that being said, happy new year to all the lovelies and freakos on here!!!!

going to bed 30 mins before midnight :) idgaf

uploading carrots to horse internet

Stones, rocks and gravel: a naturally gluten-free food

There should be one time zone called ”The Time Zone”

oh sweet Jesus how did i forget about this one, i think about it all the time lmao

ME: (first day practicing Bug Law) May it please the Court— BUG JUDGE: (sternly) Bug Court.

RIP to such a funny person we bring this one up all the time

How could my grasslands possibly be too verdant

It’s so important to read badly written books that you hate

circumcised by his own lightsaber

Search from:@badbisque.bsky.social chicken

"my stinking ass!!!", he exclaimed

😊

chicken discotheque

Kirk: Beam me up Scotty Scotty: I will do it later

The cloacal farts have to be next level

Spirit of Sebulba senior living community

Imagination is the devil's paint

@badbisque.bsky.social chicken stilettos

merry chickenmas

this holiday season, opt for comfort AND style with The Pervert's Choice®

limited edition marzipan-flavored WD40, for the holidays

Changing my name to Bastion Crappo

Traditional Christmas origami shuriken

I'll have a men's hot dog, please

i’m going to be eating a big pinecone on live tv tonight

don't worry about me babe, im just

Vicks Vapor Rub Reduction

Local watering hole “Slobbering Knob” to close after falling short of gofundme goal

You reading my tweets

not in the mood for this "behavior" lol

How’s my walking? Call 1-800-ON-FOOT

Presents of Christmas: Legacy of Gifts

USB-powered tiny Christmas Trees that completely disable Teams and Outlook until after January 1st when you plug them into any work computer USB port.

experienced help wanted at the grinch hospital

Joy up bro frfr! Ts holiday season goes dummy!

Pig of Plenty has been reduced to Pig of Paucity after being hit with the Beam of Diminishment - you lose the Porcine Prosperity buff

alexa, set toilet to 'boil' mode

exclusively using the crone filter for all photos until further notice

big sneeze followed by 2 lil burps 🤘

my favorite break room activity is emitting piercing inhuman screams

u know what else i never got is ppl combining maple syrup and brown sugar in their oatmeal; both very good and super sweet all on their lonesome imo

i crack up when these freaks are like "ai is the only way to come up with new ideas" bc i come up with new ideas all the time; here's 2 right off the dome what if there was a little toaster for ur business cards what abt dressing like raccoons to get perfectly good food from supermarket dumpsters

butter wrench

Christmas hits different during the holidays