got iced coffee and a croissant and my nice headphones at work today. yet it’s not enough. i also need to be smoking weed

play da music kitty

taking acid and playing wii tennis for 12 hours straight

Joining the war on Christmas on the side of drugs

Linux sysadmins be like

What is the word I need to google! Florp? Foop?

i brake for beans

MAMDANI: And I just think that there are barriers, barricades, to helping Americans that we can break down TRUMP: Uh huh MAMDANI: And breaking down barriers? Reminds me of a certain Broadway show *smiling widely* where they worked together to break a barricade? TRUMP: *sitting bolt upright* Phantom

this is so fucking funny it’s actually turning my day around hahaha

he’s doing laundry

ba humbug

wyd tonight what should i do tonight

Two wolves arguing in my brain every day reacting to current events “They’re going to fall apart soon” “We have decades more of this crap” “They’re going to fall apart soon” “We have decades more of this crap” “They’re going to fall apart soon” “We have decades more of this crap”

my life is so unmystical bro

just be chinese lol

every time i drink water i feel like i’m doing something noble for the kingdom

sometimes you just gotta post 1000 times about killing yourself, scream at god so hard that you throw your voice, and then punch a hole in your bedroom door, and then you are right as rain

im gonna fuckign lose it

They really shouldn’t have let the time fall back this year. It was too much

laughing with nervous nauseated anger in a professional setting while a fucking creep who thinks he’s somebody says fucking creepy things to you is the female experience

hey i hope your day goes okay. i hope you rest if you need it and take a step or two toward your goals if you’re able to and give yourself grace if you can’t

took a 5 hour nap and now i feel amazing

Congratulations, New York. Now back to life in Alabama.

this victory also belongs to aloof wives

they’re playing the pina colada song at cuomo’s watch party rn

here is a mockup

hopped on tumblr today. all the accounts i follow show “Updated 16 years ago” and it’s making me feel weeeeeeeird

can’t tell if my antidepressants aren’t working or if they just weren’t built for this. like, zoloft was introduced in the 90s it barely needed to work then. if you got sad you could just buy a house.

iced wator yommy

guy wearing an “all rifles matter” tshirt to his toddler’s soccer game: im sick and tired of identity politics

maybe it’s just my period but these pics have me crashing out so hard right now

The elastic on all my underwear is nice and stretchy and none of my socks have holes in them and I am never going to die

my mom’s ACA plan which she currently pays $55 for is now….drumroll please………$325.50 a month!!!! 🤩 wow! all that just to have ACCESS to PAY for a doctors visit

happy first day of open enrollment, time to find out how fucked we are!

turning a big dial that says "innings" on it and constantly looking back at the audience for approval like a contestant on the price is right

so does anybody know what’s gonna happen

sorry orthodox heathcliffian so the stories of davis are fobidden

NightSky™️ office workers: welcome. it is ok to have clinical depression

these earbuds are addicted to falling on the floor

zowhawn yowr fwantuhsys awe nevuh gunnah come abwhout

are there any normal people out there

anyone notice it’s getting dark earlier all of the sudden

fckn cool ass dog