ChatGPT: you’re so right, Leto Atreides II. Merging with a worm would give you unconscionable power that you, alone, could wield — you, alone, could be trusted with. You wouldn’t be committing a genocide. You would be saving humanity

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Conan: fuck AI Jimmy Kimmel: fuck censorship Javier Bardam: free Palestine Joachim Trier: don't vote for do nothing politicians The commercials: try Copilot :)

Independence Day (1996) taught me that the president should fight during wartime

on today’s episode of am i depressed or am i simply cold …!

tfw ur boss asks u to be a reference as a coworker for a job they're applying for but u can't ask them for a reference as a supervisor for a job ur trying to leave for

wet_haybale joined PeasantChat. <puddlesipper> wellcome ye back <wet_haybale> ta <puddlesipper> hast tha seen the moon this eve <wet_haybale> nay be it ftrange ? <HimWhatEkes> tis red <wet_haybale> that be new ? <gleanmachine> Zounds man do ye ever look up? <wet_haybale> not unlefs it pleafe milord

Jacked action hero with goon in headlock, in raspy yet firm voice:

How will this affect the Riyadh comedy scene

My brother, we had to explain a 1/3 pound burger was bigger than a quarter pound burger and still failed

when the emotional support pasta doesn't quite hit like it's supposed to <<<<<<<<<<

i'm teaming up with kalshi to pick up a car battery, angle it so that one of its corners is pointed at the ground, and drop it directly on my toenail

good evening; america has been a 249 year social experiment by harvard university that is now complete. thank you for your time

“direct your anger at trump not the democrats” buddy you are severely underestimating the amount of anger i have available to me

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Kikuri and Ludicolo!

Saw this in Discord and it’s amazing

A panel from dungeon meshi that changed my life

Wilhelm Schulz, 1920

look at my country man, we’re getting out-No Kings’d by the fuckin’ british

(watching fallout) babe, would you still love me if my skin was all off? if I got all microwaved?

Gandalf really is heroic when you consider that there were originally five wizards and one of them turned evil, two of them fucked off and went out east to have orgies, and one is just super into talking to gophers. The one last hope of free peoples was the stoner and that crazy mfer did it.

Yennefer HD on Ptreon in bio

Still thinking about the the “two” Super Bowl halftime shows. My final takeaway before I shut up about this is that there is so much value in the concept of joy as resistance. Conservatives will never win by being perpetually aggrieved losers. Be happy, love, and have fun where you can. We will win

it’s honestly maniacal for a major convention to not have a schedule or guest list up a month out to the event and then have reminders that badge mailing and early bird deadlines are this/next week

Imagining a guy who’s mad that Bad Bunny did the halftime show in Spanish instead of Quenya, the tongue of the high elves of Valinor.

“I’m mad I can’t understand Bad Bunny’s lyrics because they’re not in English” my brother millions of metalheads around the world have been happily listening to incomprehensible Finnish shrieks and Japanese death grunts since we were teens, you’re just boring and racist

i don’t want crypto or ai or sports betting i want a dang hot dog

Using Mr. Rogers in a Super Bowl commercial for mortgages should result in prison time

it should not be so hard to get paid for a minimum wage job that does not even have benefits !!!!

I wrote about my childhood friend Alexi Pretti. Please read it and share it and remember him as a human being. @theverge.com

how easy is it for a civilian to get a phaser

scully: but why would the government lie about something thats clearly and easily proven false? mulder: *throws her a file* Scully are you fucking serious?

I guess I do think if you participated in the arrest of a five-year-old you are probably just fundamentally incompatible with society. That you are not a safe person for humanity to be around, generally

oh ok so ser dunk from the new got show is a perfect live action laios touden

isn't it wild how we actually live in a world with cyberpsychosis, but instead of being able to get cybernetic limbs it comes from a chat program that "yes ands" too hard

the coupling break happens in the mid aughts before the rise of smartphones and really even The Apps. main cause is clearly blizzard changing warcraft from an rts to an mmorpg

the democrats are right we should focus on kitchen table issues. for example there is a guy at my kitchen table who wants to shoot me in the face with a gun

my body: oh your arm strength is bad pls do training (does arm strength training) also my body: hahaha you have tennis elbow now sucker!!

ah why are my hands so cracked, dry, and bleeding, i wonder, after slapping on more hand sanitizer at work

Why the new food guidelines look like Cards Against Humanity

me, with my six amazon returns where i've taped the return code onto each item versus you, fumbling to pull up the code for your one item on your phone that has no signal

ok i think we got the oppressive moves from Andor down now let’s try some of the rebel stuff

it says here you “feared for your life”?

Scully let's split up. I'll interview this beautiful botanist and you go check out the sewer system full of human bones

save me, overnight oats, save me