Soup of the day: Blood

I’d get sworn in on a Wendy’s Baconator

ok it is finally time to watch Lethal Weapon (1987). hope something explodes

ok I am finishing Lethal Weapon

buddy, this isn’t Threads, you don’t need to pretend to be a dipshit so people yell at you here

I’d get sworn in on a Wendy’s Baconator

they’re letting me say the line “wow this looks like the Avengers’ Doomsday” in the film Avengers: Doomsday (2026)

types of superheroes - head powers guy - body powers guy - hand powers guy - suit guy - gun guy - knife guy - ??? girl maybe idk

please, Mr. Wehadababyitsaboy is my father. call me Collect

I have subjugated the fascist Injustice Superman and forced him to present me my post-work joint every day

ME: team rocket will never steal these rare Pokémon! Not unless they wanna take on me and my fully evolved Miss Cigarettes! MISS CIGARETTES: miss cigarettes

I was too comfortable and tired so I fell asleep halfway through Lethal Weapon and I slept so good. I was perhaps too chilled out. I should not have been stretched out so hard or smoking that huge joint. god it rocked

ok it is finally time to watch Lethal Weapon (1987). hope something explodes

Hey HARLAN what’s that you’re writing “Er it’s…it’s my masterpiece short form fiction. It’s called ‘I have no mouth, and I must scream” and it’s about the moral entanglement of free will and morality vis a vis arti- Okay dork, sounds good. Meanwhile I have a mouth, and I drink Jim Beam!!

Everyone knows years are genetically immutable. I will happily call "2026" by its birth name (2025) in a show of defiance against Calendar Ideology

the WOKES want you to call the year “2026” now

The Japanese Hero The Golden Bat Will Return In Avengers Doomsday

at last I can publish my Nancy Drew, The Shadow, The Japanese Hero The Golden Bat and The Dog Version Of Betty Boop crossover legally

the WOKES want you to call the year “2026” now

"Ooh, January 1. Better get going on those taxes, Neddy."

fell asleep and dreamt about buying a pack of cigarettes. sounds grim

2025

only important part of my “bluesky wrapped”

got excited for the possibilities of the new year and then immediately developed a blinding migraine so. gonna try to ignore that as a sign

if you start Road House at 11 pm you’ll be watching a badass movie at midnight

my new year’s resolution is to get revenge

Assatar: Fire And Ass

gonna be watching Lethal Weapon (1987) for the first time in the morning but I’m gonna be shaking my head the whole time so you know I think Mel Gibson sucks ass

today’s Hell Zone Feature is Firepower (1993) and I’m just gonna leave this description here

no one’s ever been mad at me, in my entire life

today’s Hell Zone Feature is Firepower (1993) and I’m just gonna leave this description here

woke up this morning to a text from my dad like “in 2027 we’re moving to Phoenix” and I’m just like uh you got someone else in your pocket or something, who is this “we”

Gen Z sees what was taken from them

this is the plot of “Massacre At Central High” (1976)

oh yeah let me just “flirt” with my “crush”. like an idiot baby. I am an adult

just gonna arbitrarily list a bunch of movies I’m gonna watch so that I remember to watch them -Firepower (1993) -Lethal Weapon (1987) -Outland (1981) -Picasso Trigger (1988) -Gymkata (1985) -Phantasm V: Ravager (2016) -Resident Evil (2002)

no deal, Netflix. this only ends one way: in blood

just thought about posting something but then I remembered I’m a cool person who doesn’t need to do that shit 😎

well in the morning I guess I’m watching Firepower (1993)

*jolting suddenly awake and bolting rigidly upright in bed* I am going to get into an argument on the internet

watched CYBORG tonight, a movie that only exists because Cannon had already sunk $2 million dollars into costumes for HE-MAN 2 and SPIDER-MAN and now couldn't make either. Pyun wrote it in a weekend and shot it in 23 days. a dude lost his eye, possibly in a shot IN the movie?

bold new proposal for the new year: I win

Enjoy youtu.be/P5m8lj5DCtI?...

just got word that Bluesky moderation is about to ban my famous catchphrase, “What Is This, St. Louis?”, so you’d better buy these limited edition t-shirts I had made before I’m not allowed to sell them anymore

I would never live on a giant turtle’s back. that sounds too challenging for me

I could produce my pod cast or I could play every video game ever made *looks into the camera, lowers sunglasses* what do you think I’m gonna do