JOE MANTEGNA: did you update my IMDB picture ASSISTANT: sure thing boss. Real crazed like you asked

Most-requested-song-on-the-Dr. Demento-show ass headline

At what point am I tax exempt

I just caught this tour in LA! If you live in San Diego, Phoenix, Tucson, or NM, I stronnnnngly encourage you to do the same Advance Base / Casiotone songs solo AND a full band finale? C’mon now

Takin’ Mare Of Cusiness

Between NIRVANNA: THE BAND: THE SHOW: THE MOVIE and PROJECT HAIL MARY, the breakout star of 2026 is Whiteboards

La Staples Baddie, C’est Moi

Between NIRVANNA: THE BAND: THE SHOW: THE MOVIE and PROJECT HAIL MARY, the breakout star of 2026 is Whiteboards

If you cry because someone just stole your car in The Valley, it's Clueless.

When you cry in your car, it’s sad. When you cry in your car in the Valley, it’s MAGNOLIA.

Hey Michael McDonald, what name do you like to sing and what do you like to sing it into

I think you're the first. This was 15 minutes not well-spent...

TRAP (2024, Shyamalan)

send him off with a 21 Jib-Jab Salute

2004 IT guys will honor Chuck Norris by flying their printed-out sheet of jokes at half-mast

In this week's newsletter, @jamesfolta.com & I rounded up great writing by @dcpierson.bsky.social, @eddie-small.bsky.social, and Ezra Deutsch-Feldman in @mcsweeneys.net, and Elizander Espenschied in @havehashad.com. Plus info about one of my workshops starting next week! Check it out & subscribe ⬇️

What is the statute of limitations on using the bathroom at a place you’re not a customer

“We come to this place for cigs” - Nicole Kidman if AMC was the stairwell at a Catholic high school

New from me in @pointsincase.com

How come nobody told me Fugazi made a song that sounds like Peppermint Patty would walk around to it

Thread. I’ll say it: movies are good

“We come to this place for cigs” - Nicole Kidman if AMC was the stairwell at a Catholic high school

Motherboy Revisited

Streisand doing the Redford tribute, huh? I was technically in Capt. America 2 with him but go off

This win is shared by Coke Freestyle enthusiasts everywhere

@emilyvgordon.bsky.social SPOTTED

Thomas Pynchon cutaway or we riot

It’s alive

“Dunking your followers to see if they’re a witch”

Blade RUNNER? Not around the pool, I hope

Blade RUNNER? Not around the pool, I hope

Live this very moment with the Everything Now Show gang on Twitch twitch.tv/everythingnowshow

As someone who did indeed read this book to his kids when they went to be, this is a delight.

New from me in @mcsweeneys.net!

Back when physical tickets were a thing. I’m pretty sure this is when I went with @dcpierson.bsky.social, & we got to ride in a golf cart, like special people. Because those are the memories you cherish. (The show was also good) (Shout-out to @andyrichter.co) (We did not check in on FourSquare)

One small way in which society has improved is the introduction of the small can of Cherry Coke, for the gentleman soda drinker

New from me in @mcsweeneys.net!

Batman’s dad will be like “I know a spot” then take you here

Foxcatcher weather

GUY READING HIS 2ND BOOK AFTER ONLY EVER HAVING READ “THE TIPPING POINT”: this Gatsby fellow is something of a superconnector

Complete this Magnetic Fields lyric

ATTN NY-AREA ROCKERS: I have 2x tickets to the Daniel Romano’s Outfit show @ TV Eye this Sunday I cannot use. Let me know if you want em for below face value 🫡

Sky funeral for me plz

Not everyone can throw on a blazer and look like they’re about to break up with 2007 Greta Gerwig on digital video

Obsessed with and mad about how handsome Jay McCarrol from Nirvanna The Band is. Curse his mumblecore good looks

“Computer,

Inside the Situation Room the night they found Sugar Man