guy who knows how bad an idea it is to create even the slightest chance of President Musk

Dad stepping outside with his morning coffee and surveying the timeline; “We really needed this discourse”

MY CHILD, 2043: today we were learning about the elections from when you were growing up, and how Joe Biden tried to run with dementia, and Democrats almost won anyway but they made Tim Walz stop saying “weird” ME, STRAPPING A BOMB TO MYSELF: was that in a textbook and if so who’s the publisher

”out of pocket”-ness has been at an all time high this last week

feels like Republicans worked themselves into getting mad at anything fun if a Democrat did it, so they decided when they’re in power they should make us as mad as they were. hopefully they notice no one, them included, is actually having fun anymore

a lot of urban housing discourse makes a lot more sense when you realize that, even if they’ve since learned more sophisticated urban understanding, a lot of people started with “gentrification is when trendiness happens”

cook him

Happy 100th birthday, Mel Brooks! Here’s some great advice he gave me back he was a wee lad of 95. www.newyorker.com/culture/the-...

Iran knockout round qualification was 95% done

Missouri Compromise is the clear winner here imo

she disgrace on my gijón til I advance

just say 18 new techniques, what are we doing here

RANDOM ADULTS AT THE FAMILY REUNION:

I actually got inseminated in the counterfeit Burger King in Pittsburgh’s South Side, I just didn’t write an article about it

I’ll post more photos later, but I wanted to share these cars right away. The American Sign Museum in Cincinnati might well be my favorite museum.

of course testudo looks like he's holding his tummy like it hurts

I should’ve saved this for a more collective special occasion (opened it because finally got a job interview lined up), partly because it’s really good, but mostly because I am now realizing a wine bottle of a Belgian quad that I can’t foist on anyone else is a “smoke the whole pack” situation

real

the guy who texts the group chat at 1am because we’re all doing our own thing but he wants to hit to another bar:

culver’s and jeni’s are both good. I am enlightened centrist

oh man, I can’t believe that account with 150 followers says I shouldn’t go to the beer store. I’m gonna spend half an hour getting mad about it instead of going to the beer store

this is just trenchant analysis. “being a Seattle sports fan makes me a better politics knower” etc etc

incredible headline. “HIT THE FUCKING DECK, BOSS HAD AN IDEA”

gotta imagine Trump reading these like

this strikes me as being about our trust in politicians, rather than anything they’re doing. we trust Mamdani will go to the limit of what’s possible, so we infer a rent freeze is that; we don’t trust, say, Chuck Schumer to go to the limit, so we infer the Senate minority simply has modest goals

immediate entry into the canon for Best Responses To My Bullshit

GTA 6 is just two nicknames for Toronto

jumping in on the new personality quiz

I think this is a better-articulated version of what some people actually believe than those people themselves could muster (with or without chatgpt helping them)

not what a dental dam is

name and label art means this is gonna be the most 7/10 craft beer of your life

yeah yeah, it’s all nonsense, but it does strike me that “cut the reflecting pool liner with a knife so the president will come out and inspect it personally” is something that would happen in a Hitman game

mufos when I try to compare the seahawks (who won the super bowl) to the steelers

JORKIN DEPEANITS VANCE YOU GET BACK HERE BEFORE I TAN YOUR *bang* GOTDANGIT BOY YOU MADE ME TRIP ON ONE OF MY PORCH GUNS

Weiser internal, but boy does the “where are they now” montage for 2020 presidential candidates get more dire by the year

skill issue. WOM went to Europe and has fallen in love roughly 200 times (unknown reciprocation rate but it’s above zero)

now that consoles are appreciating assets, we should stop making them and preserve the character of our gaming neighborhood.

boy howdy

[putting one foot up on a desk chair with a cool andor jacket slung over my shoulder] hi, I’m counterfax. if you know me, you know my brain is sturdy like large oak table. but let’s talk about something that isn’t sturdy: our democratic institutions

i think that a harder truth is that woke 1's death didn't so much occur through backlash as much as the movie cliche of "I won't shoot you, but he will" youtu.be/6fhWZORatBA?...

Tom Kean is taking invisibility treatments

I’m gonna keep on dancing at the

in the universe with an RFK Jr presidency this is what they have instead of craft beer

when did we all start saying aircon