Ha! This fellow hath ahhh buh hmm rather this beauteous lady hath an excellent wit!

the gators in my moat have unionized

Sea of Rays

Sitting on the couch with a gun and blasting roaches

can i get some of those sweet and tastey breverages

for the boys

sleepy kitties in your area!

carelessly whipping my vorpal sword around at my gfs work christmas party

hey siri am I convalescing rn

Black Sweater (2017) by Malcolm T Liepke

Ways to enter a room, ranked: 4. Door - Boring 3. Window - Not bad, but you can do better 2. Crashing through the wall - Respectable but deriviative 1. Hacking through the floorboards with a fire axe - Now we're talking

Bumbling around drunk at 1am sorting flower pots in the backyard. Some nice mixed messages for the new neighbors

Dragged that sucker probably 300ft before he shook loose. Dark out, foggy as fuck

is it dangerous to quaff antipoison not poisoned reddit

New meds say don’t take if you’re quaffing more than 3 potions a day. Make me

This side up tramp stamp

ough

in retrospect Termite Greg may not have been the best one to take the group holiday photo

Sometimes I feel like my battle droids dont really think I’m that funny

Smelting pig iron in my guest bedroom. Gonna sell it at the farmers market

The fish and wildlife people keep knocking on my door about my personal air mail system. Nice try. Im releasing the hounds

If I ever see John Joel Glanton I’m gonna split his head to the thrupple

Retiring to my rooms, carrying an entire toilet under my arm

Might fuck around and become notorious… except Im to shy

In the Garden (2011) by Fernando Botero

Leaving the kickback with a bindle over my shoulder and nobody there ever seeing me again

if you like having good clean fun on here go ahead and smash that follow playa

Gotta swing by the grocery realm later

100+ soft drink cans raining from my overhead bin and bashing up my fellow passengers

Roz item drops: bones (100%) 1-3 green onions (50%) runpleminze shooter (only drops during holiday event 5%) glasses (rare! 1%)

capt'n should we raise the awooga

All the children in the village know the gentle sound of the beetle cart bell. They rush into the road “beetle cart! Beetle cart!”

beetle cart

Knuckle tat GOOD TIME

Moat big mistake in retrospect. Could’ve slain any of these assailants way faster than it takes to skim out the bodies. Getting a quote from a gator guy on Monday

boss: we are going to place you on a performance improvement plan. Me: …(Extremely deep voice) wakarimashita My boss: …lol. Yokatta nayo

Contractors fucked up big time. Now the oubliette is the biggest room in my castle

Any of you guys wanna play arcanists?

uncle political compass with axes "cryptic - overt" and "beer - weed"

Gnashing my teeth in a chill ass way

Smiling, eyes closed, drawn irresistibly to the warm blue glow and heavenly hum of gods own bug zapper

ace of hearts

Finished my coffee. Guess I’ll clock in. (I climb to the roof and start rotating, my arms outstretched to indicate the direction of the winds)

Lifting my gigantic sippy cup in both hands to take a drink of spright

Sun Dogs

when I'm eating yummy food and going "mm mmM MMM!" that's the real me

Moving to a new earthen mound. Got to get off my ass and pack up my trophies and pelts and such

Im in the pit hanging out with the beasts of the pit. But I am not of the pit tho

Smaug the defiler but instead of a hoard of dwarven treasure he’s got like $2k in checking

Coherent light service weapon.