still my favorite christmas post

i want my friends to remember me fondly. and my enemies to remember me as The Creature

Chatbots — LLMs — do not know facts and are not designed to be able to accurately answer factual questions. They are designed to find and mimic patterns of words, probabilistically. When they’re “right” it’s because correct things are often written down, so those patterns are frequent. That’s all.

i hope this email never finds you. i hope you are free

sorry if I’ve been in a weird mood the past seven years

We should have listened when the modems screamed at us.

water left in a glass overnight tastes bad because it gets haunted

“I asked ChatGPT-“ okay well I asked the big oak tree at the center of the woods and she said you’re a lazy dork

A Chicago Pope implies the existence of an MLA Pope and APA Pope

I don’t mean to alarm anyone, but the orcas now have two F/A-18 Hornets

There it is…

[at a job interview] INTERVIEWER: quick question about your cover letter ME: of course INTERVIEWER: all it says is “I have dedicated my life to the destruction of my enemies. If you hire me, your enemies will become mine and will also be destroyed.” ME: that’s correct

Poilievre losing his seat is almost Shakespearean: Pretender to the throne riles countrymen with anger, gets defeated by guy with Joy in his name. It’s basically Macbeth.

It's a start

Honestly, me too.

I wake up, I post bangers. You wake up, the splendor of your legacy radiant, evident to all who behold it, shimmering in the new dawn, present to its moment. we are not the same

Does this sound familiar? *coughcoughDOGEcoughcough* Also, look at this guy. Where does the CPC find such absolute gomers?

you know things are going well when they break out the turnip photos

A Tumblr quote engraved on my soul is “Hope isn’t a delicate soap bubble. Hope has mud in her hair and blood on her face, and she’s spitting out a tooth as she gets up One. More. Time.”

going to start calling myself a centrist and then listing all my leftist views as proof, just going to start moving the overton window by force

Fascists want us divided, uninformed and sick. A sick, apathetic population won’t put up much of a fight. Protect your health. Read local independent journalists. Support libraries, community fridges & food banks. Give to mutual aid. Wear a mask. Strong inclusive communities will save lives

I just want to put it out there if you’re one of those people who cleans gravestones and you come across mine covered in moss, leave it be, it is my blanket and it is intentional

girls be like “i know a spot” then sacrifice you under the blood moon.

A total eclipse of the heart killed my father you son of a bitch

its amazing how chatgpt knows everything about subjects I know nothing about, but is wrong like 40% of the time in things im an expert on. not going to think about this any further

I learned this morning that a president doesn't have the power to impose tariffs unilaterally except under the auspices of "national security" So I now understand why the non existent "fentanyl from Canada" crisis is being invoked. It is a cover to ruin our economy to facilitate annexation.

How many calories does constant seething rage burn

the worst part about doing laundry is having to eat all the lint from the dryer trap, I wish there was a different way

Are we human or are we dancer, or are we some sort of grotesque human/dancer hybrid, an unholy abomination unto god that should never have been

PSA: Being transphobic makes you look stupid.

I’m not fun at parties. I am ominous at parties. I am eating an alarming amount of apps and then slipping back into the woods at parties.

Panic and despair without an outlet can be self-destructive. Interrupt the doom spiral: -Do 1 self-indulgent thing that makes you feel happy or content. -Do 1 thing to make your home environment more calm or comfortable. -Do 1 thing to help your community and people in it. Repeat as needed.

Touch grass. Now touch stone. Now touch water. Now spill blood inside the glyph. Now light the brazier

You was in the club without clarity of purpose

*standing in front of open refrigerator eating cold pasta with my hands* I keep telling you I'm not single why won't you believe me

No don’t want the ‘Pro’ version of the computer, I want the ‘Amateur’, which doesn’t hide commands in obscure places, doesn’t want to keep updating everything all the time, and is on good speaking terms with the printer.

Boss made a dollar, Grandad made a dime. But that was a poem From a simpler time. Boss made a thousand, Gave my Dad a cent. But that coin paid the mortgage, Or at least it paid the rent. Now bosses make a billion, And give us workers jack. Then smugly blame society, For the labor that they lack.

Full of potatoes and unrealized dreams.

Skyla identifies immediately in her marketing the key info we all need to decide about this book. It’s scary but the cats will be fine.

It’s a full moon, don’t forget to fall in love with a forest witch with ominous powers tonight!

walk without rhythm and it won’t attract the worm