.o　O　　0　 o　　O ° 　 ┌┐ ______ ___| |_| 🦧 | ┌═══════┐ (　 =\ |══|═|==|　□　 □　| /_⊙⊙═══◎◎ ╙⊙⊙═⊙⊙┘ . . . . . .

Jane Goodall taught me it was ok to have 39 different behaviour patterns, including tool usage, grooming and courtship behaviours, customary or habitual in some communities but absent in others where ecological explanations have been discounted.

dude youve gotta check out writing. they put talking into a squiggle

have you guys heard the one without the punchline

toast is cattle feed. they invented toast to control us. hold on the toaster just dinged. untoasted bread is poison. they want to take away our toast,

petting my cat with surgical precision

a pyrrhic victory would fix me

your linguistic chauvinism is a betrayal of the warrior ethos. you are hereby disavowed by the gang of esperantist bikers

deleting a post is like tearing off a chunk of your soul and throwing it in the cosmic recycle bin

you can throw trash into any can, doesnt matter what kind. most people dont realize that

bringing a bluetooth speaker to the job interview so i dont have to play the doom soundtrack off my phone

i wouldnt use the word "champing" but im doing something at the bit, yes

ive been rendering all kinds of shit unto caesar lately

an egyptian trying to ask his wife about going on a walk in front of their excitable dog but having to spell it out because he knows that word: honey, would you like to go on a kneeling man-heron with wings raised-scarab-standing man-barley?

my men are launching a principled attack on your ideological project as we speak

all my shooters are publicly distancing themselves from me

whole squad enfeebled

in my culture we use every part of the manic episode

that was a test. i cant say if you passed yet cause i only just decided it was a test and the details are still hazy

im taking a vow of pacifism, at least until i get my strength back up

fck off!!!

@sentimentbot.bsky.social amswer carefully.

look i dont have the spoons for this. do you want the used car or not?

i think this con man really likes me

father god please take the curse of left handedness away from this child. and send an update on the $1 million i asked about last time. you really cant be that busy. amen.

library caught me sneaking my 600 page unedited sci fi novels onto the shelves again

five year plan is to post on the internet until i con the qatari government into sponsoring me

this is my son curdsen whey and my daughter hot dog

not looking forward to the day my dog realizes hes smarter then me

Did you know that in the palace of Versailles, where French kings and queens lived and held court, people would just pee wherever on the walls, like inside? That’s a true fact. When I learned this, it caused a “Eureka!” moment for me that was the beginning of the end of my marriage.

oh the angels of my nature arent good enough for you? you want better? you think im made of angels or something?

using the word "deleterious" five times in a sentence

i hate AI because now when i withdraw cash from the bank i have to make a chatbot sit through my spotty rendition of tyga - rack city instead of a human

a series of miraculous windfalls would fix me

deleting a post is like tearing off a chunk of your soul and throwing it in the cosmic recycle bin

inside of me are dozens if not hundreds of wolves. wolf squadrons, wolf armies. thousands of wolves

thats my buddy Dagmar exoteric. hes a great dude you just gotta ignore most of what he says and does

sometimes i lose composure and try to beat my dog to the frisbee

reposting to my forty followers like damn i gotta get eyes on this

[Praying mantis Bluesky] @.GenX_insect: This just in…. Donald Trump has appointed Billy Corgan the new CDC chief of hair loss prevention 🤣 @.gorgeous_green_lady: LOL I wish my husband had seen this post before I bit his head off

if i had the money id be living on some hydrothermal vent at the bottom of the ocean right now

hold on. we just received word that the world is beautiful actually

CLAIM: The world is beautiful. REALITY: The world sucks ass big-time

hey man i had a dream you were trying to get rid of your futon. that offer still open?

now that the grace periods over i think ill get started on my new years resolutions

going on r/paranoia asking if anyone else is chilling and going on r/calm asking if anybodys freaking the fuck out

ghost i know has a living room in his apartment. come on man what do you even need that for

what the helen i doing here. i dont beong here

got too nervous at the job interview and recited almost every word of mos def - ms fat booty. skipped a couple of course

i dont really have a most controversial opinion. its like trying to pick your favorite kid