a lot of the time when im high, i notice even more how much men HATE women it's wild like they hate even the idea of us damn

i think the gnome in my snowglobe is sick of my shit (closed the drapes on his lil cabin several days ago)

[the gnome in my snowglobe watching me debate whether to eat the chip that fell behind the trashcan for several minutes] jfc

wrinkly apple? wrinkly apple tn queen? 👀👴🍏

selecting the wrinkliest apple in the claw machine

dipping my brain like a candy apple

it's fine if ur heart feels like a rotting apple in ur chest

pls help a homie out

Sorry for flooding the timeline with my gay wallet but i want to give everyone a chance to enter!!!

your job should make you physically ill. this is good for your character, and more importantly for the economy

alvin and the chunks

it's got chunks of sauce, just like mom used to make

kirkland signature chunks

It's gay to heat up milk. "Louis pasteur" a straight person isnt named this and wouldn't do what he did

You come over my house and see a humongous oil portrait of you mounted above the grand staircase

you've ewe la

[kubrick staring at toilet] not now babe, im identifying synergistic opportunities

or whatever the case my b

quilted* fuck

[cat exiting a tiny portapotty with tp on his back foot]

Is everything ok bro? I noticed your freezer doesn’t have a lot of loose packets of orange sauce in it

chicken cheerleader

My mom passed away 3 weeks ago after a 7-year battle with lung cancer. We’re trying to raise $8,536 for funeral expenses since we don’t have insurance and barely any income. Any support or even sharing this would mean the world to us right now. Please, I’m desperate. ko-fi.com/ellienoctis/...

flesh-colored mustache

i take the brain pills erry day but i still have to fight with myself to shower, brush teeth, exercise, not-depression-nap every single day 🤙

Help a trans woman out for Pride? Unemployed, recovering from surgery, running low on food, $400 behind on rent, feeling pretty hopeless rn EleanorIsWeird on venmo and cash app; anything helps! Thank you 💜

puzzle dust is interesting

mushroom cider

he's a spilling icon

my toilet wine influencer has gone woke 😞

FINE

anyone wanna put my clothes in the dryer 4 me

I need a little help. I’ve started a fundraiser to help cover rent while I keep searching for work and try to navigate a career transition. I hate asking . If you can help, or even just share it around, I’d really appreciate it. gofund.me/ab11e9c4d

barkeep, another round of ur finest pigwine for the table

rent is due today, please help our friend speedy if u can 💜

I've never seen an Austin Power movie but I still feel like his legacy lives through me.

drinking deeply from a cup of solid gold

someone help lol

saw a really good impression of statham as jar jar on here the other day and i can't for the life of me find it again

i'm running out of time and really want to stay housed i'm sorry i keep posting this but i have to thank you for your patience

I am trying to grow on other platforms if you don't mind sharing my Ebay, please help this small business grow and get some sales. Trying to sell some items to make money for groceries and bills. www.ebay.com/usr/jumpyjel...

Everything could suddenly become very cool. Maybe that will happen soon

Having to explain the differences between a wraith, a lich, and a ghast to the police in my racketeering deposition

helpful guy who takes fire extinguishers out of their cases and makes a little library there ☺️

cargs are a fine pant, i feel sorry for ppl who think otherwise 🤙

chicken gloves

witticisms are my quiptonite

thai basil stir-fry with a lot more scallion and double the sauce from last time

sugar packets are sooo cute

access the big mac of ur mind NOW if u want to survive