one of my legs is just as long as the other

picture a guy with newly implanted permanent ear plugs and saying "hair plugs! i said i wanted hair plugs" hahaha right?

do not weep for me, faithful homies,

alright imma head out

1 single like at 2 in the morning is sweeter then ten thousand likes in the day

when i use a period in a post i always feel like such a drama queen

airforce 1 disappeared in the bermuda traingle

explosions in the sky is just "rock" now. we've reached that point in the timeline

who's the most literally evil person you still kick it with?

air force 1 actually never turned around

(not knowing at all what goth subculture is) girl why you always clad in dark garb

epsom sauce

someone did a rancid fart on air force 1

richard gere is a nepo baby, his dad is al gere

My GPA? That's none of your GDB.

i promise this isn't really about fishing in animal crossing #blug

What’s up with the extent to which

This is just a real person who’s alive right now - something to consider

how many white ceddar cheez-its are you allocated, on a daily basis, in federal prison

the coldness of outside has got me saying "damn"

actually it's pronounced "poag"

do you think you could score 30 points in an nba or wnba game if you were allowed to see a map of the basketball court beforehand

she's got a little Latino Harriet Tubman situation going on at her place. all legit, from the heart. no cash.

[David Lynch] This young director (he's thirty-four) has extraordinary taste; it's not that kind of taste that enervates artists—it's closer to grace. (1980)

original puddah

askig cop if he would like to walk away from it all an be my tradwife

dreamt i finally told my dad my depression isn't really determined by the daily weather at all. i don't think that's something he actually believes irl but it still felt good

yeah so i caught The Intolerable Madness but it's been mild so far

3:04am

you ate poenis and Weird food 😭

round round poog around, i poog around,

i've just eaten several naughty things

she had the poog of an angel

I'm going to hear hear your ass. Going to say hear hear out loud once you've finished speaking

what are the nook tykes doing with all the bugs i sell them. and the great petrified bones

I've known everyone in the world since we were kids

i just checked in at Pretzel Prison on foursquare

i <3 stealing from the goodwill

found an old newspaper clipping of my best friend DingGer Choppings

You will never regret taking it easy

Imagine your best friend smiling

We are all poopyheads in the eyes of the state

games went off when they added japanese role playing

can i quickly check for poop under your nails?

Sobbing uncontrollably by the river and yelling, "You're not my real father," at the crawdads.

why does perry the platypus dress like a pinkerton

lasagna is a dadgum creation. it's a myth

beaming into my animal crossing island with an ak