Hello darkness you dumb bitch

Lead us not into various shit But deliver us from other crap

Staying touch

computer. tell bedtime story. 13th century pikemen. no romance

This dr bronners bottle could have been an email

William “Braveheart” Wallace

sorry i can’t tonight listening to Beowulf in the original Saxon dialect performed by professional storyteller Svanur Thorkelsson

this scientist taught an ape how to torture

meet me under the cocktower at five. bring the briefcase

Yeah that’s squid goals

“congratulations, from me.” – Old Sam

The best always comes last! I am of course referring to residue.

It would be easy to post "beds are high-key slept on". It might even gain some traction, it's got the right words in the right order. But no, it would lessen us both - It would be as if we were chewing at the cud in the field, contented only by the thoughtless motion.

Finch Letter 532: I die and am reborn over and over. My bulbous beak made it impossible to extract tasty seeds so I died and was reborn a needle-beak loser, too fragile to crack seeds. All I can do is stuff these letters in a bottle. The previous 531 all just say “seeds” so that’s what that’s about

when I have a post that doesn't quite land it's usually bc i'm on a dirtbike doing stunts so I'm a little distracted

Hello Whenever®

If we all synchronise our movements just right we can produce a dazzling visual illusion that disorients and confuses all predators

"my new conception is that death is both the most meaningful and meaningless thing in the world. a sign without an object. significant before ever appearing yet, having once passed, lacking anything to signify" caretaker of my building: please young man why do you keep coming down here?

sorry i'm late boss i'm suffering from whatever it was the Victorians called 'Brain Fever'

ceorl dinner

i have the illness that makes you feel sick

hello’d ween soon

just a taste of the areas in which i am expert

gunk... you can't see it until it accrues in high enough volume, but it's everywhere around us

When I was a boy, people didn't go about in their pajamas. They went about in perfect dignity, averting their gazes from one another as the rain lashed them for hours and hours.

books are the teeth of literature

asking my dad to write me a note that says i don't have to go to work tomorrow

me listening to Loveless (1991)

My Damn Grievance

it's fun to guess if everyone is writing deranged night time posts or deranged morning time posts

All movies are very slowly improvised

He had found it. The secret to all human misery, an informatic tumor hidden behind the very disorder it causes: the cascade of self-examining thought. Now, all he had left to do was feed his revelations to an LLM and email them to 451 academics in completely unrelated fields. Humanity would be saved

A lot of you would finally speak to a therapist if the therapist simply disguised herself as a manager

tell me you didn't just go genius mode in stupid land 🤦‍♂️

sorry i’m late boss:

my most frequently used words on bsky—because who doesn’t good time need love think make know

Just corrected my posture on the train and became the dominant commuter

every time i feel anxious and unsettled i just try to remember that beneath the earth lies an immense stone labyrinth that awaits us with the patience of a hunter

pæce of chæse

-William Shakespeare

The Strange Case of the Odd Occurance

This is his time.

some day they're going to read all our posts in a court of law against us. I just hope they go in order and don't cherrypick

Mommy am I in a terror network?

no man you need to talk to the bread department. i only work the circus side

sorry i’m late the downstairs lobby is apparently “an inappropriate venue” for the gentle and soothing tones of the paleolithic bone flute

Playing the shit out of my flute

every time i feel anxious and unsettled i just try to remember that beneath the earth lies an immense stone labyrinth that awaits us with the patience of a hunter

called into HR for muttering “Chapters on Greek Fish-Lore. Hermes Zeitschrift für klassische Philologie, 28. 1973 (Laminated Brochure)” under my breath nonstop