Bigotry is so brain melting that some Tennessee rescue won't let a friend of friend adopt a dog because she lives within 20 miles of Dearborn.

That’s right

In data science we call this problem "overfitting." The author, David frum's son, has memorized a bunch of facts about Normal Men without understanding the deeper relationships between those facts. Thus he has weak predictive power when trying to say other normal things.

They’re literally called manholes, folks. What do you expect to see coming out of them? Giant columns of noxious steam? Because that can also be arranged

WHO CARES

This guy is going to be responsible for an event they’re calling 18/22

this is my kind of company motto right here

Dollar tickets with no devices is a fair trade. For regular ticket prices you should be able to skip a song

“I’m Jeff Epstein but it’s not what you think—I don’t know any famous people.”

That's so funny! I hope they're all throwing up for days afterward.

This is 4′33″ for people who don’t have their kids’ current addresses

Which group of violent men does Elon think he's in

💕

Science has made it possible to actually "hear" the music of the spheres but it's just the Curb Your Enthusiasm outro

Comfort sells itself

It’s fine 👍 All good.

The car alarms, folks. They're getting louder and longer. What are we doing about this

I came to a point last night where I wrote and deleted an em dash, but then I thought “I can’t let the computer rule me; I *would* put an em dash there” and added it back in. Of course I later rewrote the entire sentence anyway, but it’s the principle of the thing.

The Agenda 21 vampires in Brussels want to stop you from honking. Lay on your horn if you still believe in America.

mamdani delivered, while you gave up hope

Absolutely breathtaking interaction

Live via satellite from the surface of the sun

I guess we were due for another round of “cheating on your partner is actually very normal and overhated” discourse

No, we’re not calling it that

Oh so now it's illegal to sue yourself for $2 billion and distribute that money to a bunch of pedophiles and family annihilators who tried to burn down the Capitol and install you as dictator? That's not allowed anymore? This used to be a free country.

[hands corn maze guy $50] make sure I never come out

tl;dr: Alabama's ability to administer a new congressional map disenfranchising Black voters has been complicated by the fact that Alabama is celebrating Jefferson Davis's birthday today.

(texting my friend Evil Larry) me: what's up dude Larry: matters most vile

stonks :-)

masterful rejoinder sir

Me trying to encourage people to join me in the haunted yellow wallpaper dimension:

In the grim cyber-future hackers will be known as askers

How interesting we see so many "will they/won't they" global trade situations created that allow insiders to play the market like a fiddle. How interesting this keeps happening lately.

We’ve sent in our fastest talker. They call him the Auctioneer.

Oh, really? That’s a bummer. Still, what’s the latest they could reopen it, July 1?

i've still got a barrel or two in my basement. happy to tap it if it helps

You don’t need to announce it but otherwise this is completely fair

When the Roku citizens watch tv, the side scrolling background is of our world

Just imagine how many times this guy hit someone with the "you're so money and you don't even know it" quote

Trey Gowdy always looks like he's still being born

This is in the movie, I saw it

Sometimes there's satisfaction from seeing a predictable character arc executed at a high level

Always worrying to see classic brands stoop to the hard sell like this. If they swapped out “Being Straight” for “Coca-Cola” you’d expect layoffs to be announced soon

I'm the guy in charge of writing headlines. What I do is picture one specific person in my mind and then think of how I could make them feel the maddest they've ever been in their entire life.

truly impossible to overstate how bad things are if a self-described conservative republican at scalia law is even considering not working for a republican federal government

I knew the Breadwinner was doomed when I saw how prominently the Toyota brand was featured. Nothing against the cars but you have to decide whether you’re trying to make me laugh or get me in a Corolla.

if you hit a ball into the mashed potatoes you win the game