I just compared a current NFL offense to this car: the Suzuki V6 Escudo Pikes Peak Special ’98 from Gran Turismo 2. IYKYK If you know what this car does, what you can do with it, & STILL win races, you'll know what team I'm talking about with a certain young QB. It's in my article tomorrow!

oh HELL YEAH, this is a top-five sandwich in my book

i will never "hand it to Lauren Boebert", because: A) she's awful, and B) i don't know where her hands have been but I will slide it across a table to her

and on this day, the "Carson Wentz scale" was born

A few months ago I wrote about why it’s important that MAGA’s alternate reality has been penetrated by Trump’s refusal to expose the Epstein conspiracy, which has been central to the American fascist narrative. badfaithtimes.com/why-the-epst...

this is the most fucked up alternate timeline version of Dexter: New Blood where instead of Peter Dinklage and serial killers, it's Jeffrey Epstein and a bunch of pedophiles

probably something an innocent man would do

Olivia Benson would have gotten to the bottom of this shit in like, 45 minutes TOPS

So on Epstein, the Democratic position should be "Trump should resign." If you are a Democratic elected, practice saying "We demand the president's resignation" in front of a mirror as many times as it takes until the dry-heaving that comes from having a phobia about actually doing politics passes.

With alt text.

I won’t lie, it’s getting more difficult to write about fantasy football each week with the world careening more and more into chaos It feels so unimportant in the grand scheme of things

meanwhile, on the other hellscape, the fantasy platform Sleeper is posting racist memes

Hell yeah

it’s a GREAT book and I learned a ton from reading it, especially about Tommy John being so supportive of Melissa Ludtke covering the Dodgers in the late 70’s HIGHLY recommended!

Woody Marks is AFC Rachaad White. He SHOULDN'T lead the HOU in rush att. in '26, but probably will BAD rush efficiency metrics: Of 43 qualifying RB: - 42nd in success rate - 42nd in YaC/Att - 41st in EPA/Att Rec. stuff not as bad: Among 29 RB w/ 20+ targets: - 12th - 1.31 YPRR - 18th - 17% TPRR

Woody Marks is AFC Rachaad White. He SHOULDN'T lead the HOU in rush att. in '26, but probably will BAD rush efficiency metrics: Of 43 qualifying RB: - 42nd in success rate - 42nd in YaC/Att - 41st in EPA/Att Rec. stuff not as bad: Among 29 RB w/ 20+ targets: - 12th - 1.31 YPRR - 18th - 17% TPRR

Jim Downey? The principal from Billy Madison?

fuck all of them with an iron rod

I think if you were to ask me if would I rather start a franchise with Jordan Love or Jaxson Dart, that could be a real conversation

love the Packers CB6 having a 26.3% targets per route run tonight

Has LaFleur said "it starts with me" yet? I'm one away from bingo

love the Packers CB6 having a 26.3% targets per route run tonight

somebody just called Jordan Love's game tonight an "assterpiece" and I laughed for a solid 45 seconds

just 20 points for the Packers in their last 17 possessions over two games (both losses) that's how you do it, folks

you can't trust Brandon McManus on a plane, but get him a Greyhound out of Green Bay

maybe Aaron Rodgers had a point when he'd constantly bicker with LaFleur about playcalling

like.. a shotgun handoff to Josh Jacobs on 4th down was your playcall eat my ass LaFleur, that was garbage

the Packers are scared to win, scared to lose, and are happy to just exist in purgatory

lmao oh my god

play action... my god, yeah watch out for that draw on third down when backed up to your own goal line

(not the Packers' CB6)

The main point of contention for the Packers over the last couple of seasons has been: Who do you throw the ball to when you need multiple plays with the game on the line?

i'm actually shocked they're going to get it back

Packers folding like they’re Senate Democrats.

Packers aren't getting the ball back

quoting Zach Jacobson is pretty problematic

if i were the Packers, I would just run my offense like I was down 10-0 with 8 minutes left the entire game but that's just me

gotta make sure you take 6 minutes off of this clock for the field goal attempt

Packers down 10:

lol

I'm sure this is Rich Bisaccia's fault somehow

that's just good coverage there by Mitchell, damn he's good

Wicks is the best receiver on the team and the Packers treat him like he has Ebola every week he's healthy

mercifully, bo melton will not be on here

...and suddenly, it was Week 11. Oh, hi, didn't see you there! What, this? This is the Week 11 waiver wire column. You know, because the playoffs and trade deadlines are coming sooner than people think. Come on, stay ready so you don't have to get ready optimusfantasy.com/week-11-waiv...

sorry folks, throwing a ball to a cornerback on 4th down means you're not a serious team