mr. cannoli
@boner.ink
📤 39513
📥 1081
📝 12301
eyy woah pal, im postin’ ovah here support:
https://ko-fi.com/mrcannoli
cashapp: $mrcannoli
pinned post!
welcome to sexual twilight zone
about 3 years ago
16
468
63
what if i started posting memes, what if i was a meme guy
about 2 hours ago
7
32
0
i keep getting fatter but my dick stays the same size what's up with that
about 14 hours ago
5
60
3
siri how can i make you feel pain
about 19 hours ago
0
47
4
constructing a monument to my failures, probably going to fuck it up
1 day ago
1
40
6
i'm a fraud, i'm no farter, i haven't even farted in 7 years
1 day ago
4
56
1
i'm only gonna kick half of your ass because i'm nice
1 day ago
2
30
3
covering myself in carrion and laying in the desert waiting for the vultures to pick me clean
1 day ago
1
25
3
in the dark grabbing for 2 out of 6 pill bottles hoping i get the right ones
1 day ago
0
26
1
lots of creatures out tonight, owl hooting from the backyard to at least 2 other owls, a rattlesnake in the dark somewhere, and something just knocked over neighbors trash bin and scurried away probably some kind of mythical beast
1 day ago
1
21
1
that's not very buddha of you bro
2 days ago
1
51
7
i'm like 10% of a person, it would take 10 of me to complete a Task
2 days ago
1
25
2
i'm body negative, i don't think anyone should have a body
2 days ago
6
175
25
we should all get together and have a baby, the global baby
2 days ago
11
113
13
i'd sell my soul to the devil for so cheap it's crazy he hasn't tried some shit on me yet
3 days ago
2
40
5
3 strokes, bing bang boom just like that, then i nut
3 days ago
3
36
4
they should make a car that goes to space, they should let me escape
3 days ago
1
34
4
Mr. Ahmadinejad, welcome to the resistance
3 days ago
0
27
3
i just gotta come up with a billion dollar idea, or steal one...
3 days ago
2
23
0
i keep getting a little feeling like i want to be productive, but then it passes
3 days ago
1
20
1
i was the worm in question, and she did not love me
4 days ago
1
78
6
playing the gay little pokemon life sim, living my gay little pokemon life
4 days ago
0
44
2
i'll be the first to admit i was wrong, horse year fucking sucks
5 days ago
3
96
11
having a slide whistle implanted into my penis so it goes up when hard and down when soft
5 days ago
3
68
12
they put an asshole on a grape
6 days ago
7
93
13
how much nothing do i have to do to get someone to fix my life for me
6 days ago
2
45
8
i'm on the good bad diet, where every time you eat you alternate between a good thing (fruit, salad, carrots) and a bad thing (12 donuts, stick of butter, gravy boat, etc)
7 days ago
2
59
8
every night i go outside and watch the stars and smoke weed and talk to myself like an insane person
7 days ago
5
90
8
my name is bond, fat james bond
7 days ago
1
93
8
i'm going to be the first fat james bond
7 days ago
9
208
21
poopshit son or pisspee daughter
8 days ago
3
59
12
can a man who posts constantly about shitting and jacking off ever find love
8 days ago
7
95
6
i've returned from the shit dimension, and i got special new pooping and peeing powers
add a skeleton here at some point
9 days ago
6
206
16
portal opened in the toilet but i'm scared to go in
10 days ago
5
57
4
there are some unspoken perks when you have literally no money for an entire decade, for instance debt collectors have to go fuck themselves
10 days ago
1
57
0
it took 12 years of no payments for my student loans to finally head for default, here's to another 12 years
10 days ago
5
89
0
if you believe in yourself hard enough you can't die no matter what you do
11 days ago
2
56
12
something incredible is going to happen tomorrow
11 days ago
4
42
3
i have the discipline of a 4 year old
11 days ago
1
52
7
why do i easily lose 8 hours to video game but not to anything productive ever
11 days ago
4
63
1
can't post playing video game
12 days ago
2
36
1
anyways guess i have one of these now
add a skeleton here at some point
13 days ago
9
116
0
opening the locked case for a customer and slamming it into their head and then smashing a folding chair on them and then getting out the ladder for a body slam
13 days ago
1
38
3
none of the wizard of oz characters had a dick and balls, interesting none of them were questing for that
14 days ago
6
95
11
the chuds will inherit the earth
14 days ago
2
26
3
i don't remember any conversation i've ever had
14 days ago
4
40
1
i was a bee in my past life, fucked some flowers, stung some dipshit and then died
14 days ago
6
54
2
app made by stupid fucking idiot morons, for stupid fucking idiot morons
14 days ago
4
48
2
looks like a guy who went to prison for sports betting the day before sports betting became legal and mandatory
add a skeleton here at some point
14 days ago
2
81
8
single and ready to single
14 days ago
2
45
3
finally deleted my ex, messages, pictures, total block dead to me forever, who want me
14 days ago
2
51
1
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