Amish quilt motif lower back tattoo

obtained a great blue heron hat

dogs are so beast because they eat vigorously and then lay down immediately after

making a facebook reel that shows a vaguely ethnic guy punching a giant shark that’s building a useless tool for pouring fake resin floors and going so viral the clout causes me to instantly kill myself

staring at my dog

Olivia, you’ve changed..

Captain - the subject appears to have "dropped trou", purposefully exposing the buttocks in a mocking fashion. Requesting guidance as for how to proceed. Over.

vaping at work

today's all windy dindy and jangling chimes

come thru dawg. i think a new boil is forming on my ass

(staring at my work computer screen) that friday feeling

quick jaunt on the treadmill #iamfat

Berlin-Rome axis 🤔

catching a fake disease like ‘imposter syndrome’ would fix me

when all the lemmings jump off the cliff like that >>>

Forest gazing

source: bedtime is surrounding the protagonist of reality

here’s a solution. cut the fucking pipe out and replace it. lazy ass

McSloppy®️

the average american sells over 3000 lbs of garbage on facebook marketplace per year

taking my dog out so he can take a shit #nature

i would rather Stop Dead

To: My Boss Subject: On The Matter of Your Being a Charlatan

saw an ad that said you need to buy something ‘even if it means skipping a burger’

this synth music tape had the noooo you can't guy on it in 1995

either i’m paid 1 million dollars an hour or we abolish money. no in between

My best employee just asked for two days off to visit family. This is really hard, because we need her. But it’s the right thing to do: she’s fired.

walking into work with a nicotine patch on my neck

I remember having this book when I was very little & I think it worked because hell yeah, trees ARE nice

birds are outside making a lot of noise. they know winter’s blood is in the water and spring will arrive soon to feast

good

piping volcanic fumes into my office so i can have visions of #profit

i always dreamed of a $400 gas bill when i was a kid. the point is to never give up

it’s upsetting to me when a urinal has poor flushing performance. it’s shameful and an outrage

call me Robin the way my turd is migratorius

🔜 it’ll’ve been 50°F

(snapping a rubber glove on) almost time for lunch

Retiring to my bonus room for the evening

corporate creatures love using the word ‘cadence’ because they heard it on an NFL broadcast one time

thinking about going home from work soon

fuck off. how long do we have to put up with this

took monday off

just found out about ‘context’. seems like it would be very convenient to ignore it..

before the computer rich guys would just buy dinosaur skeletons and leave you alone

Drafts dump. Free for all to use due to how magnanimous i am

It’s illegal to frighten me