it real later baybee

Mother is mothering again

Runnah UESC wants to move bedtime up an houha! MIDA says no sleep til revolution. Stay up late. Midnight oil. Dusk til dawn. Cock a doodle do or die. You know what to do QUEST In a single run: 🔳 Play your gameboy under the covers and don’t get caught 🔳 Pretend to be asleep when Orion checks on you

thanks to AI our slow and humiliating national suicide will be punctuated by visual media that is so good even a dog could jack off to it

One time I asked a girl "So what pickup lines actually work on girls" and she said this word for word

semi-weekly tirade when the people on the news spell orc with a k. always ends with sleeping in the spare bog as he pounds down bizarre reagents all night with the will-o-the-wisps

when fruit-on-the-bottom yogurt first came out when i was a kid, i definitely ate all the disgusting thick plain yogurt first. the move was then to mainline the pie filling on the bottom to send one’s psyche into a brief sugar tilt-state

~mjq jazz bar who

~mjk jazz car

performative tavern wench friend has been carrying the same frothing tankards of ale around the room for 30 minutes now

judge: You are obviously guilty and have shown no remorse. Yet out of compassion i will allow you to walk free, on the condition that you are able to name either a snack or a bug, but not both. me: mothmallow judge: You get one more try me: skittles and a locust

found God. they were in the back of the fridge, festering and forgotten behind an expired jar of horseradish cremé. they were laughing soundlessly, chest heaving with the effort of hysteric mirth. tears streamed from unblinking eyes, bulging with a mania unimaginable; infinite. closed the fridge.

Jesus Christ smashing the moneylenders' shit, just busting them up big time, up and down the temple, that's the original carpenter brut imo

the boy from the boy is mine music video is on this season of high potential and that means every wednesday pm we holler about that boy at the tv. how is the old boy this week. the boy is mine boy is boy no more but man, albeit still someone’s mine. she beat brandy and monica, i really respect that

when fruit-on-the-bottom yogurt first came out when i was a kid, i definitely ate all the disgusting thick plain yogurt first. the move was then to mainline the pie filling on the bottom to send one’s psyche into a brief sugar tilt-state

LEARNED HAND: i’m the most quoted lower court judge by scotus NOBLE HAND: i’m his cousin, i was also a judge and said ulysses fucks and that’s ok SLOW HAND: duhhhhh we rejoice cause the hurting is so painless from the distance of passing cars

*Sade voice*

got early access to DLSS 5 and personally i think it looks incredible, check this out:

never shoulda smoked that shit now im in an MF DOOM interlude [old timey radio voice] the villain uses many weapons against his enemies *metallic thud* [tom and jerry sample] YEEEEEEOUCH

me: hey minotaur who wears a crimson cloak with golden arabesque trim and says naught but "Vanitas" when addressed by man. whats good minotaur who wears a crimson cloak with a golden arabesque trim and says naught but "Vanitas" when addressed by man: (craning neck astern to regard me) 𝐕𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐬.

imprisoned baddie in the checkerboard prison wing of vaporwave dimension. doing time like two days: day she go in day she come out. time rapidly dilating around the baddie as society passes her by. bangers flowing through/around her until she is little more than a spider on two legs. perfect weapon

[mom voice] melinda bladeburgers you come down here right this instant and explain yourself

also 1989, 1999, 2009 and 2019

PROFESSOR XAVIER ON LETTERBOXD REVIEWING THE GREY ZONE (2001): This happened to my buddy Erik

the real reason AI Chat Bots are popular is that it allows a normal person to have a rich person's experience: to give vague instructions to a subordinate and then tell them "no, that's not right" over and over until the subordinate finally guesses right

THIEL (red eyes, veins bulging): Mind if I say some stuff that you'd walk away from at a bus stop?

THE ADVERSARY (DANNY MCBRIDE): What’s up Job, you pious dick? Looks like you got too many kids and cattle and not enough sore boils up in this bitch.

I am going to become the snowker

please wait. synchronizing homer

it is wednesneigh my dudes

COLOR OUT OF SPACE (2019)

[ringing] hon hon hon, hon hon hon