This is just what you like to see on here

Mmm, that's good The Pitt

I keep all my paperwork in cans, so

One of my favorite things about Star Trek is when Beverly Crusher is like Jean-Luc, I know this sounds crazy but we’re all trapped inside a dog’s dream, and Picard — responsible for thousands of lives — is like, Beverly you are my best friend obviously I believe you were are making this top priority

I want to watch the new Pitt, but after spending a week and a half sick with bacterial pneumonia, I’m not sure I’m ready to dive back into the Illness Cinematic Universe

His conscience is entirely vestigial but he knows the difference between good TV and bad TV.

*Super Smash Bros. announcer voice* Dark Abundance

What?

After playing fetch for ~5 minutes the dog always starts looking at me like “Wow, you really like this game, huh? Well, if you insist…” Buddy, you brought me the bone.

“Am I a fascist dumbass? Yes, of course. But there’s an art to these things.”

Remember he loves staring at his electoral map and handing out printed copies of it. It must make him really angry when he looks at the Midwest and sees two blue states breaking up all the red. I hope one night he thinks about it too much.

Is this chicken soup for the soul? Or is it regular style for the stomach

showering up with man bodywash for men, eating a bowl of man cereal for men, driving to work in my 9 ft tall man truck for men, typing into man excel for men, coming back home and walking my man dog for men, getting a call from my mom that my man mom for men died, making funhimeral arrangements for

Why would there be boxes of evidence for an act of self-defense at his house 🤔

36 people have died at ICE's hands in the past year may of these deaths did not happen on camera, but it does not make them any less horrifying and unacceptable this is a list of their names, where they lived before being abducted, and a link to crowdfunding if i can find it

I saw this video of a Vietnam vet in the fur coat yelling at ICE and thought to myself, "this is missing something," before I realized, "Ah, of course, the Ether instrumental. It's so obvious."

Happy Friday to you guys

Cereal was never emasculated. Cereal is for children and/or adults who don’t care.

America is yearning for "it."

trying to explain to jd vance why it's bad that renee good was killed by federal agents: ok, so, imagine that she was a squirrel belonging to an IG/onlyfans influencer,

My money’s on the little guy. He’s got chutzpah.

They’re incapable of following a basic political script and feigning empathy or remorse in moments of tragedy. They can’t even try to look like the bigger people. There’s too much evil inside them and they consider it cringe to disguise it.

Imagine how angry or afraid you’d have to be to kill someone. Now imagine if all it took to make you feel that way was someone turning *away* from you. These are the people they’re sending out to patrol our streets with guns and masks.

It’s so important to preserve physical media

JD Vance is too stupid to know why the administration had him do the full-throated defense from a podium of the shooting.

not sure Jonathan Ross released his video to be exculpatory so much as to show off that he got to murder someone your average X user might not like

Ross is one of their top guys remember

No one is doing more than Musk to convince everyone that white men must be eradicated

here’s a little joke i tweeted once that i just thought of again: is there a lazier named organ than the liver? lord have mercy (new part)

many are saying "China in five"

If you’re using Grok as a source for reporting you are at best a half-step above making shit up

so on bf so forth gf

We need to know all their names and faces because they’re all going to kill someone if you leave them out there long enough.

“We had whistles. They had guns.”

Here’s my new paper on why the music you liked when you were 20 is still cool, your parents are going to get re-married, snacking is actually the key to a trimmer waistline, and above all, line always goes up.

Leaving my house with the ‘don’t tread on me’ flag on it, putting on my mask and tactical gear, strapping on my weapon, and roaming the cities and towns that didn’t vote for my favorite candidate as an armed anonymous agent of the state kidnapping and shooting people who I don’t like the look of.

you know how if you try and make LLMs more racist, they also end up more sexist and pro-genocide? this is the human example of that. evil isn't a single thing, if you start down one path you keep ending up at the same destination.

Damn, well I got pretty close

Garfield still looks like that in the dimension where Pikachu still looks like this

need to be like this

They're adding Disgaea Item Dungeons to Coke Freestyle machines you can venture 200 floors into root beer to unlock Tropical Barq's now

If a snake got a sore back that would be a fucking nightmare

This administration is so dedicated to making every scary story conservatives ever told themselves about the government really happen

Here's the full moment of silence including a fan yelling "Go home, ICE"

Why should being in the vicinity of your own country’s security forces be an inherently dangerous situation? Are they like rabid dogs or something?