if democrats want to win, they need to run guys with harleys who wear shirts that say ‘if you’re reading this, the bitch fell off’

the uprising of the burgers...

of course mcconnell saw everybody having fun and decided to ruin it

*turning to my s/o* Change of plans, I have to post all day

i love that we can finally say one of these evil fucks shitted themselves to death and it might actually be true

good morning :)

looks fancy but it would still eat a cigarette

Getting diarrhea like, "Hope this isn't the diarrhea that was on the news"

a surefire way to meet new people is to go on a connection app and shit on everyone for not messaging you

look closely.... can you spot the cat in this photo

alright. good talk

What if this is the one that’s right

me watching love island

my work in progress looks like a slug

Chris made a delivery to the Air Force base today

I’ve thought about this tweet so often I had to go look it up

they destroyed mike in a futile attempt to pass fred off as straight

new hand dropped. they’re calling it the most ever

I gotta be honest. This ruined my life a little

he’s been dead for a month and nobody’s noticed yet

Grocery store cashier: Do you need a bag? Me, having not spoken to another person in real life for a week: I don’t know, big doggie :)

I’m fucking sobbing

do you think a lot of court eunuchs had crazy vocal fry

Why does there have to be kissing in The Terminator?

i don’t love sports but i love seeing people love things

this is the origin of horse girl

Lawyers. Love em or hate em, it's up to you. Let me know what you decide.

As a disabled person, seeing George Santos aggressively pushing for bouncing on your boy's dick scares me.

thank goodness theyre fireWORKS and not fireUNEMPLOYED har har let's go brandon

my grapes are long, do u even care

just found out about all of this countrys countless sins and had to spit out the three hot dogs I was eating at the same time

FUCK

at the cookout. gf’s cousin says he wants to join the sophet’s army of pervert mercenaries. “for the glory of Tanit and Eschmoun” he says. Well ok. are you a pervert i asked. yes big time he replied. thats why i want to join the army of pervert mercenaries

she HATES art

if you don’t eat a hot dog on the 4th, the hot dog man will come for you

happy birthday hotdogs

when the fireworks start early but you are 100 years old

I would kill or die for Larry

kinda answered your own question there, bud

Like many of us she values stability

Asking how people can partake in joyful acts during a period of immense suffering leads me to believe this is your first time at the suffering rodeo.

Incredible things happening in the transvestigation community