper

#VancouverBC - ‘This will not happen again’: Vancouver Park Board apologizes for hosting Harry Potter event www.ctvnews.ca/vancouver/ar...

its like the old saying goes, if you dont get everything done in one day you should give up. its obviously not going to happen

jerry seinfeld on the phone: you're at lake MUNGO?!

Join us in singing the praises of Snuff the dog and Roger Zelazny's "A Night in the Lonesome October," the perfect Halloween treat for fans of classic horror, mystery, and fantasy! reactormag.com/whos-a-good-...

"AI is sentient because it mimics our behavior" bro you are a bronze age peasant who thinks your shadow is a demon

There was a joke on the Simpsons about how no one cares about Tron! That was 30 years ago!

Speeders hate speed cameras.

giving my horde the day off to frolic

sending love and support to my friends in portland who are currently being held hostage by the violent criminal gang known as the dandy warhols

In Lieu of Flowers, send 9 voting districts

Why do I want to throw every human I hear loudly chewing out of the nearest window but when it’s an animal it’s just the cutest sound ever

When I follow you I am saying that if you started a religious cult with you as the primary object of worship I would join it

I'm fascinated by how the sale of alcohol, a carcinogen that causes/exacerbates untold societal problems and interpersonal abuse, is constantly positioned as a social good. Would the Globe and Mail publish a sob story about how the postal strike is making tobacco harder to buy? I doubt it.

Jane Goodall’s final wish: blast Trump, Musk and Putin to space

I was recruited to the Beaverton because of my tweets. And the experience I got writing and editing for the Beaverton is how I landed my current, full-time job.

Postal workers in Canada are on strike to preserve delivery service as a job with a living wage. If they lose, even state-run delivery will be remade in the image of the gig economy.

if you work for a publication that does this and have any idea how much $$$ your outlet makes from affiliate sale commissions on prime day, DM or signal me: jason.404 also interested if you are a journalist who is asked to do these deal roundups as part of your job

Still waiting for a more efficient explanation of everything than "Everyone got brain damage from Covid": the airline executives charging a $155 predatory premium for legroom, the guy deciding to customize his own flight experience, the chain of command aborting the whole flight—busted mind-traffic!

The RIAA was suing teenagers. We had to sit through ⬇️ this shit anytime we wanted to watch a DVD. A whole generation shamed for using Limewire and torrents. Only for these silicone valley assholes to now find copyright infringement a necessary evil they shouldn’t have to answer for

Yeah here’s Dolly on IG cleaning up her sister’s mess. Hair done, makeup done, shooting promos. Alive and well: www.instagram.com/reel/DPjkor7...

We live in a golden age of being able to watch moving images while taking a shit.

Burr called performing in Riyadh one of the top 3 experiences of his life lmao

So many people think that "ah you can't really tell an AI wrote this post or not!" is a gotcha. Ok, let's say you're right. But if your post is shaped like an AI post, and your thoughts are shaped like AI thoughts, then the fact that there's no difference reflects rather poorly on you.

My top spots for fall photos around Stanley Park in #Vancouver. The colours aren't all in yet, maybe another week or so 🍁 I'll report back. #photography #autumn #photos #fall #canada

What do you know, the ostrich farmers owe money all over Canada for the ostrich schemes of the past. They are in arrears on $250K worth of debt and their creditors find their interim payments of ostrich oil instead of actual loonies to be insufficient www.cbc.ca/news/canada/...

This is extremely alarming. Prime Minister @mark-carney.bsky.social won the federal election promising to make us *less* depending on the US. Now we are hearing reports that he is offering up a CLOSER energy and military partnership in exchange for a trade deal... 🧵 www.cbc.ca/news/politic...

People Are Crashing Out Over Sora 2’s New Guardrails 🔗 www.404media.co/sora-2-conte...

if AI biz was started by $5 trillion stolen in armed robbery from a bank it wouldnt be allowed to continue on. but since it was made by robbing artists of $5t worth of value, its fine.

Shit, @publisherslunch.bsky.social has made the connection

We're going public today with a powerful new tool for researching, following and reporting on local governments across Canada. It’s dragging cities and towns into the 21st century by making 550 municipalities’ public meetings easy to search, all in one place, for the first time.

$41 million: The amount of money we’ve raised for indie bookstores since 2020. $0: The amount of money Amazon has raised for indie bookstores since 1994.