🚨 NASA has BANNED astronaut Martin Waulf from bringing his three-screen gooning rig aboard the Artemis II. “Gooning is not conducive to a productive lunar mission,” said NASA Commander Ed Branch. LIKE and SHARE if you think astronauts should be allowed to #GoonOnTheMoon!

Shrinking a hat in the microwave

New cigarettes just dropped

So basically my job is to wait around and get hungry

Hey, this your gelatinous cube?

Saw some weird nerd shit on the internet

Thirty Helens would never agree with this

Had a light lunch so all I can think about is how to combine everything in my fridge as soon as I get home

That really corns my beef

your order has shipped

What were they, thinking?

As a kid the exterior scenes in Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory left me with a strange impression of what the 1970s were like

Can we dump this fucking loser already

Unfortunately sips do cost now

Growned beef

Utterly Charming Lesbians

Soft serve frozen beef tallow

Entering week three of waking up with Psychedelic Shack in my head

Opening a box of butter and shaking out a stick like a cigarette

Do this

Huffin on that herb that made uncle buck

Hot dog is a snack. Source: snack bar

Buying good old gogs at gog got gom

Hamnet was killed by time travelers sent to spare the seventeenth century from history’s most insufferable nepo theatre

Every Friday is a miracle #efiam

Junk food is short for jopped unc food

whatever. i want a thing of candy

My globular meal

Bro… did you just brexit me?

So many things happening behind my muted words and phrases this week

Soaring into the week’s end

Found out I was a highlander when a weird guy tried to cut my head off

Recreational salt tablets

My name is Robblo

Puffin on that shrub that made cheez-it snap’d

Meeting a Stranger in the Alps | Pornhub

History’s greatest blunders any% speedrun

Thanos “where did that bring you? back to me” speech delivered by the face on a can of spaghettios

Keep honking, I’m unable to communicate outside the frame of parody bumper stickers

Hey what’s up just noticed you haven’t posted an opinion about writing in cursive yet if you could put that up before eod that’d be great thanks so much

Inserting the netflix disc into my nintendo wii to watch america’s pastime, the big leagues, the majors themselves, major league baseball, “the show”

Q: What does Dave Navarro see out of the corner of his eye? A: His Perry Farrell vision

Fartshaming my fruitwife

The globular village

Spaghettio corn dog

I’m securing commitments

I get all my news from the jingling keys