hey everyone. i got raptured. sorry you got left behind

Many people don’t know that Christopher Nolan’s “odyssey” is based off an Ancient story known as “my big fat Greek wedding”

"I have never seen an autistic 70 year old man" this idiot has never watched a single minute of PBS

on a seem food diet. if it seem food i eat it

my mom smoked cigs and drank tab so thats why my brain is so fast

looking good. feeling good

imagine just learning about gwar in 2025

i can't wait for the trump admin to reveal what causes autism tomorrow so i can get started on my autismmaxxing regimen

roast where we just pull up the roastee’s mychart

i love every cloud in the sky

good morning

lend me your energy

it's 2am i am listening to ambient music and i will never die

let’s get this bread

my favorite subgenre of Halloween decoration is “skeleton of things that absolutely do not have skeletons”

Strange, the bully is kicking my ass even though I've been telling everyone how much I respect him. Maybe he hasn't heard

Guy just walked out of the combination KFC and Taco Bell holding a pizza. I don’t know man. Food store

butterfly garf has been started

i’m experiencing visions

Sorry I lost your dog, he hit a speed boost arrow & that’s the last I saw him

Hired a new guy to hand out lozenges to my screaming horde they just don’t strike the same fear into the hearts of men when they get all raspy and hoarse

let’s start calling sweatpants, pajama pants, and any other non-constricting soft pants “boneless pants”

anyone want some nasty ass gunk

good morning

Hoooly shit .. Will Smith just plapped Chris rock at the Oscar's

everyone’s got that one homie who carries a special coin in his pocket that he can flip to determine your fate

my hospital bed is comfy wish i could sleep

ouuugghh

soon i will delete the entire internet

the most fun thing ever is coughing. the most fulfilling thing is coughing. the most joyous thing is coughing

thinking about my enemies. i hate those guys.

shoutout to bread; gotta be up there for best human invention

wifi flavor la croix

tried to snap this joker car with my phone and accidentally did the best composition of my life

answering a call from an unknown number during job interview and allowing myself to be scammed

MelissasAmazingPics 🌴 grassyvalley.thecomi...

i’ll be tabling at san diego zine fest on sunday, october 19th at woo! studios. see attached flyer for more info 💕😎

thinking about becoming an aquatic creature

when i breathe it sounds like the wind blowing through an old haunted mansion

If we all synchronise our movements just right we can produce a dazzling visual illusion that disorients and confuses all predators

wouldn’t it be wild if a cat ended up becoming a dog

they're going to keep moving closer to their webcams until something is done

It's official: I'm taking up the blade.

it's friday

brute forcing my way into having a good day. knocking shit over, yelling at people etc. whatever it takes

i'll stop dogposting for now but the weird dog is advancing at a rapid rate

the dog is being cloned